the leadership tutorial: improving your ability to stand and deliver

MA Full‐day Tutorial 6/3/2013 8:30 AM

"The Leadership Tutorial: Improving Your Ability to Stand and Deliver"

Presented by:

Andy Kaufman Institute for Leadership Excellence & Development, Inc.

Brought to you by:

340 Corporate Way, Suite 300, Orange Park, FL 32073 888‐268‐8770 ∙ 904‐278‐0524 ∙ [email protected] ∙ www.sqe.com

Andy Kaufman Institute for Leadership Excellence and Development, Inc.

Andy Kaufman works worldwide with people who are struggling with how to lead teams and deliver projects. Andy helps professionals get focused, take action, and deliver results. His keynotes, workshops, and executive coaching services have reached tens of thousands of people from hundreds of companies, helping them deliver their projects, become more confident leaders, and achieve the results they desire while maintaining a balanced life. Andy authored Navigating the Winds of Change: Staying on Course in Business & in Life, Shining the Light on The Secret, and the e-book, How to Organize Your Inbox & Get Rid of E-Mail Clutter. He is the host of The People and Projects Podcast. Learn more about Andy at i-leadonline.com.

The Leadership Tutorial

2013, Institute for Leadership Excellence & Development Inc. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying or recording, or by any information storage or retrieval system, or otherwise, without written permission from the Institute for Leadership Excellence & Development Inc. (I-LEAD). For permission or more information, please send requests to I-LEAD at the address below. All brand names, product names, and trademarks are owned by their respective companies and referred to herein for identification purposes only. For general information on other products and services offered by the Institute, please contact us or visit our website at www.i-leadonline.com. 765 Pheasant Ridge Court Suite 101 Lake Zurich, IL 60047 USA Telephone: 866-884-5323, [email protected] www.i-leadonline.com

The Leadership Tutorial Module 13

Table of Contents

Module 1 Introduction ........................................................................... 6

How to Get the Most Out of This Tutorial .............................................. 7 Workshop Topics ............................................................................... 8

Module 2 Leadership & Management ....................................................... 9

Group Discussion: Identifying Leaders ................................................ 10 Group Discussion: Leading in Your Organization, Part I ........................ 11 Team Discussion: Leadership vs. Management .................................... 12 Leadership Horizons ......................................................................... 14 Leadership & Management Questions ................................................. 16 Group Discussion: Leading in Your Organization, Part II ....................... 17

Module 3 Developing Our Leadership Skills ............................................ 18

Our Responsibility ............................................................................ 20 Blueprint for Developing Capability .................................................... 21 Who Does the Leader Manage? .......................................................... 22 Dee Hock’s Leadership 101 ............................................................... 23

Things done to you that you abhorred .......................................... 23 Things done to you that you loved ............................................... 23

Feedback is a Gift ............................................................................ 24 Leadership Practices Inventory (LPI®) ............................................... 25 CPI 260™ Leadership Assessment ..................................................... 26

CPI 260™ Leadership Characteristics ............................................... 26 Example CPI 260™ Team Analysis ..................................................... 27 Leadership Self-Appraisal ................................................................. 28

Leadership Self-Appraisal Form ...................................................... 29 Leadership Feedback Form ............................................................. 30

Developing Our Leadership Skills ....................................................... 31 Leadership Skills for Particular Focus .................................................. 33

Module 4 Developing Teams That Deliver .............................................. 34

Leadership Requires Followership ...................................................... 35 Team Models ................................................................................... 36

Tuckman’s Team Development Model .............................................. 36 ‘On Target’ Team Model ................................................................. 37

How is trust developed? .............................................................. 37 Team Charter .................................................................................. 39 Example Team Charter ..................................................................... 40


Purpose Statement ....................................................................... 41 Team Player Roles and Responsibilities ............................................ 42 What We Value ............................................................................. 45

Example team values ................................................................. 45 Team Key Performance Indicators ................................................... 46

