3100words manuscriptdisposable

HowtoStartaZombieApocalypse:Chapter1Draft2

Atfirst,itseemedlikedyingastheresultoftakingabulletthroughhisbrainwasthebest

thingthathadeverhappenedtoBlaze.

Success.Whenhewasalive,Blazehadneverbeengoodatpsychologycomparedto

otherCMUstudents.Now,thankstotheOvercompensationEffect,Blazewasgettingstraight

Asinallofhisclassesandworkingoncuttingedgebrainresearch.ANeuroscienceProdigy?

HowoneundergraduatestudentmighthavejustdiscoveredasurgicalwaytocureBrain

DiminutiveDisease,readthecoveroftheJanuary2022issueofPsychologyToday.

Love.Hissuccessspilledintootherthings.WhenMelissarecognizedthepersononthe

frontcoverofherfavoritemagazine,shewasinterestedinlearningmoreabouthim.Maybeit

washisnewfoundsuccess,ormaybeitwasjusttheconfidencehegainedfromit,butshe

becamemoreandmoreinterestedinBlaze.Shefoundhisshort,brownhair,greyeyes,and

muscularphysiqueattractive.Blazeoftenwonderedwhatshewouldthinkofhimifsheknewhe

wasazombie.Still,theybecamemorethanfriends.

Friends.Forthefirsttime,Blazefinallyfeltlikehehadsomewherehebelonged.Among

peoplewhodieatayoungenoughage,thereareonlysomanywhodiewiththeirbodyintact

enoughtobecomezombies.Andamongthese,thereareonlysomanywithafriendorfamily

memberwhoisableandwillingtoillegallyobtainasampleofthepozaroviruswithin24hoursof

theirdeath.Andamongthese,thereareonlysomanywhosedeathneverbecamepublicly

knownandarenttoodeformedbythepozarovirussOvercompensationEffecttobe

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inconspicuouszombies--abletopassthemselvesoffashumans.SowhenBlaze,John,and

Samanthafoundoutthattheywereallzombies,theyinstantlybecamefriends.

Theysoondecidedtostophangingoutinpublic.

Tobehonest,Johnbroughtuponeday,Ithinkweshouldunfriendeachotheron

Facebook.Ifoneofusisdiscovered,peoplemightbegintosuspectthatourconnectionsare

alsozombies.

Dude,yourebeingparanoidagain.saidSamantha.

Actually,tobehonest,Johnsaid.Anditreallypainsmetosaythis,but,Imbeginning

tothinkweshouldalsostophangingoutalltogether.

Youcantbeserious.saidSamantha.

Tobehonest,youguysarethebestfriendsIveeverhad.Thingshavebeenreally

terribleeversince...Johnpausedtolookaround....eversincebecomingazombie,andyou

guysaretheonlypeopleIcantalktoaboutit.Buttobehonest,itsjusttooriskyforustokeep

hangingoutintheopenlikethis.Idontwanttobequarantined.MichaelJoneshadthisarticle

yesterdayaboutwhatgoesoninthequarantines,and...

DUDE,Samanthabegan.Pleasedontbringupthatstupidconspiracywebsiteagain.

Andalso,stoptalkingaboutthegovernmentasifitsthisonesingularthing.

Blazeexaminedhisfriends.HeknewJohnslegswereabitoff,butasalways,hewas

wearingpants,soitwasntpossibletotell.Otherthanthat,hewasjustatypicalskinny,

brown-haired,brown-eyed,glasses-wearing,nerdy-looking,polo-shirt-wearingrecentcollege

grad.Andwithherusualill-form-fittingbaggyt-shirtandpajamapants,tall,slender,andpalewith

blondhair,blueeyes,andanearperfectcomplexion--therewasnothingout-of-the-ordinaryor

evenremotelywrongwrongwithSamanthasappearance.Blazeknewthathisheadwasabit

tallerthannormal,butwithhishairgrownout,noonecouldtell.Thelastthinganyonecould

accusethemofbeingisconspicuous--theyweretextbookinconspicuouszombies.

