Giving and Receiving of "Actions" in Japanese

～てあげる ～てもらう ～てくれる Part 1 -

Intermediate Lessons: 37

You have learned the three Japanese verbs for giving and receiving: あげる (ageru), もらう (morau) and

くれる (kureru) in basic lesson 20.

These three verbs can be used further to refer to the giving and receiving of "actions" (deeds). They indicate who is doing that act for whom, while also expressing a sense of goodwill or gratitude. In this

case, the act is expressed by the て-form.

Let's first recall the sentence patterns of あげる (ageru), もらう (morau) and くれる (kureru).

Giver は Receiver に Object を あげる

Receiver は Giver に Object を もらう

Giver は Receiver に Object を くれる

Note: Giver in もらう sentence cannot be the speaker (i.e. 私) himself/herself

As discussed in basic lesson 20, from a Japanese's point of view, he/she always shows the respect to other people (third person) first, followed by his/her own family members (even those who are younger than him/her) and lastly the speaker himself/herself. The picture below depicts this concept of respect given towards third person, one's family and oneself.

While もらう (morau) sentence focuses on the Receiver (being the subject of the sentence), the focus is

on the Giver (subject of the sentence) for both あげる (ageru) and くれる (kureru) sentences.

Also from basic lesson 20, the table below shows whether to use くれる (kureru) or あげる (ageru),

depending on whoever is the Giver or Receiver. When you have to show respect to ONLY the Giver,

use くれる (kureru). Otherwise you have to use あげる (ageru).

For example, you use くれる (kureru) when someone (third person) gives something to you or to your

family members, OR when your family members gives something to you. Giver Receiver Use

1. Third Person Third Person あげる

2. Third Person Me/Family Members くれる

3. I/Family Members Third Person あげる

4. Family Members Me くれる

5. I Family Members あげる

Giving and Receiving of "Actions" (Deeds)

Understanding the above basic concept of あげる (ageru), もらう (morau) and くれる (kureru), let's move

on to learn about the giving and receiving of "actions" (deeds). In this case, the Giver is doing something (action) for the Receiver instead of only giving something (object). Let's look at the following sentence:

私は家族に写真を見せました。

watashi wa kazoku ni shashin wo misemashita Meaning: I showed the photos to my family.

The above sentence is just a fact that you've shown the photos to your family. There's no personal feeling contained in the sentence. If you want to show that your family (Receiver) is grateful for your

action, change the sentence by using ～てあげる (~te ageru).

私は家族に写真を見せてあげました。

watashi wa kazoku ni shashin wo misete agemashita Meaning: I showed the photos to my family.

In the above example, the Giver (action taker) is the speaker (私). The receiver is the family (家族) and

the family feels grateful for what the speaker has done (showed the photos). The meaning of the sentence is exactly the same as the previous example except that in this example, the speaker thinks that his/her family will be grateful for his/her action.

Verb て-form あげる

Verb て-form あげる indicates that one does something (by way of doing a favor) for somebody with a

sense of goodwill. When the speaker is the action taker and the listener is the receiver of the act, this expression could give the impression that the speaker's act of doing a favor is forcing an unnecessary help upon the beneficiary.

You are, therefore, advised to avoid using this expression directly to someone whom you do not know very well or who is senior or superior to you. You may use it on someone with whom you have a very close, friendly relationship.

木村さんは田中さんに辞書を貸してあげました。

kimura san wa tanaka san ni jisho wo kashite agemashita Meaning: Mr Kimura lent Mr Tanaka an dictionary.

The subject of the above example is Mr Kimura, which is also the Giver of the act.

Verb て-form もらう

Verb て-form もらう indicates that "Somebody kindly does something for me" or "I have somebody

doing something for me". This expression conveys a sense of gratitude on the part of those who receive a favor.

私は山野さんに日本語を教えてもらいました。

watashi wa yamano san ni nihongo wo oshiete moraimashita Meaning: Ms Yamano taught me Japanese (and I feel grateful).