More Than Just Working Well Together ............................................... 47 Organizational Entropy ..................................................................... 48 How Organizational Entropy Manifests Itself ........................................ 49 How Aspiring Leaders Battle Organizational Entropy ............................. 50 Leadership and Entropy .................................................................... 51 The Birth of the Outlaw Team ............................................................ 53 Outlaw Team Meeting ...................................................................... 54 Additional Ideas .............................................................................. 56 Summary ....................................................................................... 57

Module 5 Managing Conflict ................................................................. 58

Dealing with Conflict ........................................................................ 59 Making This Personal........................................................................ 60 Defining Conflict .............................................................................. 61 Exercise: All About Conflict ............................................................... 62 Learning About Conflict .................................................................... 63 The 5 Conflict Handling Modes ........................................................... 64 Exercise: Considering the Modes ....................................................... 65 Understanding Your Style ................................................................. 66 Competing ...................................................................................... 67

Situations for Using the Competing Style ......................................... 67 Key Skills to Utilize the Competing Style .......................................... 67 Positional Power vs. Personal Power ................................................ 68

Collaborating .................................................................................. 69 Situations for Using the Collaborating Style ...................................... 69 Key Skills to Utilize the Collaborating Style ...................................... 69

Accommodating ............................................................................... 70 Situations for Using the Accommodating Style .................................. 70 Key Skills to Utilize the Accommodating Style ................................... 70

Avoiding ......................................................................................... 71 Situations for Using the Avoiding Style ............................................ 71 Key Skills to Utilize the Avoiding Style ............................................. 71

Compromising ................................................................................. 72 Situations for Using the Compromising Style .................................... 72 Key Skills to Utilize the Compromising Style ..................................... 72


Exercise: Understanding the Modes ................................................... 73 The What-If-How Formula ................................................................ 74 What: Unbundling the Issue .............................................................. 75

Fundamental Attribution Error ........................................................ 76 Key Questions to Ask .................................................................... 77

If: Engage or Not to Engage? ............................................................ 78 How: Planning the Conversation ........................................................ 79

DISARMing the Conflict .................................................................. 80 DISARM: Describe ........................................................................ 81 DISARM: Acknowledge with “I” Statements ..................................... 83 DISARM: Stop and Seek Perspective with a Question ........................ 84 DISARM: Action ........................................................................... 85 DISARM: Reaffirm ........................................................................ 87 DISARM: Maintain Accountability ................................................... 87

Pitfalls during DISARM ................................................................... 88 Exercise: Practicing the Process ......................................................... 89

Part A. Scenarios .......................................................................... 89 Part B. Real World Observation ....................................................... 90 Part C. Making this Personal ........................................................... 91

Module 6 Improving Our Influence ........................................................ 92

Definitions of Influence and Power ..................................................... 93 Power and Followers ........................................................................ 95 Who Do You Need to Influence?......................................................... 95 Raven & French Powers .................................................................... 96 Ideas to Increase Your Influence ....................................................... 98 Cialdini’s Weapons of Influence ......................................................... 99 Influencing Without Authority .......................................................... 101 Barriers to Influencing Without Authority .......................................... 103 Taking Action ................................................................................ 103 Influence Scenarios Exercise ........................................................... 104

Gold Sheet ...................................................................................... 105

Tutorial Follow-Up Form .................................................................... 107


Module 1 Introduction Welcome to The Leadership Tutorial, a customized conference tutorial designed to help you grow in your ability to lead in your organization. We fundamentally believe that success rises and falls on our ability to develop leaders at all levels of the organization. Thank you for participating!

Facilitator Andy Kaufman

E-Mail Address [email protected]

Time

Breaks

Lunch


Introduction

How to Get the Most Out of This Tutorial

Like most learning opportunities, you tend to get out of it what you put into it. To get the most out of this workshop we recommend you: • Engage! Our session will be highly interactive. Jump into the

conversation with your questions and comments.

• Keep your Gold Sheet handy! The Gold Sheet is on page 105, and is provided to help you take specific actions as a result of our time together.

• Have fun! Our learning approach is specifically designed for us all to have fun while we learn. You are invited to join the facilitator in keeping the learning environment fun as we learn to lead together.


