הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ shabbat sheminijune 16 - suedah shlishit sponsored by the...

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התפילה בשעת לדבר לא נאPLEASE NO CONVERSATION DURING SERVICES Rabbi Ely Shestack President Aryeh Brenenson ד בס1 WEEKDAY DAVENING INFORMATION Sunday (4/15) Monday (4/16) Tuesday (4/17) Wednesday (4/18) Thursday (4/19) Friday (4/20) Earliest Talit 5:19 AM 5:17 AM 5:15 AM 5:13 AM 5:12 AM 5:10 AM Shacharit 8:00 AM 6:00 AM 6:25 AM 6:25 AM 6:15 AM 6:25 AM Gedolah 1:30 PM 1:30 PM 1:30 PM 1:30 PM 1:30 PM 1:29 PM Mincha - Maariv 7:20 PM 7:20 PM 7:20 PM 7:20 PM 7:20 PM 7:00 PM Shkia 7:36 PM 7:37 PM 7:38 PM 7:39 PM 7:40 PM Tzait 8:21 PM 8:22 PM 8:23 PM 8:24 PM 8:25 PM CONGREGATION AHAVAT ACHIM and RELIGIOUS ZIONISTS OF AMERICA are proud to announce a Scholar - in -Residence S habbaton celebrating 70 years of the State of Israel SHABBAT PARASHAT SHEMINI APRIL 13-14, 2018 For more details about the program and sponsorship opportunities, please visit www.ahavatachim.org or call 201-797-0502 www.mizrachi.org/70for70 Rabbi David Brofsky Rabbi David Brofsky is an author and educator. He has taught Talmud and halacha in yeshivas and seminaries in Israel, including Yeshivat Har Etzion and Michlelet Mevaseret Yerushalyim. He is currently a senior faculty member at Midreshet Lindenbaum, teaches in Midreshet Torah V’Avodah, and writes a halacha shiur for the Virtual Beit Midrash (VBM). Rabbi Brofsky is the author of Hilchot Tella: A Comprehensive Guide to the Laws of Daily Prayer, Hilchot Moadim: Understanding the Laws of the Festivals, and an upcoming book on the laws of mourning. He studied at Yeshiva University and Yeshivat Har Etzion. He lives in Alon Shevut, Gush Etzion with his wife, Mali, and their four children. Mazal Tov to Randi & Arnie Spier who are this year's Ahavat Achim Journal Dinner Honorees to take place on Sunday, April 29. Get your ads in now. Dinner is approaching fast! שמיני פרשת שבתSHABBAT SHEMINI 29 NISAN - APRIL 14 Haftorah is from חדשמחר, the Haftorah for Shabbat Erev Rosh Chodesh (Samuel I 20:18- 42). We bless the month of Iyar. We don’t say מלאל אor צדקצדקתך. We say הרחמיםאב. Pirkei Avot Chapter 1. FRIDAY NIGHT MINCHA - 7:00 PM CANDLE LIGHTING - 7:16 PM TZAIT - 8:19 PM SATURDAY SHACHARIT YOUTH - 8:20 AM SHACHARIT MAIN - 9:00 AM LAST KRIAT SHEMA - 9:38 AM GEMARA SHIUR - 5:50 PM MINCHA - 6:50 PM SHKIA - 7:35 PM MAARIV/HAVDALAH - 8:20 PM ————— CONGREGATION AHAVAT ACHIM 18-25 SADDLE RIVER ROAD FAIR LAWN, NJ 07410-5909 201-797-0502 WWW.AHAVATACHIM.ORG BULLETIN INFORMATION TO REQUEST A BULLETIN ANNOUNCEMENT (BY 7:00 PM WEDNESDAY) OR DEDICATE A BULLETIN FOR $36 ($54 W/PHOTO), EMAIL [email protected] ————— Molad for Iyar is Sunday, April 15, 4:37 PM & 5 Chalokim. עלינו הבא ראשון יום יהיה אייר חדש ראש לטובה ישראל כל ועלSIR Speaking Schedule Shabbat Morning Drasha - "Israel @ 70: Why it Matters More Than Ever” Fundamentals of Jewish Thought-”How Fundamental is Israel in Jewish Thought and Law” Pre-mincha Shiur - "The Role of Minhagim in an Age of the In-gathering of the Diasporas” Teen Seudah Shlishit @ the Rabbi's home w/ R' Brofsky - "As if you were in Israel": A unique opportunity for teens and college students to get a taste of the Torah of Eretz Yisrael from a top notch Yeshiva & Seminary teacher. (for teens & college students only, hosted by the Shestacks)

