148175966 annamalai swami doc

8/12/2019 148175966 Annamalai Swami Doc

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Annamalai Swami

1906-1995

Annamalai Swami was born in 1906 in a small village in Tamil Nadu, southern India. He was

named Sella Perumal, and rom an earl! age showed a "een interest in s#iritualit!.

In 19$%, when he was $$ !ears old, he traveled to Tiruvannamalai to meet &hagavan Sri 'amana

(aharshi who lived near the )it! along the base o the slo#e o the hol! mountain Aruna)hala.

*ollowing in the ootste#s o Sri Seshadri Swamigal, who saved the !oung 'amana rom theravages o inse)ts and vermin in the underground vault he irst inhabited, and Palaniswami, whosta!ed with 'amana in +iru#a"sha ave and S"andasraman ave, he be)ame the (aharshi-s

#ersonal attendant and given the name Annamalai Swami Annamalai is another name or

Aruna)hala/. Swami Annamalai-s duties, ater being dire)ted to do so b! Sri 'amana, was tooversee all #hases o the ongoing )onstru)tion, )ontinuing e#ansion, and #ositive growth o the

'amana Ashram, in)luding the goshala )ow shed/, dining hall, dis#ensar! and other #roe)ts.


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HOW THE ASHRAM LOOKED WHEN ANNAMALAI ARRIVED IN1928

"Just remain like the sky and let thought-clouds come and go."

QUESTION : What is the easiest way to be free of the 'littleself'?

The Self is always attained, it is always realised; it is not somethin that yo!ha"e to see#, rea$h or dis$o"er% &o!r "asanas mental habits and tenden$ies(and all the wron ideas yo! ha"e abo!t yo!rself are blo$#in and hidin thee)*erien$e of the real Self% If yo! don't identify with the wron ideas, yo!r Self+nat!re will not be hidden from yo!%

&o! said that yo! needed hel*% If yo! desire to ain a *ro*er !nderstandin ofyo!r real nat!re is intense eno!h, hel* will a!tomati$ally $ome% If yo! want to

enerate an awareness of yo!r real nat!re yo! will be immeas!rably hel*ed byha"in $onta$t with a nani realised bein(% The *ower and ra$e whi$h a naniradiates -!ieten the mind and a!tomati$ally eliminate the wron ideas yo!ha"e abo!t yo!rself% &o! $an ma#e *roress by ha"in satsan asso$iation( ofa realised .!r! and by $onstant s*irit!al *ra$ti$e% The .!r! $annot doe"erythin for yo!% If yo! want to i"e !* the limitin habits of many lifetimes,yo! m!st *ra$tise $onstantly%


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/ost *eo*le ta#e the a**earan$e of the sna#e in the ro*e to be reality% 0$tinon their mis*er$e*tions they thin# !* many different ways of #illin the sna#e%They $an ne"er s!$$eed in ettin rid of the sna#e !ntil they i"e !* the ideathat there is a sna#e there at all% 1eo*le who want to #ill or $ontrol the mindha"e the same *roblem: they imaine that there is a mind whi$h needs to be

$ontrolled and ta#e drasti$ ste*s to beat it into s!bmission% If, instead, theyenerated the !nderstandin that there is no s!$h thin as the mind, all there*roblems wo!ld $ome to an end% &o! m!st enerate the $on"i$tion, 2I am theall+*er"asi"e $ons$io!sness in whi$h all bodies and minds in the world area**earin and disa**earin% I am that $ons$io!sness whi$h remains !n$hanedand !naffe$ted by these a**earan$es and disa**earan$es2% Stabilise yo!rself inthat $on"i$tion% That is all yo! need to do%

3haa"an 4amana /aharshi( on$e told a story abo!t a man who wanted tob!ry his own shadow in a dee* *it% 5e d! the *it and stood in s!$h a *ositionthat his shadow was on the bottom of it% The man then tried to b!ry it by

$o"erin it with earth% Ea$h time he threw some soil in the hole the shadowa**eared on to* of it% Of $o!rse, he ne"er s!$$eeded in b!ryin the shadow%/any *eo*le beha"e li#e this when they meditate% They ta#e the mind to bereal, try to fiht it and #ill it, and always fail% These fihts aainst the mind areall mental a$ti"ities whi$h strenthen the mind instead of wea#enin it% If yo!want to et rid of the mind, all yo! ha"e to do is !nderstand that it is 'not me'%6!lti"ate the awareness 2I am the immanent $ons$io!sness2% When that!nderstandin be$omes firm, the non+e)istent mind will not tro!ble yo!%

Question:I don't thin# that re*eatin 2I am not the mind, I am $ons$io!sness2will e"er $on"in$e me that I am not the mind% It will !st be another tho!ht

oin on within the mind% If I $o!ld e)*erien$e, e"en for a moment, what it isli#e to be witho!t the mind, the $on"i$tion wo!ld a!tomati$ally $ome% I thin#that one se$ond of e)*erien$in $ons$io!sness as it really is wo!ld be more$on"in$in that se"eral years of mental re*etitions%

Annamalai Swami:E"ery time yo! o to slee* yo! ha"e the e)*erien$e ofbein witho!t a mind% &o! $annot deny that yo! e)ist while yo! are aslee* andyo! $annot deny that yo!r mind is not f!n$tionin while yo! are in dreamlessslee*% This daily e)*erien$e sho!ld $on"in$e yo! that it is *ossible to $ontin!eyo!r e)isten$e witho!t a mind% Of $o!rse, yo! do not ha"e the f!ll e)*erien$e of$ons$io!sness while yo! are aslee*, b!t if yo! thin# abo!t what ha**ens d!rin

this state yo! sho!ld $ome to !nderstand that yo!r e)isten$e, the $ontin!ity ofyo!r bein, is in no way de*endent on yo!r mind or yo!r identifi$ation with it%When the mind rea**ears e"ery mornin yo! instantly !m* to the $on$l!sion2This is the real me2% If yo! refle$t on this *ro*osition for some time yo! will seehow abs!rd it is% If what yo! really are only e)ists when the mind is *resent, yo!ha"e to a$$e*t that yo! didn't e)ist while yo! were aslee*% No one will a$$e*ts!$h an abs!rd $on$l!sion% If yo! analyse yo!r alternatin states yo! willdis$o"er that it is yo!r dire$t e)*erien$e that yo! e)ist whether yo! are awa#e


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or aslee*% &o! will also dis$o"er that the mind only be$omes a$ti"e while yo!are wa#in or dreamin% 7rom these sim*le daily e)*erien$es it sho!ld be easyto !nderstand that the mind is somethin that $omes and oes% &o!r e)isten$eis not wi*ed o!t ea$h time the mind $eases to f!n$tion% I am not tellin yo!some *hiloso*hi$al theory; I am tellin yo! somethin that yo! $an "alidate by

dire$t e)*erien$e in any twenty+fo!r ho!r *eriod of yo!r life%

Ta#e these fa$ts, whi$h yo! $an dis$o"er by dire$tly e)*erien$in them, andin"estiate them a little more% When the mind a**ears e"ery mornin don't!m* to the !s!al $on$l!sion, 2This is me; these tho!hts are mine%2 Instead,wat$h these tho!hts $ome and o witho!t identifyin with them in any way% Ifyo! $an resist the im*!lse to $laim ea$h and e"ery tho!ht as yo!r own, yo!will $ome to a startlin $on$l!sion: yo! will dis$o"er that yo! are the$ons$io!sness in whi$h the tho!hts a**ear and disa**ear% &o! are allowed tor!n free% 8i#e the sna#e whi$h a**ears in the ro*e, yo! will dis$o"er that themind is only an ill!sion whi$h a**ears thro!h inoran$e or mis*er$e*tion%

&o! want some e)*erien$e whi$h will $on"in$e yo! that what I am sayin istr!e% &o! $an ha"e that e)*erien$e if yo! i"e !* yo!r life+lon habit ofin"entin an 'I' whi$h $laims all tho!hts as 'mine'% 3e $ons$io!s of yo!rself as$ons$io!sness alone, wat$h all the tho!hts $ome and o% 6ome to the$on$l!sion, by dire$t e)*erien$e, that yo! are really $ons$io!sness itself, not itse*hemeral $ontents%

6lo!ds $ome and o in the s#y b!t the a**earan$e and disa**earan$e of the$lo!ds doesn't affe$t the s#y% &o!r real nat!re is li#e the s#y, li#e s*a$e% 9!stremain li#e the s#y and let tho!ht+$lo!ds $ome and o% If yo! $!lti"ate this

attit!de of indifferen$e towards the mind, rad!ally yo! will $ease to identifyyo!rself with it%

Question:When I bean to do sadhana s*irit!al *ra$ti$e( e"erythin wentsmoothly at first% There was a lot of *ea$e and ha**iness and nana tr!e#nowlede( seemed "ery near% 3!t nowadays there is hardly any *ea$e, !stmental obsta$les and hindran$es%

Annamalai Swami:Whene"er obsta$les $ome on the *ath, thin# of them asnot me'% 6!lti"ate the attit!de that the real yo! is beyond the rea$h of alltro!bles and obsta$les% There are no obsta$les for the Self% If yo! $an remember

that yo! always are the Self, obsta$les will be of no im*ortan$e%

One of the al"ars a ro!* of aishna"ite saints( on$e remar#ed that if one isnot doin any s*irit!al *ra$ti$e one is not aware of any mind *roblems% 5e saidthat it is only when one starts to do meditation that one be$omes aware of thedifferent ways that the mind $a!ses !s tro!ble% This is "ery tr!e% 3!t one sho!ldnot worry abo!t any of the obsta$les or fear them% One sho!ld merely reardthem as bein not me% They $an only $a!se yo! tro!ble while yo! thin# that


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they are yo!r *roblems%

The obstr!$tin "asanas may loo# li#e a lare mo!ntain whi$h obstr!$ts yo!r*roress% on't be intimidated by the si


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Question:5ow does maya o*erate? 5ow does it oriinate? Sin$e nothin e)istse)$e*t the Self, how does the Self manae to $on$eal its own nat!re from itself?

Annamalai Swami:The Self, whi$h is infinite *ower and the so!r$e of all*ower, is indi"isible% &et within this indi"isible Self there are fi"e sha#tis or

*owers, with "aryin f!n$tions, whi$h o*erate sim!ltaneo!sly% The fi"e sha#tisare $reation, *reser"ation, destr!$tion, "eilin maya sha#ti( and ra$e% Thefifth sha#ti, ra$e, $o!ntera$ts and remo"es the fo!rth sha#ti, whi$h is maya%

When maya is totally ina$ti"e, that is, when the identity with the body and themind has been dro**ed, there is an awareness of $ons$io!sness, of bein% Whenone is established in that state there is no body, no mind and no world% Thesethree thins are !st ideas whi$h are bro!ht into an a**arent e)isten$e whenmaya is *resent and a$ti"e%

When maya is a$ti"e, the sole effe$ti"e way to dissol"e it is the *ath shown by

3haa"an: one m!st do self+en-!iry and dis$riminate between what is real andwhat is !nreal% It is the *ower of maya whi$h ma#es !s belie"e in the reality ofthins whi$h ha"e no reality o!tside o!r imaination% If yo! as#, 2What arethese imainary thins?2 the answer is, 2E"erythin that is not the formlessSelf2% The Self alone is real; e"erythin else is a fiment of o!r imaination%

It is not hel*f!l to en-!ire why there is maya and how it o*erates% If yo! are in aboat whi$h is lea#in, yo! don=t waste time as#in whether the hole was madeby an Italian, a 7ren$hman or an Indian% &o! !st *l! the lea#% on't worryabo!t where maya $omes from% 1!t all yo!r enery into es$a*in from its effe$t%If yo! try to in"estiate the oriin of maya with yo!r mind yo! are doomed to

fail be$a!se any answer yo! $ome !* with will be a maya answer% If yo! want to!nderstand how maya o*erates and oriinates yo! sho!ld establish yo!rself inthe Self, the one *la$e where yo! $an be free of it, and then wat$h how it ta#esyo! o"er ea$h time yo! fail to #ee* yo!r attention there%

Question:&o! say that maya is one of the sha#tis% What e)a$tly do yo! meanby sha#ti?