Introduction

Workshop Topics

Leadership and management are broad areas of learning that cover a significant number of topics. Our focus today will be:

• Leadership vs. Management

• Developing Our Leadership Skills

• Developing Teams That Deliver

• Managing Conflict

• Improving Our Influence


Leadership & Management

Module 2 Leadership & Management

“Leadership defines what the future should look like, aligns people with that vision, and inspires them to make it happen despite the obstacles.” John Kotter “Leadership is a relationship between those who aspire to lead and those who choose to follow.” Jim Kouzes and Barry Posner “Leadership means maximizing potential—in yourself and in the people you lead.” Justin Menkes “Leadership is influence.” John Maxwell “Leadership is an intangible quality with no definition.” Dilbert



Group Discussion: Identifying Leaders

Often we recognize leadership when we see it, but it can be difficult to define. Think of two people who are leaders: one in the general public and one in your organization. What are the characteristics that make each of them leaders?

Leaders in the general public:

Leaders in your organization:

Characteristics of identified leaders:



Group Discussion: Leading in Your Organization, Part I

Think about your position. Think about your peers and your team members. Think about your overall organization.

What are some examples of when you need to lead?

What were some of the biggest challenges you had when first becoming a manager?



Team Discussion: Leadership vs. Management

Is leadership different from management? Are they just different ways of saying the same thing? Does it even matter? In teams, discuss the following question:

How would you differentiate a leader from a manager?



The Manager… The Leader… Administers Innovates

Maintains Develops

Accepts reality Investigates it

Focuses on systems & structures

Focuses on people

Relies on control Inspires trust

Has a short-range view Has a long-range perspective

Asks how and when Asks what and why

Has eye on the bottom line Has eye on the horizon

Imitates Originates

Accepts the status quo Challenges it

Is the classic good soldier Is his or her own person. Learning to Lead: A Workbook on Becoming a Leader, Warren Bennis, pg. 9, Addison Wesley, 1997 NOTE: For a discussion on this topic, check out my interview with management guru Henry Mintzberg at http://www.peopleandprojectspodcast.com/index.php/podcast-episodes/35-episodes/159-management-its-not-what-you-think-an-interview-with-henry-mintzberg.html

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Leadership Horizons

It is so easy to get caught up into the distractions of day-to-day demands. Do effective leaders have different horizons that they focus on? Consider the following questions with respect to your current position:

What percent of your time is spent thinking about issues 6-12 months out?

What do you think it should be?



Leadership Horizons (continued)

The reality is that nearly anyone in a leadership position must spend time in the here and now. However, effective leaders also spend intentional time scanning the horizon. Depending on one’s level in the company, the focus may be further out.

• Senior Managers

o 3-5 years o Focus on strategic

direction

• Middle Managers

o 1-2 years o Focus on building

capability

• Front-line Managers

o 6 months to a year o Focus on strategic delivery

• Team Members

o Day-to-day delivery What are the benefits of focusing on the appropriate horizon? How about the consequences of not doing so?



Leadership & Management Questions

If leaders require followers, then one of the first jobs of a leader is to help their followers know where they are going. We suggest that leaders and managers focus on different questions.

Three questions that leaders answer are:

• Where? Where are we going?

• Why? What are the benefits? What’s in it for the company? What’s in it for our team?

• What? At a high-level, what needs to be done? What are roles and responsibilities?

Three questions that managers answer are:

• How? Developing the detailed plan to execute the vision.

• Who? Aligning skills, interests, & availability to execute the plan.

• When? Sequencing the work for efficiency.



Group Discussion: Leading in Your Organization, Part II

Which leadership characteristics are most often exhibited today?

Which ones, as a team within your organization, are less consistently demonstrated?

What makes it difficult to focus longer term?

Which of the leader and manager questions get too much attention? Not enough?

What makes it difficult to be an effective leader and manager in your environment?


Developing Our Leadership Skills

Module 3 Developing Our Leadership Skills

“Do you want to learn how to lead other people? Start by learning to lead yourself.” Andy Kaufman (Author, executive coach) “Know your enemy and know yourself and you can fight a hundred battles without disaster.” Sun Tzu (Chinese general, author) “Leadership is the capacity and will to rally men and women to a common purpose and the character which inspires confidence.” Bernard Montgomery (British Field Marshal)



Source: How To Win Friends and Influence People

Success is

professional knowledge

your “ability to express ideas, to assume leadership,

and to arouse enthusiasm among people.”