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Page 1: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

נא לא לדבר בשעת התפילהPLEASE NO CONVERSATION DURING SERVICES

Rabbi Ely Shestack President Aryeh Brenenson

בס”ד

"1

WEEKDAY DAVENING INFORMATIONSunday (4/15)

Monday (4/16)

Tuesday (4/17)

Wednesday (4/18)

Thursday (4/19)

Friday (4/20)

Earliest Talit 5:19 AM 5:17 AM 5:15 AM 5:13 AM 5:12 AM 5:10 AM

Shacharit 8:00 AM 6:00 AM 6:25 AM 6:25 AM 6:15 AM 6:25 AM

Gedolah 1:30 PM 1:30 PM 1:30 PM 1:30 PM 1:30 PM 1:29 PM

Mincha - Maariv 7:20 PM 7:20 PM 7:20 PM 7:20 PM 7:20 PM 7:00 PM

Shkia 7:36 PM 7:37 PM 7:38 PM 7:39 PM 7:40 PM

Tzait 8:21 PM 8:22 PM 8:23 PM 8:24 PM 8:25 PM

CONGREGATION AHAVAT ACHIMand RELIGIOUS ZIONISTS OF AMERICA

are proud to announce aScholar-in-Residence Shabbaton

celebrating 70 years of the State of Israel

SHABBAT PARASHAT SHEMINIAPRIL 13-14, 2018

For more details about the program and sponsorship opportunities,please visit www.ahavatachim.org or call 201-797-0502

www.mizrachi.org/70for70

Rabbi David BrofskyRabbi David Brofsky is an author and educator. He has taught Talmud and

halacha in yeshivas and seminaries in Israel, including Yeshivat Har Etzion and Michlelet Mevaseret Yerushalyim. He is currently a senior faculty member at Midreshet Lindenbaum, teaches in Midreshet Torah V’Avodah, and writes a

halacha shiur for the Virtual Beit Midrash (VBM). Rabbi Brofsky is the author of Hilchot Tefilla: A Comprehensive Guide to the Laws of Daily Prayer, Hilchot

Moadim: Understanding the Laws of the Festivals, and an upcoming book on the laws of mourning. He studied at Yeshiva University and Yeshivat Har Etzion. He

lives in Alon Shevut, Gush Etzion with his wife, Mali, and their four children.

Mazal Tov to Randi & Arnie Spier who are this year's Ahavat Achim Journal Dinner Honorees to take place on Sunday, April 29. Get your ads in now. Dinner is approaching fast!

שבת פרשת שמיניSHABBAT SHEMINI29 NISAN - APRIL 14

Haftorah is from חדש ,מחר the Haftorah for Shabbat Erev Rosh Chodesh (Samuel I 20:18-42). We bless the month of Iyar. We don’t say .אב הרחמים We say .צדקתך צדק or א≠ל מלאPirkei Avot Chapter 1.

FRIDAY NIGHTMINCHA - 7:00 PMCANDLE LIGHTING - 7:16 PMTZAIT - 8:19 PM

SATURDAYSHACHARIT YOUTH - 8:20 AM SHACHARIT MAIN - 9:00 AM LAST KRIAT SHEMA - 9:38 AMGEMARA SHIUR - 5:50 PMMINCHA - 6:50 PMSHKIA - 7:35 PMMAARIV/HAVDALAH - 8:20 PM

—————

CONGREGATION AHAVAT ACHIM18-25 SADDLE RIVER ROADFAIR LAWN, NJ 07410-5909201-797-0502WWW.AHAVATACHIM.ORG

BULLETIN INFORMATIONTO REQUEST A BULLETIN ANNOUNCEMENT (BY 7:00 PM WEDNESDAY) OR DEDICATE A BULLETIN FOR $36 ($54 W/PHOTO), EMAIL [email protected]