Annamalai Swami:Sha#ti is enery or *ower% It is a name for the dynami$as*e$t of the Self% Sha#ti and shanti *ea$e( are two as*e$ts of the same$ons$io!sness% If yo! want to se*arate them at all, yo! $an say that shanti is

the !nmanifest as*e$t of the Self while sha#ti is the manifest% 3!t really theyare not se*arate% 0 flame has two *ro*erties: liht and heat% The two $annot bese*arate%

Shanti and sha#ti are li#e the sea and its wa"es% Shanti, the !nmanifest as*e$t,is the "ast !nmo"in body of water% The wa"es that a**ear and mo"e on thes!rfa$e are sha#ti% Shanti is motionless, "ast and all+en$om*assin, whereaswa"es are a$ti"e%


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3haa"an !sed to say that after realisation the i"anm!#ta liberated one(e)*erien$es shanti within and is established *ermanently in that shanti% In thatstate of realisation he sees that all a$ti"ities are $a!sed by sha#ti% 0fterrealisation one is aware that there is no indi"id!al *eo*le doin anythin%

Instead there is an awareness that all a$ti"ities are the sha#ti of the one Self%The nani, who is f!lly established in the shanti, is always aware that sha#ti isnot se*arate from him% In that awareness e"erythin is his Self and all a$tionsare his% 0lternati"ely, it is e-!ally $orre$t to say that he ne"er does anythin%This is one of the *arado)es of the Self%

The !ni"erse is $ontrolled by the one sha#ti, sometimes $alled 1arameswarasha#ti the *ower of the S!*reme 8ord(% This mo"es and orders all thins%Nat!ral laws, s!$h as the laws that #ee* the *lanets in their orbits, are allmanifestations of this sha#ti%

Question:&o! say that e"erythin is the Self, e"en maya% If this is so, why$an't I see the Self $learly? Why is it hidden from me?

Annamalai Swami:3e$a!se yo! are loo#in in the wron dire$tion% &o! ha"ethe idea that the Self is somethin that yo! see or e)*erien$e% This is not so%The Self is the awareness or the $ons$io!sness in whi$h the seein and thee)*erien$in ta#e *la$e%

E"en if yo! don't see the Self, the Self is still there% 3haa"an sometimesremar#ed h!moro!sly: 21eo*le !st o*en a news*a*er and lan$e thro!h it%Then they say, 2I ha"e seen the *a*er2% 3!t really they ha"en't seen the *a*er,

they ha"e only seen the letters and *i$t!res that are on it% There $an be nowords or *i$t!res witho!t the *a*er, b!t *eo*le always foret the *a*er whilethey are readin the words%2

3haa"an wo!ld then !se this analoy to show that while *eo*le see the namesand forms that a**ear on the s$reen of $ons$io!sness, the inore the s$reenitself% With this #ind of *artial "ision it is easy to $ome to the $on$l!sion that allforms are !n$onne$ted with ea$h other and se*arate from the *erson who seesthem% If *eo*le were to be aware of the $ons$io!sness instead of the forms thata**ear in it, they wo!ld realise that all forms are !st a**earan$es whi$hmanifest within the one indi"isible $ons$io!sness%

That $ons$io!sness is the Self that yo! are loo#in for% &o! $an be that$ons$io!sness b!t yo! $an ne"er see it be$a!se it is not somethin that isse*arate from yo!%

Question:&o! tal# a lot abo!t "asanas% 6o!ld yo! *lease tell me e)a$tly whatthey are and how they f!n$tion?

Annamalai Swami:asanas are habits of the mind% They are the mista#en


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identifi$ations and the re*eated tho!ht *atterns that o$$!r aain and aain% Itis the "asanas whi$h $o"er !* the e)*erien$e of the Self% asanas arise, $at$hyo!r attention, and *!ll yo! o!twards towards the world rather than inwardstowards the Self% This ha**ens so often and so $ontin!o!sly that the mind ne"erets a $han$e to rest or to !nderstand its real nat!re%

6o$#s li#e to $law the ro!nd% It is a *er*et!al habit with them% E"en if they arestandin on bare ro$# they still try to s$rat$h the ro!nd%

asanas f!n$tion in m!$h the same the way% They are habits and *atterns oftho!ht that a**ear aain and aain e"en if they are not wanted% /ost of o!rideas and tho!hts are in$orre$t% When they rise habit!ally as "asanas theybrainwash !s into thin#in that they are tr!e% The f!ndamental "asanas s!$h as2I am the body2 or 2I am the mind2 ha"e a**eared in !s so many times that wea!tomati$ally a$$e*t that they are tr!e% E"en o!r desire to trans$end o!r"asanas is a "asana% When we thin# 2I m!st meditate2 or 2I m!st ma#e an

effort2 we are !st oranisin a fiht between two different "asanas% &o! $anonly es$a*e the habits of the mind by abidin in $ons$io!sness as$ons$io!sness% 3e who yo! are% 9!st be still% Inore all the "asanas that rise inthe mind and instead fi) yo!r attention in the Self%

Question:3haa"an often told de"otees to 23e still2% id he mean 23e mentallystill2?

Annamalai Swami: 3haa"an's famo!s instr!$tion 2s!mma ir!2 be still( isoften mis!nderstood% It does not mean that yo! sho!ld be *hysi$ally still; itmeans that yo! sho!ld always abide in the Self% If there is too m!$h *hysi$al

stillness, tamo!na a state of mental tor*or( arises and *redominates% In thatstate yo! will feel "ery slee*y and mentally d!ll% 4ao!na a state of e)$essi"emental a$ti"ity(, on the other hand, *rod!$es emotions and a mind whi$h isrestless% In satt"a !na a state of mental -!ietness and $larity( there isstillness and harmony% If mental a$ti"ity is ne$essary while one is in satt"a !nait ta#es *la$e% 3!t for the rest of the time there is stillness% When tamo!na andrao!na *redominate, the Self $annot be felt% If satt"a !na *redominates onee)*erien$es *ea$e, bliss, $larity and an absen$e of wanderin tho!hts% That isthe stillness that 3haa"an was *res$ribin%

Question:3haa"an, in Talks with Ramana Maharshi, s*ea#s of bhoa "asanas

"asanas whi$h are for enoyment( and bandha "asanas "asanas whi$h *rod!$ebondae(% 5e says that for the nani there are bhoa "asanas b!t no bandha"asanas% Wo!ld Swamii *lease $larify the differen$e%

Annamalai Swami:Nothin $an $a!se bondae for the nani be$a!se his mindis dead% In the absen$e of a mind he #nows himself only as $ons$io!sness%3e$a!se the mind is dead, he is no loner able to identify himself with the body%3!t e"en tho!h he #nows that he is not the body, it is a fa$t that the body is


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still ali"e% That body will $ontin!e to li"e, and the nani will $ontin!e to be awareof it, !ntil its own #arma destined a$tion( is e)ha!sted% 3e$a!se the nani is stillaware of the body, he will also be aware of the tho!hts and "asanas that arisein that body% None of these "asanas has the *ower to $a!se bondae for himbe$a!se he ne"er identifies with them, b!t they do ha"e the *ower to ma#e the

body beha"e in $ertain ways% The body of the nani enoys and e)*erien$esthese "asanas altho!h the nani himself is not affe$ted by them% That is why itis sometimes said that for the nani there are bhoa "asanas b!t no bandha"asanas%

The bhoa "asanas differ from nani to nani% Some nanis may a$$!m!latewealth, some may sit in silen$e; some may st!dy the shastra S$ri*t!res( whileothers may remain illiterate; some may et married ands raise families, b!tothers may be$ome $elibate mon#s% It is the bhoa "asanas whi$h determinethe #ind of lifestyle a nani will lead% The nani is aware of the $onse-!en$es ofall these "asanas witho!t e"er identifyin with them% 3e$a!se of this he ne"er

falls ba$# into samsara worldly ill!sion( aain%

The "asanas arise be$a!se of the habits and *ra$ti$es of *re"io!s lifetimes%That is why they differ from nani to nani% When "asanas rise in ordinary *eo*lewho still identify with the body and the mind, they $a!se li#es and disli#es%Some "asanas are embra$ed wholeheartedly while others are ree$ted as bein!ndesirable% These li#es and disli#es enerate desires and fears whi$h in t!rn*rod!$e more #arma% While yo! are still ma#in !dements abo!t what is oodand what is bad, yo! are identifyin with the mind and ma#in new #arma foryo!rself% When new #arma has been $reated li#e this, it means yo! ha"e to ta#eanother birth to enoy it%

The nani's body $arries o!t all the a$ts whi$h are destined for it% 3!t be$a!sethe nani ma#es no !dement abo!t what is ood or bad, and be$a!se he hasno li#es or disli#es, he is not $reatin any new #arma for himself% 3e$a!se he#nows that he is not the body, he $an witness all its a$ti"ities witho!t ettinin"ol"ed in them in any way%

There will be no rebirth for the nani be$a!se on$e the mind has been destroyedthere is no *ossibility of any new #arma bein $reated%

Question:So whate"er ha**ens to !s in life only ha**ens be$a!se of o!r *ast

li#es and disli#es?

Annamalai Swami: &es%

Question:5ow $an one learn not to rea$t when "asanas arise in the mind? Isthere anythin s*e$ial that we sho!ld be loo#in o!t for?

