balya

8/8/2019 balya

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IF u do not have time read last 3 lines:

Resume

Balakrishna Nandamuri Email: [email protected]

Phone: +910000000000

Career Object : To make the audience run away from theaters.

Preofessio'nil' Experience :y 3 0 years in Telugu Industry.

y J unior Artist - 1974 (with 1 hit, 9 flops)

y S ide role- 1979(14 flops)

y L ead role- 1986- till date( 4 hits, 44 flops)

Acting Skills: y S top Moving Trains, Killing People with Cocks(Palnati brahmanaidu),

y Climbing Mt. Everest with out any Help (Vijayendra varma),

y S hooting a bullet from mouth (Allari pidugu),

y Playing with current (Okka magadu), etc.

Expected CTC: Min. 5 crores for each film

Achievements: World Record, L imca Record and Pepsi Record in flops

Role Model: My S elf and Captain Vijayakanth,the Telugu Tiger of Tamil Nadu

Project Details :1. Bike riding on ground to running Train and go to Pakistan from India with Parachute only.2. Climbing any mountain with hands.3 . Pulling chair front and sending train back

Leadership Skills: y L ed 12564 hens and cocks to attack the enemies and won the battle.

Special Attraction: 1. S hoot People not only in movie, but outside also2. Having laser eyes. (Kanti Chuputho champaysatha)3 . S enseless talking in functions, interviews4. Hitting thigh (Thoda Kottadam)

Personal Details:

Name: BalKrish NAge : 3 0yrs in IndustryWeight: I Dont know Exactly(Mission Not Working...... S howing Display As "Weight L IMITOVER".)

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Hobbies: I am Not a Man to have Hobbies

Finally 2 Days Back, Sending This Resume to US Govt. with Ref. Barak Obamafor the post of Chief Investigation Officer, FBI.

Presently Thinking and Waiting for the Call.................!

Conclusion:

Balayya went to a library and asked for a book "Psycho The Rapist".The L ibrarian searched for hours and came back ...slapped Balayya and said,"Idiot, the book is called Psychotherapist ".

AFTER L ONG TIME S PECU L ATION S AND CHANGE S IN THE HERO CA S TING,

IT I S CONFIRMED THAT YUVARATNA NANDAMURI BA L AKRI S HNA I S GOING TOACT IN THE NEXT DHOOM S ERIE S MOVIE -

DHOOM-3S hooting has already been started .......

A Clip of the movie is given below ....

J ust go through the mail step by step...............................

....BA L AYYA Chasing Villains...

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....Petrol finished in his Bike......................................................Come on BA L AKRI S HNA ...............................................................................................................

8/8/2019 balya


Can't predict anything- He isthe "ONE & ONLY" !!

If you do not know who is Balakrishna... ....1. Balakrishna makes onions cry2. Balakrishna can delete the Recycle Bin.3. Ghosts are actually caused by Balakrishna killing people faster than Death can process them.4. Balakrishna can build a snowman..... out of rain.5. Balakrishna can strangle you with a cordless phone.6. Balakrishna can drown a fish.7. When Balakrishna enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on,.............. he turns the dark off.8. When Balakrishna looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enoughto get in between Balakrishna and Balakrishna.9. Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Balakrishna can throw Brett Favre even further.10. The last digit of pi is Balakrishna. He is the end of all things.11. Balakrishna does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.12. Bullets dodge Balakrishna.13. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actuallyin fact a warning, that the spotbelongs to Balakrishna and that you will be handicapped if you park there.14. Balakrishna' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Balakrishna.15. If you spell Balakrishna wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Balakrishna? " It simplyreplies, "Run while you still have the chance."16. Balakrishna can do a wheelie on a unicycle.17. Once a cobra bit Balakrishna' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.18. When Balakrishna gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.19. Balakrishna can kill two stones with one bird.20. Balakrishna was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel tostop.21. Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Balakrishna can kill 100percent of whatever he wants.

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22. There is no such thing as global warming. Balakrishna was cold, so he turned the sun up.23. Balakrishna can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.24. Balakrishna has a deep and abiding respect for human life? unless it gets in his way.25. Balakrishna once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"26. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Balakrishna could use to kill you, includingthe room itself.27. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Balakrishna.28. Balakrishna destroyed the periodic table, because Balakrishna only recognizes the element of surprise.29. Balakrishna got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.30. With the rising cost of gasoline, Balakrishna is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.31. The square root of Balakrishna is pain. Do not try to square Balakrishna, the result is death.32. When you say "no one's perfect", Balakrishna takes this as a personal insult.33. Outer space exists because itsw afraid to be on the same planet with Balakrishna34. Balakrishna has counted to infinity - twice35. When Balakrishna does a pushup, he isnt lifting himself up, he's pushing earth down36. Balakrishna is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.37. Balakrishna doesnt wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.38. Balakrishna gave MonaLisa that smile39. Balakrishna can slam a revolving door40. Balakrishna's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.41. Balakrishna grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.42. If you google search "Balakrishna getting kicked"your search will generate 0 results. It justdoesn't happen.43. It takes Balakrishna 20 mins to watch 60 minutes44. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Balakrishna kicked one of thecorners off.45. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Balakrishna lives in Hyderabad46. Balakrishna once ate an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink47. The only thing that runs faster and longer than Balakrishna are his films.48. Balakrishna every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of a morning

jog.49. Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Balakrishna there is no other way.

balya

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