—————

Molad for Iyar is Sunday, April 15, 4:37 PM & 5 Chalokim. ראש חדש אייר יהיה יום ראשון הבא עלינו

ועל כל ישראל לטובה

SIR Speaking Schedule Shabbat Morning Drasha -

"Israel @ 70: Why it Matters More Than Ever”

Fundamentals of Jewish Thought-”How Fundamental is Israel in Jewish Thought and Law”

Pre-mincha Shiur - "The Role of Minhagim in an Age of the In-gathering of the Diasporas”

Teen Seudah Shlishit @ the Rabbi's home w/ R' Brofsky - "As if you were in Israel": A unique opportunity for teens and college students to get a taste of the Torah of Eretz Yisrael from a top notch Yeshiva & Seminary teacher. (for teens & college students only, hosted by the Shestacks)

Page 2: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

Shirley Vann has dedicated this week’s Covenant & Conversation (used with permission of the Office of Rabbi Sacks) in memory of her beloved mother Necha bat Yitzchokע”ה.

"2

Kiddush InformationIf you are around when the Rabbi

says “על המחיה”, your assistance in clean up would be appreciated. Kiddush setup for this Shabbat:

Bernstein, Goldstein, Infield Kiddush setup for next Shabbat:

Baron, Zarabi, Safier To sponsor a Kiddush

($1000/$613/$318 plus scotch) send an email to [email protected].

Adult Education

CHUMASH CLASS - Shabbat morning before Shacharit. GEMARA SHIUR - One hour

before Mincha, through the first Shabbat in November. DAYTIME TORAH VOYAGES -

Thursdays at 2:00 PM. FUNDAMENTALS OF JEWISH

THOUGHT - After Kiddush. PEREK ON THE LAWN, Pirkei

Avot Periodic Shiur.

Gita Cooperwasserע”ה

Youth ProgramPlease contact

Melanie at [email protected] and volunteer to host Chad (our Youth Director) for shabbat and/or meals. Youth groups at 10:00 AM. Tot

Shabbat in the playroom.

Pack 613 Meeting DatesApr. 22: 3 PM - 6 PM; May 6: 4:30 -

5:30 PM and June 17: 4:30- 6 PM

Community EventsApr. 15 - Areyvut Chesed Fair,

creating Chesed Projects for those in need.  All ages welcome. First 100 attendees receive a National Mitzvah Day shirt.  For more info: 201-244-6702 or [email protected]

Apr. 17 – Yizkereim, a Yom HaZikaron event to remember 23,632 soldiers/security forces who sacrificed their lives defending Israel. SHOMREI TORAH, after Mincha at 6:45 PM. Apr. 22 – Paint Night with PAINT

WITH ME!. All will go home with a painting to be proud of. Refreshments served. DARCHEI NOAM, Sun. night, 7:45 – 10:00 PM. $45 per person ($36 if RSVP received by March 30). RSVP to darcheinoam.com/event/paint-night. Apr. 22 – Shomrei Torah

Sisterhood Yom Iyun. with Stern College Assistant Professor Mrs. Shoshana Schechter speaking on “Reflections Through the Mirrors of Mitzrayim: Women and the Fulfillment of Jewish Destiny.” SHOMREI TORAH, 7:30 PM. Please sign up to attend or sponsor the event at https://www.shomrei-torah.org/event/leiliyun. May 6 – Ladies' Boutique. Shop from

local vendors supporting the Yoetzet Halacha Program of Fair Lawn. Sponsorships available. DARCHEI NOAM, Sunday night, 6:30 – 9:30 PM. For more info, click here: Ladies Night.

Ahavat Achim Future EventsApr. 21 - Youth Taking Over - Part 2, for the

“Sharsheret Pink Seudat Shelishit”, sponsored by K&A Wigod (& Cayleb). Apr. 25 - Board Meeting (Tentative) Apr. 28 - TABC Alumni Reunion Apr. 29 - Journal Dinner May 19 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by

Eli Zezon in memory of Shlomoע”ה Ben Eliyahu (שלמה בן אליהו זזון נלב"ע ז סיון תשס”ד) May 23 - Board Meeting (Tentative) June 2 - Suedah Shlishit is sponsored by

Eli Zezon in memory of Baroch Mafzirע”ה  Ben Samuel (ברוך מפציר בן (שמואל נלב"ע כ"ד סיון תשנ”טJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by

the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchesterע”ה.