The subject of the above example is the speaker (私), which is also the Receiver of the act.

Verb て-form くれる

Verb て-form くれる indicates that somebody does a favor for me. This expression also conveys a sense

of gratitude on the part of those who receive a favor.

The difference is that Verb て-form もらう has the Receiver of the act as the subject of the sentence,

while Verb て-form くれる has the Giver as the subject of the sentence, implying the giver (the subject)

voluntarily takes the action. The receiver of the act in the latter case is often the speaker and "私 (the

receiver) に" is often omitted.

山野さんは[私に]日本語を教えてくれました。

yamano san wa [watashi ni] nihongo wo oshiete kuremashita Meaning: Ms Yamano taught me Japanese (and I feel grateful).

The subject of the above example is Ms Yamano, which is also the Giver of the act. The "私に" in the

bracket [] is often omitted.

In the next lesson (part 2 of giving and receiving of "actions"), I will demonstrate how to use ～てあげ

る, ～てもらう and ～てくれる with many different examples. You will also learn what are the particles

used depending on the verbs in the examples.

Giving and Receiving of Actions in Japanese

～てあげる ～てもらう ～てくれる Part 2 -

Intermediate Lessons: 38

This lesson is part 2 of the previous lesson. I will show you many different examples on how to use ～て

あげる, ～てもらう and ～てくれる for giving and receiving of "actions" (deeds).

Depending on the verbs used for the actions, you will also learn what are the specific particles used in these examples.

Let's check out the sentence patterns for ～てあげる, ～てもらう and ～てくれる

Sentence Pattern of ～てあげる

The person who gives assistance

は The person who receives assistance

を/

に Noun を/

の Noun を

て-form あげます

Note: Used when a person does something beneficial to another person. When "私" is the subject of the

sentence, it may give the impression that the favor is being forcefully imposed. So be careful when using it.

Sentence Pattern of ～てくれる

The person who gives assistance

は The person who receives assistance

を/

に Noun を/

の Noun を

て-form くれます

Third Person → Me/My Family

My Family → Me

Note: Used when a person feels grateful towards a person who has helped him/her.

Sentence Pattern of ～てもらう

The person who receives assistance

は/が The person who gives assistance

に て-form もらいます

X Me

X Third Person → My Family

Note: Used when a person who has asked for help feels grateful towards the person who helped him/her.

You will see that for ～てあげる and ～てくれる sentences, the person who receives the assistance can be

marked by particle に, の or を, all depending on the verbs used. This is the most difficult part when using

these sentence patterns as many of you always get confused about which particle to use. To determine which particle to use, you have got to understand the verb involved in the sentence. Most verbs are tied to specific particle. To help you on this, I will show you about 20 verbs together with some examples. Memorize the formats of all of them if you need to. This will help you determine the correct particle once you see similar verbs.

On the other hand in ～てもらう sentence, the action taker is always marked by the particle に. Therefore

you will see only the following pattern for ～てもらう sentence...

Action Receiver は Action Taker に て-form もらいます

Note: Action taker cannot be 私, nor My Family if the action receiver is Third Person

10 Verbs with Example Sentences

1. Person に Noun を 見せる

見せる (miseru) means to show. When using this verb, the format is always

"Person に Noun を 見せる". For example,

私は友達に写真を見せます。

watashi wa tomodachi ni shashin wo misemasu Meaning: I show the photos to my friend.

Using the above sentence pattern, you just need to change the verb 見せる (miseru) to て-form and add

in あげます. It becomes...

私は友達に写真を見せてあげます。

watashi wa tomodachi ni shashin wo misete agemasu Meaning: I show the photos to my friend.

In the above example, the Giver is 私 (the speaker), the Receiver is 友達. Since the Giver is 私, you

cannot use the ～てもらう sentence. Therefore the following example is not accepted, although

grammatically there's no mistake.

友達は私に写真を見せてもらいます。 X

tomodachi wa watashi ni shashin wo misete moraimasu X

2. Person に Noun を 教える

教える (oshieru) means to teach, to inform, to tell. Similar to the previous example the format is

"Person に Noun を 教える".