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Still,bettersafethansorry.Atleast,Blazeweighedinonthedisagreement,Actually,I

somewhatagreewithJohn.Weshouldbeabitmorediscreetwhenwehehangout.

Weshouldnthavetodothingsdifferentlybecauseofthefuckedupviewspeoplehaveof

us,Samanthasaid.

Weshouldnthaveto,Blazesaid,Butunfortunately,thatsthewaythingsare.

Samanthasighed.Shehadlearnedthat,wheneverJohnandBlazecametothesame

conclusion,itwasbetterifshejustgavein.Thissucks,butokay.Iactuallyknowofagood

place.

Andthatshowtheystartedhangingoutatthedesertedwarehouse.Itneverceasedto

amazeBlazethatheknewasingleotherinconspicuouszombie,letaloneasmanyashe

eventuallydid.JohnmetSerenity,andthenSamanthabroughtJimalongoneday.Finally,there

werefiveofthemmeetinginthedesertedwarehouseeachweek.MorefriendsthanBlazehad

hadoverthecourseofhislife.

Thingswerefinallylookingup.Then,therewasanoutbreakof

Brain-Diminutive-Disease-contaminatedmeat.

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BrainDiminutiveDiseaseusuallymeanscertaindeath.Acoupleweeksaftereating

taintedmeat,youbegintoaskyourselfquestions.

IsschoolgettingharderoramIjustnotgettingasmuchsleepasIshould?

HowcouldIforgettobringmyphonewithmetwiceinthesameweek?

Woh,howdidtimeslipbysoquickly?

Then,oneday,yourealizethatyoucantrememberyourownname.Inapanic,youhead

directlytothenearestUrgentCarecenter.Thedoctortakesabloodsample,makesyousit

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anxiouslyinthewaitingroomforanhour,tellsyouthesadnewswhentheresultsfinallycome

back,givesyousomethingtodelayyoureventualfateforayearortwo,andthenyoudie.

Still,despitethefactthatBlazesresearchoncuringBrainDiminutiveDiseasehadyetto

evenreachthestageofanimaltesting,Blazewasnoteventheslightestbitconcernedwhenhe

gotMelissastext:

Notifiedthismorningthatsomeofthecontaminatedmeatwasinoneofmy

mealslastweek.Testedthisafternoon,camebackpositiveforBDD:(

Thereasonforthatkindoftestinginmedicine,hesaidtoMelissa,Isthatpeopledont

reallyfullyunderstandhowthehumanbrainandbodywork,sotheyjustdotrialanderror.They

guessatsolutions,andthentestwhethertheyseemtodomoregoodthanharm.Butwhenyou

havethekindofunderstandingIhave,youdontneedtoguessatwhatmightwork--youjust

know.

Atfirst,thismadeMelissafeelbetter.Howeveraftertalkingtoherparents,Melissasent

Blazemultipletextsinarowexplainingherdecisiontoundergotheusual,doctor-recommended

treatmentinstead:

Youviewyourselfasbeingsorational,butyourejustreallygoodatcomingup

withandsellingrationalizationsforyouremotions.Yourejustindenial.

Sorry,didntmeantocomeacrosssoharshinthelasttext.Itsjustthatwere

only20,andtherearepeoplewhovebeendoingthisfordecades.

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Plusingeneralyouresortofcrazy.Evenyouhavetoadmitthat.Likeyoure

reallysmart,butyoudontalwaysthinkstraight.Yourenotalwaysright.

Afterthat,MelissaavoidedBlazeforaboutaweekanddidntrespondtoanyofthetexts

hesenthertryingtoconvincehertochangehermind.Thenoutoftheblue,Blazefinallygota

textfromher:

Ichangedmymind.Iwantmorethanayearleftoflife.Letsgothroughwithit.