Friday Evening, April 13

Saturday Evening, April 14

Sunday Evening, April 15

Monday Evening, April 16

Tuesday Evening, April 17

Wednesday Evening, April 18

Thursday Evening, April 19

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Page 3: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

SUPPORT YOUR SHUL

Donate a Sefer, etc. The shul has Siddurim & Machzorim ($36) and Chumashim ($54) available to be donated.  Please contact Jeff Safier at [email protected] for details.

Yahrzeit Plaques Memorialize a loved one with a plaque for $300 for members and $450 for non-members. We will also endeavor to send you written notice of an upcoming yahrzeit, mention your loved one’s name during the public Yizkor and list the yahrzeit in the Bulletin once a year. For more information, email Larry at [email protected].

ScripScrip is available from Men’s Club. Email David at [email protected]. Pay using Paypal ([email protected]) or use Discover, MasterCard or Visa - email [email protected] for details.

MishebayrachIf you’ve made a Mishebayrach you’ve pledged to give Tzedakah on behalf of those for whom you asked Hashem's blessing. Contributions to the shul are appropriate and can be made via Paypal to [email protected], or via MasterCard, Visa or Discover by sending info to Steve Winchester (contact him at [email protected]). If by check indicate on its face “Aliyah Donation.”

David Schwitzerע”ה Social HallPlease contact Ben Lang at [email protected] to book the David Schwitzerע”ה Social Hall for an event or special occasion. $250 per simcha (members)/$325 for Associates/$400 paid in advance for non-members, plus the cost of any additional clean up (plus a $150 security/cleaning deposit refunded when the social hall is returned in the condition it started in). Private caterers must be approved in advance by the Rabbi.

Sisterhood & Men’s Club Please contact Elliot Greene at [email protected] to join the Men’s Club. To join Sisterhood, please contact Shelly at [email protected] or Renee at [email protected].

Honoraria Contributions to acquire honoraria in memory or honor of a loved one are welcome. The available Honoraria list will be provided upon request by contacting Steven Plotnick at [email protected].

Mitzvah CardsWant mitzvah cards, contact Eita Latkin at 791-8940 or [email protected]. Cost is $3 per card. Also can be ordered in bulk - ten cards for $25, which you send out yourself privately.

SUPPORT YOUR SHUL

"3

IN IYAR WE REMEMBER . . .

NAMEHEBREW

DATECANDLE

EVENING OF DEDICATOR RELATIONSHIP

Jack Schwartz 2 April 16 Kenny Levine Naomi Levine

GrandfatherFather

Harry Latkin 2 April 16 Richard Latkin Father

Zimel Wigod 3 April 17 Seymour Wigod Grandfather

Harry Abraham Rapoport 4 April 18 Sara Levine Father

Augusta S. Banner 10 April 24 Burton Banner Mother

Shulamit Michal Kustanowitz 10 April 24 Al Kustanowitz Wife

Rosalind Dorshay 16 April 30 Seymour Wigod Aunt

Martin Riskin 20 May 4 Greg Riskin Father

Gabriel Pinchas 23 May 7 Naomi Graber Father

Gital Klein 26 May 10 David Garfunkel Grandmother

Page 4: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

MISCELLANEOUS

Ahavat Achim Membership/HospitalityContact Arnie at [email protected] for membership details. For Shabbat hospitality contact Melanie at [email protected].

Bikkur Cholim/Chesed Committee If someone needs a visit/assistance, contact Sara at [email protected] or Mary Lisa at [email protected].

Personal AnnouncementsVarious life cycle events related to members are announced in the bulletin (e.g., births, bar and bat mitzvahs, weddings and deaths, as well as travel to/from Israel to study). We also welcome new members. Other personal announcements are not appropriate except as part of the bulletin’s dedication (a $36 cost - $54 with photo).