With the above sentence patterns, you will see the following examples...

Giver is 先生. Receiver is 私達.

先生は私達に日本語を教えてくれました。

sensei wa watashitachi ni nihongo wo oshiete kuremashita Meaning: Teacher taught us Japanese.

私達は先生に日本語を教えてもらいました。

watashitachi wa sensei ni nihongo wo oshiete moraimashita Meaning: Teacher taught us Japanese.

3. Person に Noun を 貸す

貸す (kasu) means to lend.

Format is "Person に Noun を 貸す".

Giver is 兄. Receiver is 弟.

兄は弟にお金を貸してあげました。

ani wa otouto ni okane wo kashite agemashita Meaning: My elder brother lent money to my younger brother.

弟は兄にお金を貸してもらいました。

otouto wa ani ni okane wo kashite moraimashita Meaning: My elder brother lent money to my younger brother.

4. Person に 席 を 譲る

譲る (yuzuru) means to hand over, to transfer, to

relinquish, to give up.

Format is "Person に Noun を 譲る".

Giver is 田中さん. Receiver is お婆さん.

田中さんはお婆さんに席を譲ってあげました。

tanaka san wa obaasan ni seki wo yuzutte agemashita Meaning: Mr Tanaka gave up his seat to the old lady.

お婆さんは田中さんに席を譲ってもらいました。

obaasan wa tanaka san ni seki wo yuzutte moraimashita Meaning: Mr Tanaka gave up his seat to the old lady.

5. Person に Noun を 作る

作る tsukuru) means to make, to create.

Format is "Person に Noun を 作る".

Giver is 母. Receiver is 私.

母は私にご飯を作ってくれました。

haha wa watashi ni gohan wo tsukutte kuremashita Meaning: My mother made a meal for me.

私は母にご飯を作ってもらいました。

watashi wa haha ni gohan wo tsukutte moraimashita Meaning: My mother made a meal for me.

6. Person に Noun を 買う

買う (kau) means to buy.

Format is "Person に Noun を 買う".

Giver is 父. Receiver is 妹.

父は妹にアイスクリームを買ってあげました。

chichi wa imouto ni aisukuri-mu wo katte agemashita Meaning: My father bought ice-cream for my younger sister.

妹は父にアイスクリームを買ってもらいました。

imouto wa chichi ni aisukuri-mu wo katte moraimashita Meaning: My father bought ice-cream for my younger sister.

7. Person を 送る

送る (okuru) means to send (a thing), to take (a person somewhere), to see off (a person).

Format is "Person を 送る".

Giver is 兄. Receiver is 私.

兄は私を駅まで送ってくれました。

ani wa watashi wo eki made okutte kuremashita Meaning: My elder brother took me to the train station.

私は兄に駅まで送ってもらいました。

watashi wa ani ni eki made okutte moraimashita Meaning: My elder brother took me to the train station.

9. Person を 待つ

待つ (matsu) means to wait.

Format is "Person を 待つ".

Giver is 水野さん. Receiver is 田中さん.

水野さんは田中さんを待ってあげました。

mizuno san wa tanaka san wo matte agemashita Meaning: Mr Mizuno waited for Mr Tanaka.

田中さんは水野さんに待ってもらいました。

tanaka san wa mizuno san ni matte moraimashita Meaning: Mr Mizuno waited for Mr Tanaka.

10. Person を Place へ 連れて行く

連れて行く (tsurete iku) means to take someone (of lower status) along.

Format is "Person を Noun へ 連れて行く".

Giver is 父. Receiver is 妹.

父は妹をデパートへ連れて行ってあげました。

chichi wa imouto wo depa-to e tsureteitte agemashita Meaning: My father took my younger sister to the department store.

妹は父にデパートへ連れて行ってもらいました。

imouto wa chichi ni depa-to e tsureteitte moraimashita Meaning: My father took my younger sister to the department store.