__

_____ ________

__



Our Responsibility

As a leader in your organization, you don’t have the option to simply lead or manage. You must do both. At the core, we are responsible for:

• Delivering Results. Delivering on

our commitments is not an option. Consistent successful project delivery requires skills related to leadership and management.

• Developing Capability. It’s completely insufficient to define success as only delivering results. We must develop capability.

What do you think “developing capability” means?



Blueprint for Developing Capability

Developing capability is a broad topic. Based on our work with hundreds of executive coaching clients, we developed the following Blueprint for Developing Capability:

• Developing your personal leadership skills. Have you ever watched

yourself on video and said, “I look like that? That’s what my voice sounds like?” Often we don’t have a clear perception of ourselves, objectively understanding our strengths and areas to improve. You cannot long lead others until you well know yourself. Developing more capability in your organization begins with you.

• Developing your team. It’s not enough to only develop your skills. You must actively develop the people that have been entrusted to you. Just because people are put together on a team doesn’t make them a team. A key part of your job is to help them become a team and to increase their leadership bandwidth.

• Developing relationships. Unfortunately schools often don’t teach us the critical fact that much of business is done on the basis of relationships. Aspiring managers are too often taught their job is to manage their subordinates when, in fact, we need to be intentionally developing relationships throughout the organization.

• Developing sustainable & scalable processes. In addition to the “people” side of capability, successful leaders also focus on constantly improving processes, making sure they are sustainable and scalable. In an environment of constant change and heavy demands, this requires your support and leadership.



Who Does the Leader Manage?

Dee Hock, founder and former CEO of VISA insightfully directs aspiring leaders where to focus their time:

"If you look to lead, invest at least 40% of your time managing yourself -- your ethics, character, principles, purpose, motivation, and conduct.

Invest at least 30% managing those with authority over you, and 15% managing your peers.

Use the remainder to induce those you 'work for' to understand and practice the theory. I use the terms 'work for' advisedly, for if you don't understand that you should be working for your mislabeled 'subordinates,' you haven't understood anything.

Lead yourself, lead your superiors, lead your peers, and free your people to do the same. All else is trivia.”

Self, 40%

Up, 30%

Peers, 15% Our

Teams, 15%

Source: Leadership Short Course (from Dee Hock, FastCompany, October/November 1996)



Dee Hock’s Leadership 101

"Make a careful list of all things done to you that you abhorred. Don't do them to others, ever. Make another list of things done for you that you loved. Do them for others, always."

In teams, discuss examples of things previous managers have done that you (in Hock’s terms) abhorred and loved. Make note of ideas you think of or hear from others that you should start (or stop) doing.

Things done to you that you abhorred

Things done to you that you loved



Feedback is a Gift

Though it does not always feel that way, feedback is a gift. Unfortunately it’s a gift we often hold back from giving, or at least giving well. Similarly, it’s often not received in a way that we can benefit from it.

Learning to give and receive constructive feedback is not a nice luxury for leaders. It is critical to developing capability in our organization.

What are some examples of when feedback is truly a gift?

From whom is it most difficult to receive critical feedback?



Leadership Practices Inventory (LPI®)

The Leadership Practices Inventory (LPI®) is a 360-degree assessment instrument that helps leaders assess the extent to which they use extensively researched leadership practices. The LPI is a questionnaire with thirty behavioral statements—six for each of The Five Practices—that takes 10 to 20 minutes to complete. Leaders complete the LPI-Self, rating themselves on the frequency with which they think they engage in each of the thirty behaviors. Five to ten other people—typically selected by the leaders—complete the LPI-Observer questionnaire, rating the leaders on the frequency with which they think they engage in each behavior. Respondents can indicate their relationship to the leader—manager, co-worker or peer, direct report, or other observer—but, with the exception of the leader's manager, all the observers' feedback is anonymous. Here’s a sample portion of an LPI report, showing how the person rated themselves, an average of the observers, and ratings from each observer:

Leadership Practices Inventory, LPI, and The Five Practices of Exemplary Leadership are registered trademarks of John Wiley and Sons.