Numbers & InfoERUV – To subscribe for updates, email

[email protected]. Check status at https://groups.io/g/fairlawneruv or call 201-254-9190. MIKVAH – 201-796-0350. At Shomrei

Torah, 9 PM–10:30 PM, Motzei Shabbat from 1¼ hours after Shabbat ends for 1½ hours. Kaylim Mikvah: Sun. 10 AM-3 PM TWITTER: AhavatAchimFL FACEBOOK: facebook.com/groups/

ahavat.achim/ INSTAGRAM: instagram.com/

ahavatachimfl/?hl=en FLICKR: flickr.com/photos/

ahavatachim/albums

Shul CalendarTo add events to the shul calendar

email Larry at [email protected]

"4

Shirley Vann has dedicated this week’s Covenant & Conversation (used with permission of the Office of Rabbi Sacks) in memory of her beloved mother Necha bat Yitzchokע”ה.

You can help Ahavat Achim's finances and it won't cost you a cent! Just make your regular Amazon purchases via this link: https://smile.amazon.com/. After

a one-time set up designating Congregation Ahavat Achim of Fair Lawn as your preferred charity, nothing more for you to do except make your regular Amazon purchases. • Amazon will donate 0.5% of the price of your eligible AmazonSmile purchases to Ahavat Achim. • AmazonSmile is the same Amazon you know. Same products, same prices, same service.

Answers to Points To Ponder (2nd) The glory of God appeared to

the whole nation, resembling the Revelation at Sinai, and Aaron is performing the inauguration ceremony.  (3rd) The prohibition to perform the

Temple service while intoxicated. (5th) He didn't eat the sin offering

because he was in mourning. (7th) You should be holy because I

am holy. So you must distinguish between the tamei (impure) and the tahor (pure).Points To Ponder (Answers

Below) (2nd aliyah) What happens at the

end of the mishkan inauguration process? What's the significance in light of the Golden Calf ? (3rd) What's the first commandment

given to the Kohanim after the death of Nadav and Avihu? (5th) What did Aaron do that caused

the first machloket in Jewish history? (7th) What reason for the laws of

kashrut are presented in this aliyah?

Page 5: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

2:00-4:00 PM | FAIR LAWN JEWISH CENTER 10-10 Norma Ave, Fair Lawn, NJ 07410

SUNDAY, APRIL 15

Hands-on projects creating dog toys for Bergen Protect and Rescue, making cards for

American soldiers that will be distributed by the Major Stuart Adam Wolfer Institute, re-purposing

t-shirts to create bags for Leket Israel and assembling snack packages for children to be

distributed by the newly opened Jewish Family and Children’s Services Fair Lawn food pantry.

For more information, please contact 201-244-6702, [email protected] or visit www.areyvut.org

Free event! | All ages welcomeFirst 100 attendees will receive a National Mitzvah Day shirt.

The Chesed Fair is cosponsored by Ahavat Achim, Darchei Noam, Glen Rock Jewish Center and Shomrei Torah.

In conjunction with National Mitzvah Day and Good Deeds Day

Page 6: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

2:00-4:00 PM | FAIR LAWN JEWISH CENTER 10-10 Norma Ave, Fair Lawn, NJ 07410

SUNDAY, APRIL 15

Hands-on projects creating dog toys for Bergen Protect and Rescue, making cards for

American soldiers that will be distributed by the Major Stuart Adam Wolfer Institute, re-purposing

t-shirts to create bags for Leket Israel and assembling snack packages for children to be

distributed by the newly opened Jewish Family and Children’s Services Fair Lawn food pantry.

For more information, please contact 201-244-6702, [email protected] or visit www.areyvut.org

Free event! | All ages welcomeFirst 100 attendees will receive a National Mitzvah Day shirt.

The Chesed Fair is cosponsored by Ahavat Achim, Darchei Noam, Glen Rock Jewish Center and Shomrei Torah.

