9 habits forgiveness resource ks3&4 assembly ... · the following track ‘one day’ by...

Forgiveness KS3&4 Assembly

Choosing to forgive: how we say sorry

© Copyright 2018 Oasis UK© Copyright 2018 Oasis UK

Oasis 9 HabitsKS3&4 Assembly ForgivenessChoosing to forgive: how we say sorryThis assembly has been written for KS3&4 to help students think about how we say sorry as part of the development of the habit of forgiveness.

Length:

15 – 30 minutes

Aims

• To understand more fully what forgiveness means

• To discover how we can show forgiveness and to recognise the impact being forgiving has on others

• To think about how to apologise when we make a mistake or say or do something wrong

• To consider the link between being forgiven and forgiving others

• To have opportunity to consider how faith and belief in God impacts people’s sense of forgiveness

Resources

‘How good are we at saying sorry?’ TrueTube video www.truetube.co.uk/fi lm/im-sorry

Desmond Tutu speaking about forgiveness https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=raG6eIL-LM0#t=168.363840641

‘Choosing to forgive’ Awe & Wonder Resource‘One Day’ by Matisyahu available to download from iTunes

Appendix One – Story of Mr. Van Der Broek

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Content

1. Hard to say I’m sorry…

Today we are going to talk about a subject that can be diffi cult for both children and adults – and the subject is forgiveness. Sometimes saying sorry is a really hard thing to do.

Invite the students to identify, through a show of hands, where they would place themselves on a sliding scale of 1 (low) – 10 (high) with regard to how good they are at saying sorry?

Now show either a PowerPoint Slide of the ‘How sorry are you?’ scenarios or invite three volunteers to come and open the envelopes and read out the ‘How sorry are you?’ scenarios.

Explain

Explain

‘How sorry are you really?’ Scenarios in envelopes or on PowerPoint containing the following:

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Scenario One‘My kid sister upset me because she was in my room going through my things - so I pulled her hair and she ran to Mum screaming. Mum made me say sorry. I did, but only because Mum made me. But if my kid sister goes anywhere near my things again, I’ll do exactly the same thing.’

Scenario Two‘I got sent to the Head of Department for answering back and being rude to my teacher. I was only trying to be funny and then I felt bad, because the teacher has always been alright. So as well as doing my detention, I also apologised and told him I will stay in tomorrow lunchtime to catch up on the work I missed.

Scenario Three‘I borrowed my friend’s FIFA game and now I can’t fi nd it and they want it back. I’ve said sorry so I really don’t know why they are still upset. It was a birthday present, so it’s not like it cost them any money or anything!’

Talk through the scenarios together;• How many of these scenarios sound like that the person is sorry?

• Are there any that don’t sound like the person is sorry?

• Which one do you think sounds like they want to apologise?

• Which one do you think sounds like they want to forgive?

• Now ask for a show of hands for what they think is the best apology.

As we can see, some apologies seem more genuine than others.

2. How good are we at sorry? Watch the following video clip which discuss the importance or not of saying sorry and for forgiveness;

www.truetube.co.uk/fi lm/im-sorry

3. What is forgiveness? Talk through the following;Saying sorry seems to be a key part of forgiveness. But what is forgiveness?

One defi nition is Stop feeling angry or resentful towards (someone) for an offence, fl aw, or mistake. (Oxford Living Dictionaries)

Another is ‘To pardon a debt or an offence, to overlook.” (Chambers Dictionary)Nelson Mandela stated the ‘When a deep injury is done to us, we never heal until we forgive.”

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3. The South Africa journeyWe know that forgiveness is something that is often diffi cult for people. One person who has written a lot about forgiveness is Desmond Tutu who was the black Archbishop of Cape Town during Apartheid in South Africa. He chaired the Truth and Reconciliation Committee in South Africa following the end of Apartheid.

Watch the following video in which Desmond Tutu talks about the importance of forgiving others and how it actually makes you feel better too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=raG6eIL-LM0#t=168.363840641

4. Challenge and Refl ectionRead the story of Mr. Van der Broek from the South African Truth & Reconciliation Committee to the students. This is available in Appendix One. It is a very challenging story and you will need to be familiar with it yourself before reading.

Refl ection Questions• What have you learnt today that will help you be more forgiving?• What has struck you from the story of Mr. Van der Broek?• Can you think of a time during the next few days when you will try and

practice some of the things that you have learnt?• If you have a belief in God, what could you ask God to help you with regarding

how you can grow to be more forgiving?

Awe & WonderShow the ‘Choosing to forgive’ Awe & Wonder Resource. You will need to embed the following track ‘One Day’ by Matisyahu onto the Awe & Wonder Resource.

ConclusionMost of us would we like to be forgiven when we are sorry for something, or have made a mistake, said or done something that we know that we should not have done. But how quick are we to say sorry for those things? Let’s challenge ourselves to be better at making an apology

PrayerGodHelp us to recognise when we have hurt other people and help us to apologise for our actions.Help us to treat people in a way that we would like to be treated and love others as we would like to be loved.Amen.

Appendix OneSouth African Truth & Reconciliation Committee and the story of Mr. Van der Broek

Imagine this scene from a recent courtroom trial in South Africa: A frail black woman stands slowly to her feet. She is about 70 years of age. Facing her from across the room are several white police offi cers, one of whom, Mr. van der Broek, has just been tried and found implicated in the murders of both the woman’s son and her husband some years before.

It was indeed Mr. Van der Broek, it has now been established, who had come to the woman’s home a number of years back, taken her son, shot him at point-blank range and then burned the young man’s body on a fi re while he and his offi cers partied nearby.

Several years later, Van der Broek and his security police colleagues had returned to take away her husband as well. For many months she heard nothing of his whereabouts. Then, almost two years after her husband’s disappearance, Van der Broek came back to fetch the woman herself. How vividly she remembers that evening, going to a place beside a river where she was shown her husband, bound and beaten, but still strong in spirit, lying on a pile of wood. The last words she heard from his lips as the offi cers poured gasoline over his body and set him afl ame were, “Father, forgive them.”

And now the woman stands in the courtroom and listens to the confessions offered by Mr. Van der Broek. A member of South Africa’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission turns to her and asks, “So, what do you want? How should justice be done to this man who has so brutally destroyed your family?”

“I want three things,” begins the old woman, calmly but confi dently. “I want fi rst to be taken to the place where my husband’s body was burned so that I can gather up the dust and give his remains a decent burial.”

She pauses, then continues. “My husband and son were my only family. I want, secondly, therefore, for Mr. Van der Broek to become my son. I would like for him to come twice a month to the ghetto and spend a day with me so that I can pour out on him whatever love I still have remaining within me.”

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“And, fi nally,” she says, “I want a third thing. I would like Mr. Van der Broek to know that I offer him my forgiveness because Jesus Christ died to forgive. This was also the wish of my husband. And so, I would kindly ask someone to come to my side and lead me across the courtroom so that I can take Mr. van der Broek in my arms, embrace him and let him know that he is truly forgiven.”

As the court assistants come to lead the elderly woman across the room, Mr. van der Broek, overwhelmed by what he has just heard, faints. And as he does, those in the courtroom, friends, family, neighbours — all victims of decades of oppression and injustice — begin to sing, softly, but assuredly, “Amazing grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me.”

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