CPI 260™ Leadership Assessment

Building on the exceptional 50-year history, validity, and reliability of the California Psychological Inventory™ (CPI™) instrument, the CPI 260™ assessment opens a new window into people's strengths and opportunities for development. This powerful, business-focused assessment transforms the venerable CPI instrument into one of today's most popular leadership development and management training tools. *This report is based on data collected from the Center for Creative Leadership® (CCL®) from more than 5,600 participants enrolled in CCL's Leadership Development Program from 1995 to 1996. CPI 260™ and the CPI 260 logo are registered trademarks of CPP, Inc.

CPI 260™ Leadership Characteristics The following leadership characteristics are measured by the CPI 260™ assessment: • Self-Awareness • Self-Control • Resilience • Use of Power and Authority • Comfort with Organizational

Structures • Responsibility and Accountability • Decisiveness • Interpersonal Skill • Understanding Others

• Capacity for Collaboration • Working with and Through Others • Creativity • Handling Sensitive Problems • Action Orientation • Self-Confidence • Managing Change • Influence • Comfort with Visibility



Example CPI 260™ Team Analysis

ITED 2006CPI Scales Summary

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45

50

55

60

65

70

Dom

inance

Capacity for S

tatus

Sociability

Social P

resence

Self-A

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Independence

Em

pathy

Responsibility

Social C

onformity

Self-C

ontrol

Good Im

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Com

munality

Well-being

Tolerance

Achievem

ent via Conform

ance

Achievem

ent via Independence

Conceptual Fluency

Insightfulness

Flexibility

Sensitivity

Managerial P

otential

Work O

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Creative Tem

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Leadership

Am

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Law E

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Leadership Self-Appraisal

A helpful way to learn more about your current strengths and opportunities to improve is through assessments and other feedback instruments. On page 29 we have a Leadership Self-Appraisal form you can use.

Of course the problem with any “self-appraisal” is the word “self”. Perhaps the greatest value from an instrument such as this is to get frank, confidential feedback from others who observe you leading and managing on a regular basis. We have also included on page 30 a form that you can copy and give to others so you can benefit from their feedback.

You can get additional “Leadership Self-Appraisal” and “Leadership Feedback Forms” by contacting us via e-mail.

In addition, we can provide a spreadsheet (similar to what is shown below) that can be used to track the responses. Instructions are included in the spreadsheet. In particular, pay attention to where responses diverge from your self-appraisal (either higher or lower).

Compared to# Characteristic Self A B C D E F G H I J Average Self1 Maintain complete integrity.2 Sense of urgency & bias for taking action.3 Excellent personal organization skills.4 Drive to learn.5 Skilled at influencing without authority.6 Good problem solver.7 Reputation for delivering results.8 Recognized as being customer focused.9 Deep understanding of our business.

10 Manage expectations well.11 Effectively deal with conflict.12 Seek out opportunities for more responsibility.13 Good self-control (not too much, not too little)14 Recognize risks and manage them well.15 Optimistic and present themselves with confidence.16 Reputation for managing change well.17 Well developed "people skills".18 Share decision-making and delegate well, when appropriate.19 Sensitive to others' feelings but can make timely tough decisions.20 Known for being accountable (and holding others accountable as well).

Total

Responses from Feedback Forms

Leadership Feedback Form Trackerfor (your name here)

www.i-leadonline.com

Leadership Self-Appraisal Form On a scale of 1 to 10 (where 1 is “Almost Never” and 10 is “Nearly Always”), circle the number that represents how you believe others would rate each statement. # Characteristic Almost Never Nearly Always

1. I maintain complete integrity. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

2. I have a sense of urgency & bias for taking action. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

3. I have excellent personal organization skills. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

4. I demonstrate a drive to learn. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

5. I take care of myself with a good diet, adequate rest, and regular exercise. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