In conjunction with National Mitzvah Day and Good Deeds Day

Page 7: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester
Page 8: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester
Page 9: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

בס״ד18-25 Saddle River Road Fair Lawn, New Jersey 07410

www.ahavatachim.org Ely Shestack, Rabbi

March 12, 2018

Dear Friends and Members, It is with great pleasure that we announce that Ahavat Achim Orthodox Congregation of Fair Lawn will hold its 40th Anniversary Journal Dinner on April 29, 2018. This year, as our shul celebrates its 40th year, we are pleased to honor Arnie and Randi Spier, a family that has been an integral part of the shul since their arrival in Fair Lawn almost three decades ago. Arnie and Randi joined our shul in 1988. Through the years, both Arnie and Randi diligently worked to better our synagogue and have served our community in many capacities. Arnie is a past President, Vice President, and has served multiple terms as a board member and has worked on numerous subcommittees. He also served on multiple Rabbi Search Committees and is currently Chairman of the Marketing Committee and is the first point of contact for our new members. Randi has served as Sisterhood Treasurer, a member of the Marketing Committee, multiple Rabbi Search Committees, and Chairwoman of the Kiddush Committee. She has served on the synagogue board for several years and has orchestrated innumerous Shabbat meals wherein the entire community gets together for relaxing evenings of good food and comradery. What many of our members view as a carefree Shabbat dinner is only possible because of the planning and tireless work that Randi does for our benefit. Arnie and Randi are the proud parents of Jeremy (and Shira) and Brett. They currently have two adorable grandchildren: Jonah and Ava. As important as it is to honor and thank our dedicated members, please remember that our Annual Dinner is our largest single fundraiser event. Anyone, who has followed the shul’s finances, knows how critical the success of this dinner is to our budget. To attend the dinner, you can either solicit ads from your local merchants and family members, or you can place your personal ads totaling $400. This evening should be a celebration with 100% participation. It will be a fun night with laughter, good food and drink, where we celebrate our community and honor Arnie and Randi. Attached is an ad blank for your solicitations and personal use. If you prefer printed ad blanks, they will be available in the shul lobby or feel free to email [email protected]). This year you can also place an ad or download the ad blank via the shul website at: ahavatachim.org/event/2018JournalDinner . Remember the more ads that come in; the less follow ups you will receive. The dinner is less than 2 months away, so we need to start soliciting immediately. A separate mailing of the dinner invitation will be forthcoming. Please start soliciting ads and submit them to us ([email protected]) as soon as possible.

Aryeh Brenenson President

Page 10: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

Please check appropriate box: PARCHMENT PAGE $3600 DIAMOND PAGE $2500 PLATINUM PAGE $1800 GOLD PAGE $1000 SILVER PAGE $750 FULL PAGE $400** HALF PAGE $250 QUARTER PAGE $125 EIGHTH PAGE (business card) $75 LISTING $50

Make checks payable to: AHAVAT ACHIM

**$400 donation entitles you to 2 reservations for the dinner**

YOUR CONTRIBUTION IS TAX DEDUCTIBLE TO THE EXTENT ALLOWED BY LAW

TO PAY BY VISA OR MASTERCARD:

Name on Card: ____________________________________________________________________________

Amount: $________; Card #: ________________________; Exp. Date: _______ Sec Code: _________

Billing Address: ________________________________________; Phone #: ___________________

Authorized Signature: ____________________________________________________________________

Please return this ad blank with your check to: DAVID GARFUNKEL, 12-56 LYLE TERRACE, FAIR LAWN, NJ 07410

THE FINAL AD DEADLINE IS APRIL 15, 2018

PLEASE PRINT AD CLEARLY OR ATTACH BUSINESS CARD (use a separate ad bland for each ad) Ad copy can be emailed to [email protected]

NAME ADDRESS PHONE ( ) SOLICITED BY:

Special Recognition Pages: Rabbi’s page ($18 per family) _____________________________________ Memorial Listing ($10 per name)

Children’s Listing ($5 per child) Grandchildren’s Listing ($5 per grandchild)

Page 11: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

בס״ד

Orthodox Congregation of Fair Lawn

40th Anniversary Journal Dinner

Honoring

Randi and Arnie Spier

Sunday, April 29, 2018 14 Iyar 5778

Page 12: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

When Weakness Becomes Strength

Shemini 2018 / 5778

“Come near to the altar and offer your sin offering and your burnt offering and make atonement for

yourself and the people; sacrifice the offering that is for the people and make atonement for them, as

the Lord has commanded.” (Lev. 9:7)

The sages were puzzled by the instruction, “Come near.” This seems to imply that Aaron had until then

kept a distance from the altar. Why so? Rashi gives the following explanation:

Aaron was ashamed and fearful of approaching the altar. Moses said to him: “Why are you ashamed? It

was for this that you were chosen.”