Annamalai Swami:&o! m!st learn to re$onise them when they arise% That is


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the only way% If yo! $an $at$h them early eno!h and fre-!ently eno!h theywill not $a!se yo! tro!ble% If yo! want to *ay attention to a s*e$ial area ofdaner, wat$h how the fi"e senses o*erate% It is the nat!re of the mind to see#stim!lation thro!h the fi"e senses% The mind $at$hes hold of sense im*ressionsand *ro$esses them in s!$h a way that they *rod!$e lon $hains of !n$ontrolled

tho!hts% 8earn to wat$h how yo!r senses beha"e% 8earn to wat$h how the mindrea$ts to sense im*ressions% If yo! $an sto* the mind from rea$tin to senseim*ressions yo! $an eliminate a lare n!mber of yo!r "asanas%

3haa"an ne"er li#e or disli#ed anythin% If we ha"e li#es or disli#es, if we hateor lo"e someone or somethin, some bondae will arise in the mind% 9nanisne"er li#e or disli#e anythin% That is why they are free of all bondae%

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>%%

Annamalai Swami Bhagavan [Ramana Maharshi] has said: When

thoughts arise stop them from developing b en!uiring" #$o whom is thisthought %oming&' as soon as the thought appears( What does it matter ifman thoughts )eep %oming up& *n!uire into their origin or find out whohas the thoughts and sooner or later the flow of thoughts will stop(+ $his ishow self,en!uir should be pra%ti%ed(

When Bhagavan spo)e li)e this he sometimes used the analog of abesiged fort( -f one sstemati%all loses off all the entran%es to su%h a fortand then pi%)s off the o%%upants one b one as the tr to %ome out"sooner or later the fort willl be be empt(

Bhagavan said that we should appl these same ta%ti%s to the mind( .owto go about doing this& Seal off the entran%es and e/its to the mind b notrea%ting to rising thoughts or sense impressions( 0on+t let new ideas"

1udgements" li)es" disli)es" et%( enter the mind" and don+t let rising thoughtsflourish and es%ape our attention(

When ou have sealed off the mind in this wa" %hallenge ea%h emergingthought as it appears b as)ing" Where have ou %ome from&+ or Who isthe person who is having this thought&+ -f ou %an do this %ontinuousl"with full attention" new thoughts will appear momentaril and thendisappear(


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-f ou %an maintain the siege for long enough" a time will %ome when nomore thoughts arise2 or if the do" the will onl be fleeting" undistra%tingimages on the peripher of %ons%iousness( -n that thought,free state ouwlil begin to e/perien%e ourself as %ons%iousness" not as mind or bod(

.owever" if ou rela/ our vigilan%e even for a few se%onds and allow newthoughts to es%ape and develop un%hallenged" the siege will be lifted andthe mind will regain some or all of its former strength(

-n a real fort the o%%upants need a %ontinuous suppl of food and water tohold out during a siege( When the supplies run out" the o%%upants mustsurrender or die( -n the fort of the mind the o%%upants" whi%h are thoughts"need a thin)er to pa attention to them and indulge in them(

-f the thin)er witholds his attention from rising thoughts or %hallenges thembefore the have a %han%e to develop" the thoughts will all die ofstarvation( 3ou %hallenge them b repeatedl as)ing ourself Who am -&Who is the person who is having these thoughts&+ -f the %hallenge is to beeffe%tive ou must ma)e it before the rising thought has had a %han%e todevelop into a stream of thoughts(

Mind is onl a %olle%tion of thoughts and the thin)er who thin)s them( $he

thin)er is the -+,thought" the primal thought whi%h rises from the Self beforeall others" whi%h identifies with all other thoughts and sas" - am this bod+(When ou have eradi%ated all thoughts e/%ept for the thin)er himself b%easeless en!uir or b refusing to give them an attention" the -+,thoughtsin)s into the .eart and surrenders" leaving behind it onl an awareness of%ons%iousness(

$his surrender will onl ta)e pla%e when the -+,thought has %eased toidentif with rising thoughts( While there are still stra thoughts whi%hattra%t or evade our attentoin" the -+,thought will alwas be dire%ting itsattention outwards rather than inwards( $he purpose of self,en!uir is toma)e the -+,thought move inwards" towards the Self( $his will happenautomati%all as soon as ou %ease to be interested in an of our risingthoughts(


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Sour%e: from boo) #4iving b the Words of Bhagavan'" pages 56567(

$his boo) is written b 0avid 8odman and it %ontains wonderful a%%ount ofAnnamalai Swami 4ife with Ramana Maharshi" Stories of .ow Ramana

Ashram was %onstru%ted" Annamalai Swami answers to meditation9uestions of See)ers

-f ou are having trouble with our enthusiasm for sadhana" 1ust tellourself" - ma be dead in seven das+( 4et go of all the things that oupretend are important in our dail life and instead fo%us on the Self fortwent,four hours a da( 0o it and see what happens(

Remember that nothing that happens in the mind is ou+" and none of it is

our business( 3ou don+t have to worr about the thoughts that rise upinside ou( -t is enough that ou remember that the thoughts are not ou(

8o deepl into this feeling of -+( Be aware of it so strongl and so intenselthat no other thoughts have the energ to arise and distra%t ou( -f ouhold this feeling of -+ long enough and strongl enough" the false -+ wllvanish leaving onl the unbro)en awareness of the real" immanent -+"%ons%iousness itself((

ontinuous attentiveness will onl %ome with long pra%ti%e( -f ou are trulwat%hful" ea%h thought will dissolve at the moment that it appears( But torea%h this level of disasso%iation ou must have no atta%hments at all( -fou have the slightest interest in an parti%ular thought" it will evade ourattentiveness" %onne%t with other thoughts" and ta)e over our mind for afew se%onds( $his will happen more easil if ou are a%%ustomed torea%ting emotionall to a parti%ular thought(

Self,in!uir must be done %ontinuousl( -t doesn+t wor) if ou regard it as apart,time a%tivit(

Sadhana is a battlefield( 3ou have to be vigilant( 0on+t ta)e deliver ofwrong beliefs and don+t identif with the in%oming thoughts that will giveou pain and suffering( But if these things start happening to ou" fightba%) b affirming" - am the Self2 - am the Self2 - am the Self2+( $hese


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affirmations will lessen the power of the - am the bod+ arrows andeventuall the will armour,plate ou so su%%essfull" the - am the bod+thoughts that %ome our wa will no longer have the power to tou%h ou"affe%t ou or ma)e ou suffer(

-f ou %an hold on to this )nowledge - am Self+ at all times" no furtherpra%ti%e is ne%essar(

$here is nothing wrong with loo)ing at Bhagavan+s pi%ture( -t is a ver goodpra%ti%e( But ou should not get sidetra%)ed from ou main ob1e%tive whi%his establishing ourself as %ons%iousness( 0on+t get atta%hed to states ofbliss or give them priorit over the !uest for the Self(

$here are so man thoughts in the mind( $hought after thought afterthought( But there is one thought that is %ontinuous" though it is mostlsub,%ons%ious: - am the bod+( $his is the string on whi%h all otherthoughts are threaded( ;n%e we identif ourselves with the bod bthin)ing this thought" maa follows( -t also follows that if we %ease toidentif with the bod" maa will not affe%t us anmore(When the re1e%tion of mental a%tivities be%omes %ontinuous andautomati%" ou will begin to have the e/perien%e of the Self(

A strong determination to pursue en!uir in this wa will dissolve alldoubts( B !uestioning Who am -&+ and b %onstantl meditating" one%omes to the %larit of being(As long as vasanas %ontinue to e/ist the willrise and %over the realit" obs%uring awareness of it( As often as oube%ome aware of them" !uestion" $o whom do the %ome&+ $his%ontinuous en!uir will establish ou in our own Self and ou will have nofurther problems( When ou )now that the sna)e of the mind nevere/isted" when ou )now that the rope of realit is all that e/ists" doubts andfears will not trouble ou again(

Meditation must be %ontinuous( $he %urrent of meditation must be presentin all our a%tivities( With pra%ti%e" meditation and wor) %an go onsimultaneousl(


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;ne must )eep one+s attention on the Self if one wants to ma)e progresson the spiritual path

$he thoughts that %ome and go are not ou( Whatever %omes and goes is

not ou( 3our realit is pea%e( -f ou don+t forget that" that will be enough(

Bhagavan+s famous instru%tion summa iru+ [be still] is oftenmisunderstood( -t does not mean that ou should be phsi%all still2 itmeans that ou should alwas abide in the Self< -n sattva guna [a state ofmental !uietness and %larit] there is stillness and harmon( -f mentala%tivit is ne%essar while one is in sattva guna it ta)es pla%e( But for therest of the time there is stillness< -f sattva guna predominates onee/perien%es plea%e" bliss" %larit and an absen%e of wandering thoughts(

$hat is the stillness that Bhagavan was pres%ribing(

Bhagavan is alwas present" inside ou and in front of ou( -f ou don+t%over the vision of Bhagavan with our ego" that will be enough( $he egois the - am the bod+ idea( Remove this idea and ou shine as the Self(

When - sa" Meditate on the Self+ - am as)ing ou to be the Self" not thin)about it( Be aware of what remains when thoughts stop( Be aware of the%ons%iousness that is the origin of all our thoughts( Be that

%ons%iousness(-n the same wa" mind is 1ust a Self,infli%ted area of dar)ness in whi%h thelight of the Self has been deliberatel shut out(

$he mind and the bod are both inert( An energ or pea%e oue/perien%e %an onl %ome from the Self( 0rop the identifi%ation with thebod( $hese e/perien%es are ma)ing ou too bod,%ons%ious( =ust beaware of the Self and tr to pa as little attention as possible to the bod($he Self is pure energ" pure power( .old onto that(

-f ou %an give up dualit" Brahman alone remains" and ou )now ourselfto be that Brahman" but to ma)e this dis%over %ontinuous meditation isre!uired( 0on+t allo%ate periods of time for this( 0on+t regard it assomething ou do when ou sit with our ees %losed( $his meditation has


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to be %ontinuous( 0o it while eating" wal)ing and even tal)ing( -t has to be%ontinued all the time(

Remember that nothing that happens in the mind is ou+" and none of it is

our business( 3ou don+t have to worr about the thoughts that rise upinside ou( -t is enough that ou remember that the thoughts are not ou(

$aumanuvar" a $amil saint whom Bhagavan often !uoted" wrote in one ofhis poems: M 8uru merel told me that - am %ons%iousness( .avingheard this" - held onto %ons%iousness( What he told me was 1ust onesenten%e" but - %annot des%ribe the bliss - attained from holding onto thatone simple senten%e( $hrough that one senten%e - attained a pea%e and ahappiness that %an never be e/plained in words(+

-n ever moment ou onl have one real %hoi%e: to be aware of the Self orto identif with the bod and the mind(

3ou have to )eep up the en!uir" $o whom is this happening&+ all thetime( -f ou are having trouble remind ourself" $his is 1ust happening onthe surfa%e of m mind( - am not this mind or the wandering thoughts(+

$hen go ba%) into en!uir Who am -&+(B doing this ou will penetrate deeper and deeper and be%ome deta%hed

from the mind( $his will onl %ome about after ou have made an intenseeffort(

3our ultimate need is to get established in the %hangeless pea%e of theSelf( >or this ou have to give up all thoughts(

0nnamalai Swami 3haa"an 4amana /aharshi( has said:

@When tho!hts arise sto* them from de"elo*in by en-!irin,ATo whom is this tho!ht $omin?B as soon as the tho!hta**ears% What does it matter if many tho!hts #ee* $omin !*?En-!ire into their oriin or find o!t who has the tho!hts andsooner or later the flow of tho!hts will sto*%= This is how self+en-!iry sho!ld be *ra$ti$ed%


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When 3haa"an s*o#e li#e this he sometimes !sed the analoyof a besied fort% If one systemati$ally loses off all the entran$esto s!$h a fort and then *i$#s off the o$$!*ants one by one asthey try to $ome o!t, sooner or later the fort willl be be em*ty%

3haa"an said that we sho!ld a**ly these same ta$ti$s to themind% 5ow to o abo!t doin this? Seal off the entran$es ande)its to the mind by not rea$tin to risin tho!hts or senseim*ressions% on=t let new ideas, !dements, li#es, disli#es, et$%enter the mind, and don=t let risin tho!hts flo!rish and es$a*eyo!r attention%