6. I am skilled at influencing without authority. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

7. I am known as a good problem solver. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

8. I have a reputation for delivering results. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

9. I am recognized as being customer focused. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

10. I have a deep understanding of our business. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

11. I am known for managing expectations well. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

12. I effectively deal with conflict. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

13. I seek out opportunities for more responsibility. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

14. I have good self-control (not too much, not too little) 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

15. I recognize risks and manage them well. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

16. I am optimistic and present myself with confidence. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

17. I have a reputation for managing change well. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

18. I have well developed “people skills”. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

19. I share decision-making and delegate well, when appropriate. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

20. I am sensitive to others’ feelings but can make timely tough decisions. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

21. I ask for feedback on how my actions impact other people’s performance. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

22. I am known for being accountable (and holding others accountable as well). 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

www.i-leadonline.com

Leadership Feedback Form On a scale of 1 to 10 (where 1 is “Almost Never” and 10 is “Nearly Always”), circle the number that represents how you rate each statement for the person requesting feedback. # Characteristic Almost Never Nearly Always

1. They maintain complete integrity. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

2. They have a sense of urgency & bias for taking action. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

3. They have excellent personal organization skills. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

4. They demonstrate a drive to learn. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

5. They take care of themselves with a good diet, adequate rest, and regular exercise. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

6. They are skilled at influencing without authority. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

7. They are a good problem solver. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

8. They have a reputation for delivering results. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

9. They are recognized as being customer focused. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

10. They have a deep understanding of our business. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

11. They manage expectations well. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

12. They effectively deal with conflict. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

13. They seek out opportunities for more responsibility. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

14. They have good self-control (not too much, not too little) 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

15. They recognize risks and manage them well. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

16. They are optimistic and present themselves with confidence. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

17. They have a reputation for managing change well. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

18. They have well developed “people skills”. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

19. They share decision-making and delegate well, when appropriate. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

20. They are sensitive to others’ feelings but can make timely tough decisions. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

21. They ask for feedback on how their actions impact other people’s performance. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

22. They are known for being accountable (and holding others accountable as well). 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10




Using assessments and feedback forms can be an effective way to learn about your personal leadership skills.

What are some practical steps you’ve taken to develop your personal leadership skills?




Developing your personal leadership skills is a little like learning to golf. You never achieve perfection. Rather, you just want to keep getting better. Some suggestions for further developing your personal leadership skills include:

• Accepting that it’s our responsibility, not necessarily our boss’s.

Too many people wait for their boss to arrange for leadership development training. If that happens, great! But realize upfront that it is ultimately our responsibility to develop regardless of whether or not our boss takes action of not.

• Watching it being taught everyday around us. Learning about leadership in a workshop can be a great place to start, but some of the best learning unfolds around us on a daily basis. Intently observe leaders for how they deal with situations. What works for them? What doesn’t?

• Using books, podcasts, and book summaries, particularly if discussed with others. There is a seemingly endless list of resources available to you to help you grow your leadership skills. Beyond just taking the learning in, identify one or more aspiring leaders who you can discuss what you learn with. Perhaps you read through the same book or listen to the same podcast(s). Discussing it with another leader can help personalize the learning. You are invited to subscribe to the People and Projects Podcast on iTunes (http://bit.ly/ppcast) or the web (http://bit.ly/ppcastweb).

http://bit.ly/ppcast�

http://bit.ly/ppcastweb�



Leadership Skills for Particular Focus

Leadership is a broad topic. We have found our executive coaching clients achieve more when they put particular focus on the following skills:

• Influence & negotiating

• Managing conflict

• Time management

• Giving/receiving constructive feedback

• Presentation/facilitation skills

• Personality styles

• Managing projects

• Problem solving/decision making


Developing Teams That Deliver

Module 4 Developing Teams That Deliver

“Individual commitment to a group effort -- that is what makes a team work, a company work, a society work, a civilization work.” Vince Lombardi (American football coach) “Just because you put people on a team doesn’t mean they will act like a team. Teamwork is a by-product of effective leadership.” Andy Kaufman (Author, executive coach) “Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.” Military quote, source unknown



Leadership Requires Followership

"Leadership requires followership and following is an act of trust, faith in the course of the leader, and that faith can be generated only if leaders act with integrity." Lawrence M. Miller, from his book American Spirit, Visions of a New Corporate Culture.