There is a name for this syndrome, coined in 1978 by two clinical psychologists, Pauline Clance and

Suzanne Imes. They called it the imposter syndrome. People who suffer from it feel that they do not deserve the 1

success they have achieved. They attribute it not to their effort and ability but to luck, or timing, or to the fact that

they have deceived others into thinking that they are better than they actually are. It turns out to be surprisingly

widespread, and particularly so among high achievers. Research has shown that around 40 per cent of successful

people do not believe they deserve their success, and that as many as 70 per cent have felt this way at some time

or other.

Pauline Clance and Suzanne Ament Imes, “The Imposter Phenomenon in High Achieving Women: Dynamics and Therapeutic 1

Intervention.” Psychotherapy: Theory, Research & Practice, vol. 15, no. 3, 1978, pp. 241–247.

�When Weakness Becomes Strength " Shemini 57781

Page 13: הליפתה תעשב רבדל אל אנ SHABBAT SHEMINIJune 16 - Suedah Shlishit sponsored by the Winchesters to commemorate the first yahrzeit of Steve’s father David Winchester

However, as one might imagine, Rashi is telling us something deeper. Aaron was not simply someone

lacking in self-confidence. There was something specific that he must have had in mind on that day that he was

inducted into the role of High Priest. For Aaron had been left in charge of the people while Moses was up the

mountain receiving the Torah. That was when the sin of the Golden Calf took place.

Reading that narrative, it is hard to avoid the conclusion that it was Aaron’s weakness that allowed it to

happen. It was he who suggested that the people give him their gold ornaments, he who fashioned them into a

calf, and he who built an altar before it (Ex. 32:1-6). When Moses saw the Golden Calf and challenged Aaron

–“What did these people do to you, that you brought upon them this great sin?”– he replied, evasively, “They

gave me the gold, and I threw it into the fire, and out came this calf!”

This was a man profoundly (and rightly) uncomfortable with his role in one of the most disastrous

episodes in the Torah, and now he was being called to atone not only for himself but for the entire people. Was

this not hypocrisy? Was he not himself a sinner? How could he stand before God and the people and assume the

role of the holiest of men? No wonder he felt like an imposter and was ashamed and fearful of approaching the

altar.

Moses, however, did not simply say something that would boost his self-confidence. He said something

much more radical and life-changing: “It was for this that you were chosen.” The task of a High Priest is to atone for

people’s sins. It was his role, on Yom Kippur, to confess his

wrongs and failings, then those of his household, then those of

the people as a whole (Lev. 16:11-17). It was his responsibility

to plead for forgiveness.

“That,” implied Moses, “is why you were chosen. You know what sin is like. You know what it is to feel

guilt. You more than anyone else understand the need for repentance and atonement. You have felt the cry of

your soul to be cleansed, purified and wiped free of the stain of transgression. What you think of as your greatest

weakness will become, in this role you are about to assume, your greatest strength.”

How did Moses know this? Because he had experienced something similar himself. When God told him to

confront Pharaoh and lead the Israelites to freedom, he repeatedly insisted that he could not do so. Reread his

response to God’s call to lead the Israelites out of Egypt (Ex. chapters 3-4), and they sound like someone

radically convinced of his inadequacies. “Who am I?” “They won’t believe in me.” Above all, he kept repeating

that he could not speak before a crowd, something absolutely necessary in a leader. He was not an orator. He did

not have the voice of command:

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“Moses did not simply say something that would boost his

self-confidence. He said something much more radical

and life-changing.”

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Then Moses said to the Lord, “Please, my Lord, I am not a man of words, not yesterday, not the day before

and not since You have spoken to Your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.” (Ex. 4:10) Moses said to

the Lord, “Look, the Israelites do not listen to me. How then will Pharaoh listen to me? Besides, I have

uncircumcised lips.” (Ex. 6:12).