When yo! ha"e sealed off the mind in this way, $hallene ea$h

emerin tho!ht as it a**ears by as#in, @Where ha"e yo!$ome from?= or @Who is the *erson who is ha"in this tho!ht?= Ifyo! $an do this $ontin!o!sly, with f!ll attention, new tho!htswill a**ear momentarily and then disa**ear%

If yo! $an maintain the siee for lon eno!h, a time will $omewhen no more tho!hts arise; or if they do, they will only befleetin, !ndistra$tin imaes on the *eri*hery of $ons$io!sness%In that tho!ht+free state yo! wlil bein to e)*erien$e yo!rself as$ons$io!sness, not as mind or body%

5owe"er, if yo! rela) yo!r "iilan$e e"en for a few se$onds andallow new tho!hts to es$a*e and de"elo* !n$hallened, thesiee will be lifted and the mind will reain some or all of itsformer strenth%

In a real fort the o$$!*ants need a $ontin!o!s s!**ly of food and

water to hold o!t d!rin a siee% When the s!**lies r!n o!t, theo$$!*ants m!st s!rrender or die% In the fort of the mind theo$$!*ants, whi$h are tho!hts, need a thin#er to *ay attentionto them and ind!le in them%


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If the thin#er witholds his attention from risin tho!hts or$hallenes them before they ha"e a $han$e to de"elo*, thetho!hts will all die of star"ation% &o! $hallene them byre*eatedly as#in yo!rself @Who am I? Who is the *erson who is

ha"in these tho!hts?= If the $hallene is to be effe$ti"e yo!m!st ma#e it before the risin tho!ht has had a $han$e tode"elo* into a stream of tho!hts%

/ind is only a $olle$tion of tho!hts and the thin#er who thin#sthem% The thin#er is the @I=+tho!ht, the *rimal tho!ht whi$hrises from the Self before all others, whi$h identifies with allother tho!hts and says, @I am this body=% When yo! ha"eeradi$ated all tho!hts e)$e*t for the thin#er himself by

$easeless en-!iry or by ref!sin to i"e them any attention, the@I=+tho!ht sin#s into the 5eart and s!rrenders, lea"in behind itonly an awareness of $ons$io!sness%

This s!rrender will only ta#e *la$e when the @I=+tho!ht has$eased to identify with risin tho!hts% While there are still straytho!hts whi$h attra$t or e"ade yo!r attentoin, the @I=+tho!htwill always be dire$tin its attention o!twards rather thaninwards% The *!r*ose of self+en-!iry is to ma#e the @I=+tho!htmo"e inwards, towards the Self% This will ha**en a!tomati$allyas soon as yo! $ease to be interested in any of yo!r risintho!hts%

So!r$e: from boo# A8i"in by the Words of 3haa"anB, *aesCDCD%

This boo# is written by a"id .odman and it $ontains wonderf!l

a$$o!nt of 0nnamalai Swami 8ife with 4amana /aharshi, Storiesof 5ow 4amana 0shram was $onstr!$ted, 0nnamalai Swamianswers to meditation Q!estions of See#ers

If yo! are ha"in tro!ble with yo!r enth!siasm for sadhana, !sttell yo!rself, @I may be dead in se"en days=% 8et o of all the


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thins that yo! *retend are im*ortant in yo!r daily life andinstead fo$!s on the Self for twenty+fo!r ho!rs a day% o it andsee what ha**ens%

4emember that nothin that ha**ens in the mind is @yo!=, andnone of it is yo!r b!siness% &o! don=t ha"e to worry abo!t thetho!hts that rise !* inside yo!% It is eno!h that yo! rememberthat the tho!hts are not yo!%

.o dee*ly into this feelin of @I=% 3e aware of it so stronly and sointensely that no other tho!hts ha"e the enery to arise anddistra$t yo!% If yo! hold this feelin of @I= lon eno!h andstronly eno!h, the false @I= wll "anish lea"in only the

!nbro#en awareness of the real, immanent @I=, $ons$io!snessitself%%

6ontin!o!s attenti"eness will only $ome with lon *ra$ti$e% Ifyo! are tr!ly wat$hf!l, ea$h tho!ht will dissol"e at the momentthat it a**ears% 3!t to rea$h this le"el of disasso$iation yo! m!stha"e no atta$hments at all% If yo! ha"e the slihtest interest inany *arti$!lar tho!ht, it will e"ade yo!r attenti"eness, $onne$twith other tho!hts, and ta#e o"er yo!r mind for a few se$onds%This will ha**en more easily if yo! are a$$!stomed to rea$tinemotionally to a *arti$!lar tho!ht%

Self+in-!iry m!st be done $ontin!o!sly% It doesn=t wor# if yo!reard it as a *art+time a$ti"ity%

Sadhana is a battlefield% &o! ha"e to be "iilant% on=t ta#edeli"ery of wron beliefs and don=t identify with the in$omin

tho!hts that will i"e yo! *ain and s!fferin% 3!t if these thinsstart ha**enin to yo!, fiht ba$# by affirmin, @I am the Self; Iam the Self; I am the Self;=% These affirmations will lessen the*ower of the @I am the body= arrows and e"ent!ally they willarmo!r+*late yo! so s!$$essf!lly, the @I am the body= tho!hts


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that $ome yo!r way will no loner ha"e the *ower to to!$h yo!,affe$t yo! or ma#e yo! s!ffer%

If yo! $an hold on to this #nowlede @I am Self= at all times, no

f!rther *ra$ti$e is ne$essary%

There is nothin wron with loo#in at 3haa"an=s *i$t!re% It is a"ery ood *ra$ti$e% 3!t yo! sho!ld not et sidetra$#ed from yo!main obe$ti"e whi$h is establishin yo!rself as $ons$io!sness%on=t et atta$hed to states of bliss or i"e them *riority o"erthe -!est for the Self%

There are so many tho!hts in the mind% Tho!ht after tho!ht

after tho!ht% 3!t there is one tho!ht that is $ontin!o!s,tho!h it is mostly s!b+$ons$io!s: @I am the body=% This is thestrin on whi$h all other tho!hts are threaded% On$e we identifyo!rsel"es with the body by thin#in this tho!ht, maya follows% Italso follows that if we $ease to identify with the body, maya willnot affe$t !s anymore%When the ree$tion of mental a$ti"ities be$omes $ontin!o!s anda!tomati$, yo! will bein to ha"e the e)*erien$e of the Self%

0 stron determination to *!rs!e en-!iry in this way will dissol"eall do!bts% 3y -!estionin @Who am I?= and by $onstantlymeditatin, one $omes to the $larity of bein%0s lon as "asanas$ontin!e to e)ist they will rise and $o"er the reality, obs$!rinawareness of it% 0s often as yo! be$ome aware of them,-!estion, @To whom do they $ome?= This $ontin!o!s en-!iry willestablish yo! in yo!r own Self and yo! will ha"e no f!rther*roblems% When yo! #now that the sna#e of the mind ne"er

e)isted, when yo! #now that the ro*e of reality is all that e)ists,do!bts and fears will not tro!ble yo! aain%

/editation m!st be $ontin!o!s% The $!rrent of meditation m!stbe *resent in all yo!r a$ti"ities% With *ra$ti$e, meditation andwor# $an o on sim!ltaneo!sly%


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One m!st #ee* one=s attention on the Self if one wants to ma#e*roress on the s*irit!al *ath

The tho!hts that $ome and o are not yo!% Whate"er $omes

and oes is not yo!% &o!r reality is *ea$e% If yo! don=t foretthat, that will be eno!h%

3haa"an=s famo!s instr!$tion @s!mma ir!= be still( is oftenmis!nderstood% It does not mean that yo! sho!ld be *hysi$allystill; it means that yo! sho!ld always abide in the Self> In satt"a!na a state of mental -!ietness and $larity( there is stillnessand harmony% If mental a$ti"ity is ne$essary while one is insatt"a !na it ta#es *la$e% 3!t for the rest of the time there is

stillness> If satt"a !na *redominates one e)*erien$es *lea$e,bliss, $larity and an absen$e of wanderin tho!hts% That is thestillness that 3haa"an was *res$ribin%

3haa"an is always *resent, inside yo! and in front of yo!% If yo!don=t $o"er the "ision of 3haa"an with yo!r eo, that will beeno!h% The eo is the @I am the body= idea% 4emo"e this ideaand yo! shine as the Self%

When I say, @/editate on the Self= I am as#in yo! to be the Self,not thin# abo!t it% 3e aware of what remains when tho!htssto*% 3e aware of the $ons$io!sness that is the oriin of all yo!rtho!hts% 3e that $ons$io!sness%In the same way, mind is !st a Self+infli$ted area of dar#ness inwhi$h the liht of the Self has been deliberately sh!t o!t%

The mind and the body are both inert% 0ny enery or *ea$e yo!

e)*erien$e $an only $ome from the Self% ro* the identifi$ationwith the body% These e)*erien$es are ma#in yo! too body+$ons$io!s% 9!st be aware of the Self and try to *ay as littleattention as *ossible to the body% The Self is *!re enery, *!re*ower% 5old onto that%


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If yo! $an i"e !* d!ality, 3rahman alone remains, and yo!#now yo!rself to be that 3rahman, b!t to ma#e this dis$o"ery$ontin!o!s meditation is re-!ired% on=t allo$ate *eriods of timefor this% on=t reard it as somethin yo! do when yo! sit with

yo!r eyes $losed% This meditation has to be $ontin!o!s% o itwhile eatin, wal#in and e"en tal#in% It has to be $ontin!ed allthe time%

4emember that nothin that ha**ens in the mind is @yo!=, andnone of it is yo!r b!siness% &o! don=t ha"e to worry abo!t thetho!hts that rise !* inside yo!% It is eno!h that yo! rememberthat the tho!hts are not yo!%

Tay!man!"ar, a Tamil saint whom 3haa"an often -!oted,wrote in one of his *oems: @/y .!r! merely told me that I am$ons$io!sness% 5a"in heard this, I held onto $ons$io!sness%What he told me was !st one senten$e, b!t I $annot des$ribethe bliss I attained from holdin onto that one sim*le senten$e%Thro!h that one senten$e I attained a *ea$e and a ha**inessthat $an ne"er be e)*lained in words%=

In e"ery moment yo! only ha"e one real $hoi$e: to be aware ofthe Self or to identify with the body and the mind%

&o! ha"e to #ee* !* the en-!iry, @To whom is this ha**enin?=all the time% If yo! are ha"in tro!ble remind yo!rself, @This is!st ha**enin on the s!rfa$e of my mind% I am not this mind orthe wanderin tho!hts%= Then o ba$# into en-!iry @Who amI?=%3y doin this yo! will *enetrate dee*er and dee*er and be$ome

deta$hed from the mind% This will only $ome abo!t after yo!ha"e made an intense effort%


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&o!r !ltimate need is to et established in the $haneless *ea$eof the Self% 7or this yo! ha"e to i"e !* all tho!hts%