SoheretheywereinCMUsCognitiveNeuroscienceLabat4:45AMinthemorning,

waitingforthesedativesBlazehadjustgivenMelissatokickin.Melissalayfaceuponametal

rollingtable,wearingabluemedicalgown.Blaze,wearingalabcoatoverhisusualcasualjeans

andt-shirt,stood,leaningagainstthewall.AcouchandTVwereplacedinfrontofthelockedlab

door--justincase.

Melissabrokethesilence.YouwoulddothisifyouhadBrainDiminutiveDisease,

right?

Blazewassurprisedbyherquestion.Well,Icantperformtheprocedureonmyself,and

Imnotsurewhoelsewoulddoit.ButifIwereyou,yeah.Ofcourse,hesaid.

Andforthereasonofsavingyourlife,notjustforthesakeofresearch?shesaid.

Blazewastakenabackbythisquestion.Yeah,tosavemylife.Blazesaid.Melissa

seemedsomewhatsatisfiedBlazesresponses,andrelaxedalittle.

Youknow,atleastIdonthavepozarovirus,Melissajoked.

YoureallythinkbeingazombieisworsethanhavingBrainDiminutiveDisease?Blaze

said.

Well,atleastwithBDD,Idonthavetoworryaboutharmingthepeoplearoundme,she

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said.

Neitherdopeoplewithpozarovirus!Blazesnapped.Melissawastakenabackbythe

sharpnessinhisvoice.Therehasneverbeenazombie-to-humantransmissionofpozarovirus,

andtheideathatzombiescantstopthemselvesfromeatingbrainsisntbasedonanyreliable

dataeither.

Sorry,werebothreallystressed,Melissasaid.

Imnotstressed,Blazesnappedagain.

Yesyouare.Iwishyouwouldputsomeofyourintellectualenergytowardfiguringout

emotions--andpeopleingeneralforthatmatter,Melissasaidinafrustratedtone.Then,seeing

thingswereabouttodevolveintoanargument,sheregainedhercomposure,Eitherway,Im

stressed,soletsnotgetintopoliticsrightnow.Andyoureprobablyrightyouknowalotmore

aboutdiseasesthanIdo.Plus,Imstartingtofeelthesedatives.

Acoupleminuteslater,Melissahadcompletelypassedout.Blazeturnedonthedrill,and

preparedtomaketheinitialincision.

Blazewasabitnervous,butnotabouthisresearch.Still,heshouldntbe,hetoldhimself.

WhathehadsaidtoMelissawastrue,andtherewasnothingtoworryabout.

Tobehonest,sayingthatzombiescanthelpbuteatbrainsislikesayingthatmencant

helpbutrapewomen,Johnwouldsay.

Blazemadetheinitialincision.

BlazewasntquitesurewhetherornothelovedMelissa.Wheneverhewasaround

Melissa,hewouldfeelwarmontheinside.Andwhenevertheydecidedtohangout,regardlessof

howbadhisdayhadbeen,justseeingherfacewouldmakehisbreakoutinabeamingsmile.

HoweverdespiterecognizingthatmostpeoplefoundMelissaslong,redhair,hazel-colored

eyes,andslimphysiqueattractive,Blazeneverreallyfeltmuchsexualdesiretowardher.Or

anyone,recently,forthatmatter.

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Untilnow.

StaringatMelissasexposedbrain,allofthesurgicalstepsthatBlazehadmentallygone

throughoverandoveragainthroughoutthelastcoupledayscompletelylefthishead.Allhe

couldthinkaboutishowturnedonhewasbythepink,juicy,lusciousbrainrightinfrontofhim.

Everythingelse--thedrynessofthesurroundingair,theslowdrummingofthelaboratoryA/C,the

nauseatingsmelloforange-scentedfloorcleaner--dissolvedoutoffocus.

Itwasatthatmomentthatherealizedtherewouldbenosurgeryoccurringthatnight.

BlazemovedhismouthtowardMelissasbr