Moses had a speech defect. To him that was a supreme disqualification from being a mouthpiece for the

Divine word. What he did not yet understand is that this was one of the reasons God chose him. When Moses

spoke the words of God, people knew he was not speaking his own words in his own voice. Someone else was speaking

through him. This seems to have been the case for Isaiah and Jeremiah, both of whom were doubtful of their

ability to speak and who became among the most eloquent of prophets. 2

The people who can sway crowds with their oratory are generally speaking not prophets. Often they are,

or become, dictators and tyrants. They use their power of speech to acquire more dangerous forms of power. God

does not choose people who speak with their own voice, telling the crowds what they want to hear. He chooses

people who are fully aware of their inadequacies, who stammer literally or metaphorically, who speak not

because they want to but because they have to, and who tell people what they do not want to hear, but what they

must hear if they are to save themselves from catastrophe. What Moses thought was his greatest weakness was, in

fact, one of his greatest strengths.

The point here is not a simple “I’m OK, You’re OK” acceptance of weakness. That is not what Judaism

is about. The point is the struggle. Moses and Aaron in their different ways had to wrestle with themselves.

Moses was not a natural leader. Aaron was not a natural priest. Moses had to accept that one of his most

important qualifications was what nowadays we would call

his low self image, but what, operating from a completely

different mindset, the Torah calls his humility. Aaron had to

understand that his own experience of sin and failure made

him the ideal representative of a people conscious of their

own sin and failure. Feelings of inadequacy – the imposter syndrome – can be bad news or good news depending

on what you do with them. Do they lead you to depression and despair? Or do they lead you to work at your

weaknesses and turn them into strengths?

The key, according to Rashi in this week’s parsha, is the role Moses played at this critical juncture in

Aaron’s life. He had faith in Aaron even when Aaron lacked faith in himself. That is the role God Himself played, more

than once, in Moses’ life. And that is the role God plays in all our lives if we are truly open to Him. I have often

said that the mystery at the heart of Judaism is not our faith in God. It is God’s faith in us.

There is a striking secular example: Winston Churchill had both a lisp and a stutter and though he fought against both, they 2

persisted long into adulthood. Because of this, he had to think carefully in advance about his major speeches. He was fastidious in writing or dictating them beforehand, rewriting key phrases until the last moment. He used short words wherever possible, made dramatic use of pauses and silences, and developed an almost poetic use of rhythm. The result was not only that he became a great speaker. His speeches, especially over the radio during the Second World War, were a major factor in rousing the spirit of the nation. In the words of Edward Murrow he “mobilised the English language and sent it into battle.”

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“Feelings of inadequacy can be good news if they can lead you to

work at your weaknesses and turn them into strengths.”

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This then is the life-changing idea: what we think of as our greatest weakness can become, if we wrestle with it,

our greatest strength. Think of those who have suffered tragedy and then devote their lives to alleviating the

suffering of others. Think of those who, conscious of their failings, use that consciousness to help others

overcome their own sense of failure.

What makes Tanakh so special is its total candour about humanity. Its heroes –Moses, Aaron, Isaiah,

Jeremiah – all knew times when they felt like failures, “imposters.” They had their moments of dark despair. But

they kept going. They refused to be defeated. They knew that a sense of inadequacy can bring us closer to God,

as King David said: “My sacrifice [i.e. what I bring as an offering to You] O God, is a broken spirit; a broken and

contrite heart you, God, will not despise” (Ps. 51:19).

Better by far to know you are imperfect than to believe you are perfect. God loves us and believes in us

despite, and sometimes because of, our imperfections. Our weaknesses make us human; wrestling with them

makes us strong.

Shabbat shalom,

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LIFE-CHANGING IDEAS IN SEFER VAYIKRA

• VAYIKRA: For each of us God has a task. Discerning that task, hearing God’s call, is what gives a life meaning and purpose.

• TZAV: The more you celebrate the good, the more good you discover that is worthy of celebration. meaning and purpose.

• SHEMINI: What you think of as your greatest weakness can become, if you wrestle with it, your greatest strength.

LIFE-CHANGING IDEA #25

“What you think of as your greatest weakness can become, if you wrestle with it,

your greatest strength.”