9uotes from Annamalai SwamiWhen the re1e%tion of mental a%tivities be%omes %ontinuous and automati%"

ou will begin to have the e/perien%e of the Self(

? !uoted in 0avid 8odman" Living by the Words of Bhagavan" page 5@7

Bhagavans famous instru%tion summa iru [be still] is often misunderstood(

-t does not mean that ou should be phsi%all still2 it means that ou

should alwas abide in the Self< -n sattva guna [a state of mental

!uietness and %larit] there is stillness and harmon( -f mental a%tivit is

ne%essar while one is in sattva gunait ta)es pla%e( But for the rest of the

time there is stillness< -f sattva guna predominates one e/perien%es

pea%e" bliss" %larit and an absen%e of wandering thoughts( $hat is the

stillness that Bhagavan was pres%ribing(

? !uoted in 0avid 8odman" Living by the Words of Bhagavan" page 5@6

Meditation must be %ontinuous( $he %urrent of meditation must be present
http://dharmapost.files.wordpress.com/2012/12/annamalai-swami-and-bhagavan2.jpg


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in all our a%tivities( With pra%ti%e" meditation and wor) %an go on

simultaneousl(

? !uoted in 0avid 8odman" Living by the Words of Bhagavan" page 56

When - sa" Meditate on the Self - am as)ing ou to be the Self" not thin)

about it( Be aware of what remains when thoughts stop( Be aware of the

%ons%iousness that is the origin of all our thoughts( Be that

%ons%iousness(

? !uoted in 0avid 8odman" Living by the Words of Bhagavan" page 5C5

8o deepl into this feeling of -( Be aware of it so strongl and so intensel

that no other thoughts have the energ to arise and distra%t ou( -f ou hold

this feeling of - long enough and strongl enough" the false - wll vanish

leaving onl the unbro)en awareness of the real" immanent -"

%ons%iousness itself((

? !uoted in 0avid 8odman" Living by the Words of Bhagavan" page 5DD

$he Self is alwas alert( $hat is its nature(

? !uoted in 0avid 8odman" Living by the Words of Bhagavan" page 756

ontinuous attentiveness will onl %ome with long pra%ti%e( -f ou are trul

wat%hful" ea%h thought will dissolve at the moment that it appears( But to

rea%h this level of disasso%iation ou must have no atta%hments at all( -f

ou have the slightest interest in an parti%ular thought" it will evade our

attentiveness" %onne%t with other thoughts" and ta)e over our mind for a

few se%onds( $his will happen more easil if ou are a%%ustomed to

rea%ting emotionall to a parti%ular thought(

? !uoted in 0avid 8odman" Living by the Words of Bhagavan" pages

757

Self,in!uir must be done %ontinuousl( -t doesnt wor) if ou regard it as a

part,time a%tivit(

?Annamalai Swami: Final Talks" page 7E

-f ou %an hold on to this )nowledge - am Self at all times" no further

pra%ti%e is ne%essar(

?Annamalai Swami: Final Talks" page 7D

-n the same wa" mind is 1ust a Self,infli%ted area of dar)ness in whi%h the

light of the Self has been deliberatel shut out(

?Annamalai Swami: Final Talks" page F6


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-n ever moment ou onl have one real %hoi%e: to be aware of the Self or

to identif with the bod and the mind(

?Annamalai Swami: Final Talks" page FD

3our ultimate need is to get established in the %hangeless pea%e of the

Self( >or this ou have to give up all thoughts(?Annamalai Swami: Final Talks" page @7

$aumanuvar" a $amil saint whom Bhagavan often !uoted" wrote in one of

his poems: M 8uru merel told me that - am %ons%iousness( .aving

heard this" - held onto %ons%iousness( What he told me was 1ust one

senten%e" but - %annot des%ribe the bliss - attained from holding onto that

one simple senten%e( $hrough that one senten%e - attained a pea%e and a

happiness that %an never be e/plained in words(


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consciousness. dont get attached to states of bliss or give the! priority over the #uest for

%elf. If you beco!e attached to peaceful or blissful states you !ay lose your interest in the

!ain #uest. It is good to feel blissful and peaceful but don&t indulge yourself in these states

at the epense of self in#uiry. If you reali(e the inner %elf, if you reali(e that there is not an

ato! which is apart fro! %elf, you will eperience the real peace and bliss of the %elf. Youwill be the peace or the bliss rather than being the eperiencer of it. if you eperience

te!porary states of peace or bliss in the !ind, the eperiencer of that peace or bliss will not

want to subside into the %elf and disappear.

)on&t get attached to !ental peace. *o beyond it to the real peace which co!es fro! being

the %elf

POST 2

Page + of -inal $als

Quote

hat ever ind of thought arises, have the sa!e reaction: '/ot !e, not !y business'. I$

can be a good thought or a bad thought. $reat the! the sa!e way. $o who! are these

thoughts arising 0 $o You. $hat !eans you are not the thought.

You are the %elf. 1e!ain as the %elf, and don't latch onto anything that is not the %elf.

POST 3:

Page +2: -inal $als

Quote

hatever thoughts co!e, ignore the!. You have to ignore anything that is connected to the

body!ind idea, anything that is based on the notion that you are the !ind or the body. if

you can do this, the raising of thought will not disturb or distract you. in a split second , it

will run away.

All thoughts are distractiosn, including the thought ' i a! !editating'. if you are the %elf,

darness will not overco!e you. what ever thoughts arise in that state wont affect you.

POST 4

Page +4 of final tals

Quote


26/58

%adhana, effort and practise , and any ideas you !ay have about the!, are concepts that

can only arise when you believe that you are not the %elf, and when you believe that you

have to do so!ething to reach the %elf.

5ven the se#uence 6to who! has this thought co!e0 $o !e6 is based on ignorance of the

truth. hy0 Because its verbalising a state of ignorance7 its perpetuating an erroneousassu!ption that there is a person who is having troubleso!e thoughts. You are the %elf not

so!e !aebelieve person who is having thoughts

POST 5

Page +4, -inal $als

Quote

1e!e!ber , nothing that happens to !ind is 'you', and none of it is your business. You dont

have to worry about thoughts that rise up inside you.Its enough that you re!e!ber that

the thoughts are not you.

POST 6:

Page +2 : -inal $als

Quote

$houghts will co!e as long as the potential for the! is inside you. *ood thoughts, bad

thoughts, they will eep co!ing.

$here is nothing you can do about this flow, but at the sa!e ti!e, this flow of thoughts

need not be a proble!. Be the %elf, be the peace that is your real nature, and it will not

!atter what co!es up.

Post 7:

Page 484: living by the words of Bhagavan

Quote


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*iving up the identity with the body and the !ind is tapas, sa!adhi, dhyana and nishta.

%piritual seeers have a very strange habit: they are always looing for a way to reach,

attain,discover,eperience, or reali(e the %elf. $hey try !any things because they cannot

co!prehend that they are already the %elf. $his is lie running around looing for one's

eyes with one's own eyes.hy should you i!agine that it is so!e new eperience to be discovered or found 0 You are

the %elf right now, and you are aware of it right now. )o you need a new eperience to

prove that you eist0 $he feeling 6I a! eisting6 is the %elf. You pretend that you are not

eperiencing it, or cover it up with all inds of false ideas, and then you run around looing

for it as if it were so!ething eternal to be reached or found. $here is a story about

so!eone lie thus.

9nce a ing i!agined that he was a povertystrien peasant. e thought , 6if I go and !eet

the ing he !ay be able to help !e by giving so!e !oney6

e searched for the ing in !any places but he could not find hi! anywhere. ;lti!ately hebeca!e very depressed because his search was not yeilding any results. 9ne day he !et a

!an on the road who ased hi! why he was so depressed.

e answered, 6 I a! searching for the ing. I thin that he can solve all !y proble!s and

!ae !e happy but I cant find hi! anywhere6.

$he !an, who already recogni(ed hi!, said with so!e astonish!ent, 6But you yourself as

the ing


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as long as one is not able to do self in#uiry properly or constantly.

Bhagavan said, '=eeping the !ind in the heart is selfen#uiry'. If you cannot do thys by

asing 6who a! I06 or by taing the 6I6thought bac to its source, then !editation on the

awareness 6I a! the all pervasive %elf6 is a great aid.

Bhagavan often siad that we should read and study the 1ibhu *ita regularly.In 1ibhu *ita its said: 6$hat Bhavana 6I a! not the body, I a! not the !ind, I a!

Brah!an, I a! everything6 is to be repeated again and again until it beco!es natural state.

Bhagavan sat with us every day while we chanted etracts fro! 1ibhu *ita which affir! the

reality of the %elf. Its true that he said that these repetitions are only an aid to selfen#uiry,

but they are very powerful aids.

By practising this way the !ind beco!es !ore and !ore attuned to the reality. hen the

!ind has beco!e purified by this practise its easier to tae it bac to the source and eep it

there. when one is able to abide in the %elf directly, one does not need aids lie this. But ifthis is not possible these practises can definitely aid.

POST 9

Quote

&ow to gi!e up this false idea that mind is real '

Anna!alai %wa!i Answers: the sa!e way that you give up any wrong idea. you si!ply stop

believing in it. if this does not happen spontaneously when u hear the truth fro! a teacher,

eep telling yourself 6i a! not the !ind, i a! not the !ind. $here is no !ind7 there is no

!ind. consciousness alone eists6. if you have fir! conviction that this is the truth, one day

this fir! conviction will !ature to the point where it becoe!s your direct eperience.

POST 10:

>iving by the ords of Bhagavan , pg 4+?


29/58

Quote

If you try to !editate without understanding that your real nature is %elf, and %elf alone,

your !editation practise will only lead you to !ore !ental bondage.

Bhagavan once said, '$o eep the !ind in the %elf, all you have to do is re!ain still'

$o reali(e the %elf you dont actually have to do anything ecept be still. @ust give up theidentifying with the !ind and hold onto the %elf. $hat is enough. Be still and cultivate the

awareness 'I a! the %elf7the %elf is all'. hat difficulties can arise fro! doing a si!ple

practise lie this 0

POST 11:

Pg 4+4 of >iving by the words of Bhagavan

Quote)oing any sadhana without first understanding that the individual self is noneistent is self

indulgence. Its a for! of spiritual entertain!ent in which the illusory 6I6 plays ga!es with

itself.

%aint $ayu!anuvar once said,'hy all these !aha yogas 0 All these yogas are !aya


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POST 12

pg 4 , of living by the words of bhagavan

Quote

$he best !antra is 6i a! the self, everything is !y %elf. 5verything is one6 If you eep this

in your !ind all the ti!e, %elf will eventually reveal itself to you.

)ont be statisfied with rituals and other indergarten techni#ues. If you are serious, head

directly for the self. old onto it as tenaciously as you can and dont let anything or anyone

loosen your grip.

POST 13:

Pg 42C of >iving by the words of Bhagavan

Quote

You !ust generate the conviction, 6I a! the allpervasive consciousness in which all bodes

and !inds in the world are appearing and disappearing. I a! that consciousness which

re!ains unchanged and unaffected by these appearances and disappearances 6. %tabilise

yourself in that conviction. $hats all you need to do.

Post 14:

>iving by the words of bhagavan , conversations

Quote

Q.: What is the easiest way to be free of the %little self%'

Anna!alai %wa!i: %top identifying with it. If you can convince yourself, '$his little self is

not really !e,' it will disappear.

Q.: But how to do that'

A%.: $he little self is so!ething that only appears to be real. If you understand that it has

no real eistence it will disappear, leaving behind it the eperience of the real and only %elf.


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;nderstand that it has no real eistence and it will stop troubling you.

Donsciousness is universal. $here is no li!itation or 'little self' in it. It is only when we

identify with and li!it ourselves to the body and the !ind that this false sense of self is

born. If, through en#uiry, you go to the source of the 'little self', you find that it dissolves

into nothingness.

Q.: But I am !ery austomed to feel %I am this %little self% %. I annot break this habit merely

by thinking %I am not this %little self%%.

A%.: $his 'little self' will only give way to the real %elf if you !editate constantly. You cannot

wish it away with a few stray thoughts. $ry to re!e!ber the analogy of the rope which

loos lie a snae in twilight. If you see the rope as snae the real nature of the rope is

hidden fro! you. If you only see the rope the snae is not there. /ot only that you now

that there never was a snae there. E$henF the #uestion of how to ill the snae

disappears... If you can understand that this 'little self' never at any ti!e had any eistenceoutside your i!agination, you will not be concerned about ways and !eans of getting rid of

it.

Q.: It is all !ery lear but I feel I need some help. I am not sure that i an generate this

on!ition by myself.A%.: $he desire for assistance is part of your proble!. )on't !ae the !istae of i!agining

that there is a goal to be reached or attained. If you thin lie this you will start looing for!ethods to practice and people to help you. $his "ust perpetuates the proble! you are

trying to end. Instead, cultivate the strong awareness, 'I a! the %elf. I a! $hat. I a!Brah!an. I a! everything.'.. $he best way to Estop believing the wrong ideas about

yourselfF is to replace the! with ideas which !ore accurately reflect the real state of affairs.

...$he %elf is always attained, it is always reali(ed7 it is not so!ething that you have to see,reach or discover. Your vasanas and all the wrong ideas you have about yourself are

blocing and hiding the eperience of the real %elf. If you don't identify with these wrongideas, your %elfnature will not be hidden fro! you.

POST 15:

9: 3ou sa that everthing is the Self" even maa( -f this is so" wh %ant - see the Self%learl & -f this is so" wh %ant - see the Self %learl &Wh is it hidden from me &

AS: Be%ause ou are loo)ing in the wrong dire%tion( 3ou have the idea that the Self issomething that ou see or e/perien%e ( $his is not so( $he Self is the Awareness or%ons%iousness in whi%h the seeing and the e/perien%ing ta)e pla%e(*ven if ou dont see the Self" the Self is still there( Bhagavan some times remar)edhumorousl: GHeople 1ust open a newspaper and glan%e through it( $hen the sau " - haveseen the paper( But reall the havent seen the paper " the have onl seen the letterswithout the paper" but people alwas forget the paper while the are reading the words G


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Bhagavan would then use this analog to show that while people see the names and formsthat appear on the s%reen of %ons%iousness" the ignore the s%reen itself( With this )ind ofpartial vision its eas to %ome to the %on%lusion that all forms are un%onne%ted with ea%hother and separate from the peron who sees them( -f people were to be aware of the%ons%iousness instead of the forms that appear in it" the would realiIe that all forms are

1ust appearan%es whi%h manifest within the one invisible %ons%iousness(

$hat %ons%iousness is the Self that ou are loo)ing for( 3ou %an be that %ons%iousness butou %an never see it be%ause its not something that is separate from ou(

Hg: 5@F,@ of Annamalai Swami s living b the words of bhagavan($his is %alled Re%ognition(

POST 16:pg 56J,5" 4iving b the words of bhagavan

ontinuous inhalation and e/halation are ne%essar for %ontinuation of life( ontinuousmeditation is ne%essar for all those who want to sta in the Self(

3ou divide our life up into different a%tivities: G- am eatingG" G- am meditatingG" G- amwor)ingG" et%( -f ou have ideas li)e these ou are still identifiing with the bod( 8et rid ofall these ideas and repla%e them with the single thought " G- am SelfG" .old onto that ideaand dont let it go( 0ont give these G- am the bodG ideas an attention(G- must eat nowG" G- will go to sleep nowG" G- will have a bath nowG" all thoughts li)e these are- am the bod thoughts( 4earn to re%ogniIe them when the arise and learn to ignore themor den them( Sta firml seated in the Self and dont allow the mind to identif with anthingthat the bod does(

POST 17

.ere is a %onversation between annamalai swami and Ramana " pg 57 of 4iving b thewords of bhagavan(9uoteG0oes Samadhi mean that one is unaware of everthing &G " - as)ed(GKo"G said Bhagavan( GMediation will go on without our effort( $hat is SamadhiGG$hen what is Saha1a Samadhi &G" - as)ed(Bhagavan answered b saing " G -n that state meditation will alwas be going on( -n thatState the thought " - am meditating or - am not meditating will not o%%urG(

- then as)ed Bhagavan about periods in meditation when - was onl aware of an all,pervasive blan)ness(GSometimes nothing is seenG" - said( G-s this good&G

Bhagavan did not seem to approve of all these states" G-n the beginningG" he said" G-t is goodif meditators meditate with Self AwarenessG(

$he state of Saha1a Samadhi %ontined to intrigue me( A few wee)s later - as)ed himanother !uestion about it" Gan one pra%tise saha1a samadhi right from the beginning&GBhagavan replied b saing that one %ould(GBut how to pra%tise it G" - as)ed( GAnd how does one pra%tise nirvi)alpa samadhi & .owman different )inds of samadhi are there &G


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G$here is onl one )ind of SamadhiG" Said Bhagavan " Gnot man )inds( $o remaintemporaril subsided in the realit without an thought is nirvi)alpa Samadhi( Hermanentlabiding in the Self without forgetting it is Saha1a Samadhi( Both will give the samehappinessG

Host JC:

$his is >rom living b the words of bhagavan :

Hage 5@6" %onversations with Annamalai Swami

9uoteKothing %an %ause bondage for the =nani be%ause his mind is dead( -n the absen%e of mindhe )nows himself onl as %ons%iousness( Be%ause the mind is dead" he is no longer able toidentif himself with the bod( But even though he )nows that he is not the bod" its a fa%tthat the bod is still alive( $hat bod will %ontinue to live" and the =nani will %ontinue to beaware of it" until its own )arma is e/hausted( Be%ause the 1nani is aware of the bod" he willalso be aware of the thoughts and vasanas that arise in that bod( Kone of these vasanashas the power to %ause bondage for him be%ause he never identifies with them" but the do

have the power to ma)e the bod behave in %ertain was( $he bod of the 1nani en1os ande/perien%es thses vasanas although the 1nani himself is not affe%ted b them( that is wh itssome times said that for the 1nani there are bhoga vasanas but no bandha vasanas(

$he bhoga vasanas differ from 1nani to 1nani( some 1nanis ma a%%umulate wealth" somema sit in silen%e2 some ma stud the sastras while others ma remain illiterate2 some maget married and raise families but others ma be%ome %elibate mon)s( it is the bhogavasanas whi%h determine the )ind of lifestle a 1nani will lead( $he 1nani is aware of the%onse!uen%es of these vasanas without identifing with them( Be%ause of this he never fallsba%) into samsara again(

$he vasanas arise be%ause of habits and pra%ti%es of previous life times( that is wh thediffer from 1nani to 1nani( When vasanas rise in ordinar people who still identif with thebod and the mind" the %ause li)es and disli)es( some vasanas are embra%ed wholeheartedl while others are re1e%ted as being undesirable( $hese li)es and disli)es generatedesires and fears whi%h in turn produ%e more )arma( while ou are still ma)ing 1udgementsabout what is good and what is bad" ou are identifing with the mind and ma)ing new)armas for ourself( when new )arma has been %reated li)e this" it means that ou have tota)e another birth to en1o it(

$he 1nanis bod %arries out all the a%ts whi%h are destined for it( But be%ause the 1nanima)es no 1udgements about what is good or bad" and be%ause he has no li)es and disli)es"he is not %reating an new )arma for himself( be%ause he )nows that he is not the bod" he

%an witness all its a%tivities without getting involved in them in an wa( $here will be norebirth for the 1nani be%ause on%e the mind has been destroed" there is no possibilit ofan new )arma being %reated(

POST 19:

Annamalai Swami pg 5 of >inal $al)s


34/58

9uote*verthing we see in this wa)ing state is a dream( $hese dreams are our thoughts mademanifest( Bad thoughts ma)e bad dreams and good thoughts ma)e good dreams" and ifou have no thoughts " ou dont dream at all( But even if ou do dream" ou mustunderstand that our dream is also the Self( 3ou dont have to supress thoughts or beabsolutel thoughtless to abide as the S*lf( -f ou )now that even our wa)ing and sleepingdreams are the Self" then the thoughts and the dreams the produ%e %an do on( $he willnot be a problem for ou an more( =ust be the Self at all times( -n this state ou will )nowthat everthing that appears to ou is 1ust a dream(

in pg 5F" he further e/plains:

9uote

$he wa)ing state whi%h ou ta)e to be real" is 1ust an unfolding of dream that has appearedto ou and minifested in front of ou on a%%ount of some hidden desires or fears( 3ourvasanas sprout and e/pand mira%ulousl " %reating a whole wa)ing,dream world for ou(See it as a dream( Re%ogniIe that it is 1ust an e/pansion of our thoughts( 0ont lose sight of

the Self" the substratum on whi%h this vast believable dream is pro1e%ted( -> ou hold ontothe )nowledge G- am SelfG" ou will )now that the dreams are laso the Self" and ou wontget entangled in them(

H;S$ 5E:

When the mind appears ever morning dont 1ump to the usual %on%lusion" G$his is me2these thoughts are mine(G -nstead" wat%h these thoughts %ome and go without identifingwith them in an wa( -f ou %an resist the impulse to %laim ea%h and ever thought as ourown" ou will %ome to a startling %on%lusion: ou will dis%over that ou are the%ons%iousness in whi%h the thoughts appear and disappear( 3ou are allowed to run free(

4i)e the sna)e whi%h appears in the rope" ou will dis%over that the mind is onl an illusionwhi%h appears through ignoran%e or misper%eption(

3ou want some e/perien%e whi%h will %onvin%e ou that what - am saing is true( 3ou %anhave that e/perien%e if ou give up our life,long habit of inventing an - whi%h %laims allthoughts as mine( Be %ons%ious of ourself as %ons%iousness alone" wat%h all the thoughts%ome and go( ome to the %on%lusion" b dire%t e/perien%e" that ou are reall%ons%iousness itself" not its ephemeral %ontents(

louds %ome and go in the s) but the appearan%e and disappearan%e of the %loudsdoesnt affe%t the s)( 3our real nature is li)e the s)" li)e spa%e( =ust remain li)e the s)

and let thought,%louds %ome and go( -f ou %ultivate this attitude of indifferen%e towards themind" graduall ou will %ease to identif ourself with it


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Annamalai Swami- Speaks onSexuality

Annamalai Swami is an 2is)i#le o 'aman (aharshi. 3hen Annamalai Swami was sta!ing atthe Ashram o Sri 'aman (aharshi, he was given )harge o )onstru)ting more buildings or theAshram.

Annamalai Swami was some times troubled b! seual thoughts but some how he used to avoid

the thoughts.

Amongst the )onstru)tion wor"ers there were some ver! attra)tive emales and o))asionall!,Annamalai Swami were attra)ted to them. 4n)e he e#elled all the emale wor"ers so that he )an

avoid them. &ut 'aman (aharshi stressed him to em#lo! them.

4n)e he told 'amana (aharshi that he doesn-t want (o"sha but he wants to get rid o the desireor women.

'aman (aharshi laughingl! said 5all saints are striving onl! or this. *rom 'aman (aharshianswer, Annamalai Swami was assured that he was not alone in this suering.

&ut one aternoon Annamalai Swami was sitting in his room, when he saw a beautiul woman

going to meet 'aman (aharshi. Ater some time when that woman )ame out o room,

Annamalai Swami was totall! )a#tivated b! her beaut! and lust.

Suddenl! 'aman (aharshi )ame out and as"ed Annamalai Swami to stand on a #arti)ular ro)"

and (aharshi started )onversing with him.

The sun was at its #ea" and Annamalai Swami was not wearing an! sandals. So soon his eet

starts burning rom heat but he )ould not )hange his eet as it was an order rom (aharshi.

The #ain in his eet started in)reasing and suddenl! a thought arises in him that the #ain he ise#erien)ing has re#la)ed the seual desire. As the thought entered his mind, 'amana (aharshi

abru#tl! ended )onversation and let him.

Ater some da!s Annamalai Swami was again disturbed b! seual thoughts to the etent that he

)ould not eat or slee# #ro#erl! or three da!s. At last he thought o ta"ing (aharshi-s hel#.

(aharshi advised him 53h! !ou #a! attention to evil thought7 3h! don-t !ou meditate7 To

whom does this thought )ame. The thought will leave !ou on its own a))ord. 8ou are not the

bod! nor the mind, !ou are the Sel, (editate on !our Sel and all desires will leave !ou.


36/58

Anna!alai %wa!i: Initially, abidance in the %elf !ay not be

fir! and irreversible. Gigilance !ay be needed to !aintain it.

$here is a verse in (ai!alya )a!aneeta that Bhagavan often

#uoted. It speas of the need for vigilance even after the %elfhas been eperienced for the first ti!e. In this verse the

disciple is speaing to his *uru:

'>ord, you are the reality re!aining as !y in!ost %elf, ruling!e during all !y countless incarnations< *lory to you who have

put on an eternal for! to instruct !e. I do not see how I can

repay your grace for having liberated !e. *lory< *lory to yourholy feet


37/58

co!es to the clarity of being.

As long as !asanascontinue to eist they will rise and cover

the reality, obscuring awareness of it. As often as you beco!e

aware of the!, #uestion, '$o who! do they co!e0' $hiscontinuous en#uiry will establish you in your own %elf and you

will have no further proble!s. hen you now that the snae

of the !ind never eisted, when you now that the rope of

reality is all that eists, doubts and fears will not trouble youagain.

K Anna!alai %wa!i, *inal Talks, edited by )avid *od!an


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wanderin, always see#in it, thin#in in inoran$e it is

somethin a*art from !s% This is li#e a *erson sayin with his

own ton!e that he has no ton!e%

Q%: If that is so, why did so many sadhanas $ome to be $reated?

3haa"an: The sadhanas $ame to be formed only to et rid of

the tho!ht that the Self is somethin to be newly attained% The

root of the ill!sion is the tho!ht whi$h inores the Self and

thin#s instead, 'I am this body'% 0fter this tho!ht rises ite)*ands in a moment into se"eral tho!sand tho!hts and

$on$eals the Self% The reality of the Self will only shine if all

these tho!hts are remo"ed% 0fterwards, what remains is only

3rahmananda, the bliss of 3rahman%

Q%: I am now sittin *ea$ef!lly witho!t the tho!ht 'I am this

body'% Is this the state of reality?

3haa"an: This state m!st remain as it is witho!t any $hane%

If it $hanes after a while yo! will #now that other tho!hts

ha"e not one%

Q%: What is the way to et rid of other tho!hts?

3haa"an: They $an only be remo"ed thro!h the *owerf!l

effe$t of the en-!iry, 'To whom ha"e these tho!hts $ome'


39/58


40/58

not li#e this and said that if I "a$ated he wo!ld not stay at the 0shram% It wasthen areed that the two of !s wo!ld share the room%

This is how I be$ame "ery friendly with 6hadwi$#% 5e a**re$iated my hard wor#and sin$erity% I e"en !sed to learn a little bit of Enlish from 6hadwi$#%

6hadwi$# a"e me an !mbrella, shaded eyelasses and sandals to !se when Iwas s!*er"isin or wor#in in the hot s!n% On$e, when 3haa"an $ame by, Itried to remo"e all three% Then 3haa"an $ame near me and $hided me, sayin,2If yo! beha"e li#e this on seein me, I will ne"er $ome near yo!%2 The irony isthat some others in the 0shram !sed to s$off at me for wearin these in3haa"an's *resen$e% I was in a dilemma be$a!se it was 3haa"an who insistedthat I beha"e normally, or 5e wo!ld not $ome near me%

If yo! ot !* from yo!r seat when 3haa"an *assed by, 5e wo!ldn't be ha**yand wo!ld say, 2So yo! are showin off yo!r bha#ti% Why not beha"e normallye"en when I $ome%2

Construction Work

I #new nothin abo!t masonry wor# before $omin here% 0ltho!h my fatherwas *rofi$ient in masonry, s$!l*t!re, astroloy and other fine arts, I #new noneof these when I $ame to 3haa"an% 3haa"an ta!ht me e"erythin%

One day, Thenamma 1aati as#ed 3haa"an how I $o!ld a**ly my mind tos!*er"ise all the $onstr!$tion wor# that was oin on and still be de"oted to3haa"an% 3haa"an la!hed and remar#ed that I sho!ld ha"e been anenineer in my *re"io!s birth%

It was in "ery s!btle ways that 3haa"an e)tra$ted wor# from the de"otees%!rin my early days with 3haa"an, he on$e told me, 2.o and see what themason is doin%2 So I went there, as#ed him what he was doin and $on"eyedthe re*ly to 3haa"an% 0fter sometime, 3haa"an aain as#ed me to o and seewhat the mason was doin% I $om*lied% The mason was a little annoyed, b!tmade the same re*ly% When 3haa"an as#ed me to o and see what the masonwas doin for the third time, the mason tho!ht that 3haa"an was mad as hewas !st as#in him the same -!estion aain and aain% I now as#ed 3haa"anwhy he #e*t re*eatin the same -!estion% That is when he $ame o!t with hisintentions and said, %Someone $an attend to the wor# here% &o! o and

s!*er"ise that wor#%2 I refle$ted that 3haa"an $o!ld ha"e told me this in thefirst instan$e itself, or !st ordered me to o and do it% 3!t that wasn't3haa"an's way% 5e was "ery s!btle, shy, and "ery entle% 3haa"an wo!ldindi$ate with only a few words or sins%

3haa"an !sed to say, 2This whole *la$e is oin to be "ery a$ti"e with manyb!ildins%2 Some of 5is $omments were hard to belie"e be$a!se no indi$ation ofs!$h thins was fo!nd then%


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When the storeroom was bein b!ilt, 3haa"an wanted me to ma#e an imae of0r!na$hala in $ement% I honestly felt that I was o"erwor#ed, not ettin eno!hrest% 0lso, I was feelin a little dee$ted% 0 little later, 3haa"an $ame ba$# andsaid, 2I tho!ht I $o!ld ma#e that re-!est, b!t if that's diffi$!lt for yo!, don'tbother with it%2 I felt badly abo!t the tho!hts I had entertained and resol"edthat in the f!t!re I wo!ld definitely !nderta#e and f!lfill any of 3haa"an'sre-!ests, e"en if that sho!ld mean sa$rifi$in my body% It was a solemn *lede Imade to myself%

3haa"an was "ery *arti$!lar abo!t doin thins meti$!lo!sly and *erfe$tly% Onall $!*boards and other f!rnit!re, the name 2Sri 4amanasramam,Tir!"annamalai2 had to be written "ery neatly, !st li#e *rinted letters%

3haa"an insisted that I sho!ld draw the imae of 0r!na$hala on the wall of the0shram Store% When it did not $ome o!t *ro*erly, 3haa"an $ame andinstr!$ted me% 5owe"er, it did not $ome o!t the se$ond time as well% 3haa"anon$e aain a"e me a few hints and I manaed to et it riht the third time, and

it $an be seen at the store entran$e e"en today% The three dimensional as*e$t isalso "isible on a$$o!nt of the $ement bein *lastered a$$ordinly% The samethin ha**ened with the ar$h of the 0shram entran$e% 3haa"an wo!lden$o!rae me to ta#e !* s!$h wor#, and whene"er I had diffi$!lty, 3haa"anwo!ld $ome, i"e hints, and en$o!rae me to do it *erfe$tly%

One day I was feelin tired and was re$linin aainst a wall% 3haa"an $ame !*to me and said, 2I'm afraid to e"en loo# at yo!%2 I as#ed 5im why that sho!ld beso% 5e said, 2If I wo!ld !st loo# in one dire$tion, yo! wo!ld $onstr!$t a str!$t!rethere%2 This was of $o!rse in est b!t it also meant that I $o!ld !nderstand3haa"an's s!btle instr!$tions and follow them meti$!lo!sly% This was reat

a**re$iation showered !*on me by Sri 3haa"an%

On$e I was abo!t to $onstr!$t some ste*s when 3haa"an $ame and hit methree times% I had been as#ed to re*air some dila*idated ste*s behind theinin 5all% In those days money and materials were s$ar$e% I as#ed4amaswami 1illai to et three or fo!r meas!res of $ement% Now, in Tamil, theword '*adi' stands for both 'meas!re' as well as for 'ste*s'% 3haa"an as#ed me,25ow many *adis?2 meanin how many ste*s I was $onstr!$tin% I tho!ht hewanted to #now how many meas!res of $ement I was orderin% 3haa"an a"eme a *layf!l sla* and said, 2I'm as#in abo!t one *adi, and yo! are answerinabo!t another%2

On another o$$asion, I was b!ildin some ste*s near the water ta*% 3haa"anwas standin there and i"in me instr!$tions% 0s I ot !*, I baned my headhard aainst the ta*% 3haa"an as#ed /adha"aswami to brin


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In the earlier days, /adha"aswami, 4anaswami and I !sed to massae thesoles of 3haa"an's feet with oil, and *!t o!r heads aainst 5is feet to re$ei"e5is ra$e after $om*letin the massae% 3haa"an !sed to *retend to be aslee*when we did this% 5owe"er, when lare $rowds started $omin to the 0shramre!larly, we had to sto* this *ra$ti$e of o!rs%

When the inin 5all was bein b!ilt, 3haa"an !sed to di the earth with ah!e adda*are $rowbarJ and Santhamma !sed to mi) mortar with water% Iwas entr!sted with the mason's wor#% While we wor#ed on the $onstr!$tionThenamma and S!bb!+la#shmiamma !sed to do the $oo#in nearby% 0s I wasnot a brahmin, the women !sed a lare white $loth as a *artition between themand !s% 3haa"an told them, 2Why are yo! doin this? It's only o!r 0nnamalai%Why sho!ld yo! sereate him li#e this?2 6hinnaswami, on hearin this said,23haa"an says 'o!r 0nnamalai', so he has be$ome an i$h$ha brahmin2, i%e%, abrahmin by the wish of Sri 3haa"an%

Disturbing Ants

One day after l!n$h we noti$ed lots of ants in the Old 5all dist!rbin thede"otees% 3haa"an as#ed me to ins*e$t the area and do the needf!l% When Iwent and lifted a stone, millions of ants r!shed o!t% I was !m*in all o"er inorder to a"oid $r!shin them% When 3haa"an as#ed me what I was doin, Ie)*lained that it wo!ld be i"ahimsa to #ill h!ndreds and tho!sands of ants byste**in !*on them or by $losin the o*enin thro!h whi$h they $ame o!t% 5esaid, 2&o! are not doin it for yo!rself, it is for the sa#e of others%2 5e then-!oted from 6ha*ter thirteen of 3haa"ad .ita where Krishna says that e"en#illin is *ermitted if it is for the benefit of the world% U*on hearin this, I $learedthe area of ants, sealed the entran$e and $emented it%

In the days when I still !sed to li"e in the 0shram, I on$e told 3haa"an that Ididn't e"en desire mo#sha, b!t !st wanted to be sa"ed from the attra$tions ofwomen% I was wonderin what re*ly 3haa"an wo!ld i"e% 5e said that it wasfreedom from this desire that all reat *eo*le had so!ht and s!ffered for%

leeing to !olur

3haa"an always ta!ht nanamara, yet when we went o!t, no one e"er tal#edabo!t nanamara or e"en bha#timara% 0nd sin$e at that time I felt that

whate"er bha#ti I had, had e"a*orated, I was feelin that 3haa"an did notwant me to stay there%


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I wal#ed witho!t any food for two days, and was wea# and e)ha!sted by thetime I rea$hed 1ol!r% I beed at Nair /analam's *la$e and many other *la$eswith no l!$#% None wished to i"e me alms% In fa$t one *erson wondered why Ihad to lea"e a holy *la$e li#e Tir!"annamalai and wander elsewhere% 0ll thesee"ents dis$o!raed me% I had heard that if one stood $hest dee* in water, itwo!ld aid in withstandin h!ner% I did that in a tan# !st o!tside 1ol!r for awhile before lea"in for the samadhi of ithoba in 1ol!r% In the afternoon on thethird day, a lady too# *ity at my *liht and offered me two lasses f!ll of thinr!el% This hel*ed me reain some of my strenth%

I then *l!$#ed a little flower in order to toss it !* to di"ine if I sho!ld o ba$# tothe 0shram or lea"e 3haa"an *ermanently and o o!t as a wanderinmendi$ant% The flower toss+!* indi$ated that I sho!ld o ba$# to 3haa"an and Ibean wal#in ba$# *rom*tly% That's when the owner of a small roadside hotelin"ited me in and fed me s!m*t!o!sly with reat re"eren$e% 3esides, he alsoa"e me two r!*ees for my tra"el e)*enses% I too# this as a ood omen and a"indi$ation of my de$ision to ret!rn to 3haa"an%

I boarded the train to Tir!"annamalai witho!t a ti$#et% 5owe"er, while the ti$#ete)aminer $he$#ed all other *asseners, he totally inored me% Similarly, when I

ot down at Tir!"annamalai, the stationmaster, who !s!ally $he$#s all theti$#ets, let me thro!h sayin that he had already $he$#ed my ti$#et% I wentstraiht to 3haa"an and narrated all that had ha**ened% 3haa"an ra$io!slysaid, 25ow $o!ld yo! o away? &o! ha"e so m!$h wor# to do here, and !nlessthat is finished, how $o!ld yo! o?2

I was standin near 3haa"an and 5e a"e me a steady loo# of .ra$e% I felt that3haa"an was -!otin the son from the s!**lement to the forty "erses whi$h


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means 2When yo! ha"e the asso$iation of reat men, where is the need forfollowin the !s!al in!n$tions e)*e$ted of a see#er, li#e oin on a yatra,remainin? in mo!na, et$%2 This son $ame to my mind, tho!h 3haa"an hadnot !ttered a word% That a"e me reat $onfiden$e and I de$lared in the*resen$e of 3haa"an that I wo!ld stay *!t and do whate"er 3haa"an as#ed ofme% 3haa"an smiled at me, and a"e me another loo# of .ra$e%

There are many instan$es when 3haa"an showered ra$e by his loo#% Onseein this Si"alina tied to my left arm, 3haa"an re*eatedly said, 2&o! ha"ethe 8ord tied to yo!r hand% What more do yo! want?2

It was my father who had this 8ina tied to my arm% The Tamil reliio!s $alendarsays that, !*on risin e"ery mornin one sho!ld loo# at the s!n in one's rihthand, and at a 8ina in the left% 0s I was interested in followin this in!n$tion, itwas s!ested that I $o!ld ha"e a 8ina tattooed on my hand% 3!t my father*referred a 8ina itself to be tied to my left hand% 3haa"an !sed to re*eatedlytell me, 2.od is in yo!r own hands% What short$omins $an yo! fa$e in yo!r

life?2

Animals

3haa"an was e)traordinarily #ind towards birds, s-!irrels, $ows, dos and*ea$o$#s% In fa$t, 5e showed "isible *artiality towards animals o"er h!mans%

On$e a bi do"e fell down on bein atta$#ed by a "!lt!re% 3haa"an *ersonallyattended to the bird and treated it with


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o"er 5is body% 3haa"an !nderwent s!$h s!fferin e"en for animals% We allha"e witnessed these *hases in 3haa"an's life%

Moving to !alakottu

I mo"ed to 1ala#ott! d!rin the time when the inin 5all was bein b!ilt !ndermy s!*er"ision% One day &oi 4amaya was a$$om*anyin 3haa"an and toldhim that I had be$ome "ery wea# from so m!$h hard wor#, and that I sho!ld bereleased from this strain% 3haa"an also said, 2&es, yes, he sho!ld be i"enfreedom%2

4esol"in to *!t an end to the tension and mental s!fferin, I went !* the hill tomeet 3haa"an and re-!ested *ermission to stay in 1ala#ott!% 3haa"an said,2&es, &es, that's ood for yo!,2 and he re*eated it thri$e%

0 little later I went into the bathroom when 3haa"an was bein i"en an oil

bath% /adha"aswami, 5is attendant, remar#ed that many sadh!s are #nown tota#e ana hem*J and as#ed him how one wo!ld feel on $ons!min ana%3haa"an then s!ddenly ot !* and holdin me by the sho!lder, said, 2It willonly be li#e this%2 I felt s!$h a reat oy when he held me that I handed o"er the#eys of my room to 3haa"an immediately and left for 1ala#ott!%

When I left the 0shram, I had no tho!hts abo!t where I wo!ld stay, or what Iwo!ld do for food% /!naala en#atramaiah a"e me shelter at 1ala#ott! and I$oo#ed my own food% 3haa"an !sed to o$$asionally in-!ire abo!t my $oo#inand made en$o!rain $omments% 7or instan$e, if I told him that I made !stone sambhar, he wo!ld say, 2OhoL one sambharL That's "ery ood%2 On$e when Ihad more than one eatable to offer 3haa"an, he remar#ed, 29!st li#e0nnamalai, 0nnanamalayar has /anda"a*adi%2 3haa"an was $om*arin hisre$ei"in food at the 0shram, as well as at other *la$es, to the idol of 0nnamalaiin the 0r!na$haleswara Tem*le, whi$h sto*s at ea$h /anda* and is offeredfood% 3haa"an had $ome to this *la$e and e"en had some food $oo#ed by me%

MF++ m*%C ++

"o Desires# "o Sorrow

"e who has no desires has no sorrow%(#t where there is desireThere will be ever)increasing sorrows.*hen desire% sorrow+s sorrow% dies awa!%,nd!ing bliss prevails% even here on earth.-t is the nat#re of desire never to be f#lfilled%(#t he who #tterl! gives it #p realies/ternal 0#lfillment at that ver! moment.


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Whene"er I was enaed in $onstr!$tion wor# at the 0shram or at 1ala#ott!,3haa"an wo!ld ins*e$t my wor# and instr!$t me% On$e 3haa"an "isited mewhen I was remo"in the s$affoldin from my ho!se, as I $o!ld not $om*lete the$onstr!$tion for want of money% When I told 3haa"an the reason, he said,2OhoL So yo! ha"e to remo"e this s$affoldin for the sa#e of money?2 and wentaway% That same e"enin, a lady $ame from 4amaswami, stayed here for amonth, and donated 4s%FHH% This ho!se was $om*leted with that money, alonwith hel* from ai#!nta"asaar%

I shall tell yo! the story of how this ho!se was desined% /y friend 0r!m!hamand I were *lannin to b!ild a small that$hed shed for me to li"e in% 3haa"anheard o!r dis$!ssions from afar and in-!ired abo!t o!r *lans from 0r!m!ham%5e then as#ed many leadin -!estions related to the desin of the ho!se% 2Willyo! !se mortar, lime, bri$#s, et$%?2 he as#ed% 2Will the ho!se ha"e an !**erfloor? Will there be a mortared to*?2 et$% Th!s, witho!t sayin so e)*li$itly,3haa"an $on"eyed to 0r!m!ham the desin he had in mind for my ho!se%0r!m!ham settled for that "ery *lan and bo!ht HHH bri$#s the ne)t day,

alon with lime+ma#in e-!i*ment for a small lime fa$tory% This loo# of3haa"an made 0r!m!ham a bi $ontra$tor years later%

Do "ot Move $ut

One day 5e told me "ery $learly and sternly% 2on't mo"e o!t anywhere% Stay*!t here and don't mo"e to the ne)t ho!se or e"en the ne)t room%2

0fter mo"in to 1ala#ott! I !sed to $ome to 3haa"an e"ery day at aro!nd eihtat niht, after dinner, whi$h was ser"ed at D:H, and stay till abo!t G:HH o'$lo$#%

One niht I saw 3haa"an $om*letely en$losed in a *ie$e of $loth, e)$e*t forthe nose% I !sed to $on"erse freely with 3haa"an, li#e a son with his father% Ias#ed him, 2oes this mean that yo! do not li#e to meet me here, or is it thatyo! don't want me to $ome to the 0shram at all?2 3haa"an remained silent% 0tabo!t G o'$lo$# I left the 5all% I was nearin the arden thin#in abo!t3haa"an's dire$ti"e to me to stay *!t at 1ala#ott! when I heard 5im $all me%5e be$#oned me to him and said in a "ery stron and stern "oi$e, 25e who,des*ite the riht s*irit!al mat!rity, thin#s that he is different from the 8ord willrea$h the same lower state as does a non+belie"er%2

I felt that 3haa"an was tellin me not to mo"e o!t of 1ala#ott!, not e"en to

"isit the 0shram% I ha"e ne"er left 1ala#ott! sin$e%

Shadow Bhagavan

On$e, there were films bein shown at the 0shram, in$l!din one on 3haa"an% Iwanted to see the film% When I arri"ed and *rostrated before 3haa"an, 5e saidin a stern "oi$e% 2So yo! ha"e $ome to see the shadow of 3haa"an% This means


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that yo! no loner ha"e the real 3haa"an in yo! and ha"e hen$e $ome to seethis shadow+3haa"an%2 This to!$hed me "ery dee*ly%

148175966 annamalai swami doc

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