Perhaps you recall the classic scene in the movie “Animal House”, when the character Bluto (played by John Belushi) attempts an inspirational speech, leading up to a rousing “Who’s with me? Let’s go!” while running out of the room… by himself!

It’s not rare to find someone who was an outstanding individual contributor move into a managerial role, only to find themselves alone like Bluto when the going gets tough and they need the people around them enrolled in the battle.

So, how does the leader gain followers?



Team Models

Tuckman’s Team Development Model

Tuckman1

summarized the results of over fifty studies into the following four-stage model:

Tuckman observed that after the “Form” stage teams typically go into what he referred to as Stage II: Storm. This period is characterized by intra-team conflict. Team members can become hostile or overzealous as they express their individuality and resist group formation. It could be that members recognize the challenge of the task demands and respond emotionally to the perceived impact the change will have on them. Eventually the team settles down and enters what Tuckman referred to as Stage III: Norm. As team members accept norms, their roles, and idiosyncrasies of their fellow team members, the team begins to gel, eventually leading to a team that is able to truly “Perform”.

1 Tuckman, B.W. (1965). “Developmental sequence in small groups,” Psychological Bulletin, 63(6), 384–399.

Tuckman’s Team Development Model

Form Storm Norm Perform



Team Models (continued)

‘On Target’ Team Model

References abound regarding the importance of trust when it comes to highly performing teams. The Annual Edelman Trust Barometer appropriately points out that “trust is more than a bonus; it is a tangible asset that must be created, sustained, and built upon.”2

But is it fair to say that trust is the foundation of an effective team?

Trust is unquestionably a critical component of getting a team to Tuckman’s stages of Norm and Perform. Yet we believe it is not the place to start. The leader cannot ask team members to hold hands and sing “Kumbaya” and expect to trust to simply appear!

How is trust developed?

According to Stever Robbins, “Trust isn't subject to the whims of logic.”3 Though on an individual level we may extend trust to someone without any real basis, Stephen Covey appropriately notes that “trustworthiness is the foundation of trust.”4

Yet if you trust me as a person—in my character—but do not trust my competence, you will not put your trust in me. Similarly, if team members trust you but do not sufficiently understand the purpose of the team and at least a high-level understanding of their roles and responsibilities, it is more difficult for them to develop the trust necessary to develop into a high-performing team.

Intuitively we understand that demonstrating trustworthiness takes time.

We developed the ‘On Target’ Team Model to show that Trust across a team is usually a by-product, not a starting point.

2 2006 Annual Edelman Trust Barometer, a special supplement to PR Week, http://edelman.com/image/insights/content/FullSupplement.pdf 3 “The Keys to Building Trust”, Stever Robbins, Harvard Business School “Working Knowledge”, http://hbswk.hbs.edu/item.jhtml?id=4553&t=srobbins 4 Covey, Stephen R., Principle-Centered Leadership, Free Press, 1992

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Team Models (continued)

‘On Target’ Team Model (continued)

The model starts with Purpose.

• Where are we going as a company?

• How does my team align to that?

• How does my project fit into the company strategy?

• How does our team contribute to company success?

• What is my role on this project/team?

• What do we value as a team?

• What does success look like for our team? For our project? For us an individuals on the team?

Our extensive work coaching executives over the years has found that leaders who effectively help team members sufficiently answer those questions are much more likely to develop committed followers.

Purpose

Accountability

Trust

Interdependence

Skill

Dev

elop

men

t

Process

Improvem

ent



Team Charter

Leaders can develop a Team Charter to help their team(s) establish clarity of purpose. Clearly the creation of a document is not simply the answer. The road to team destruction is paved with useless mission statements and irrelevant documentation.

The value is in the process of jointly developing and assimilating the answers to key questions of purpose. The actual content and format of a team charter are best left up to you and your team. An example Team Charter document is on page 40.



Example Team Charter

Purpose Statement (Why we exist) Team Player Roles and Responsibilities (Who is on the team and what are they responsible for?) What We Value (How we will work together) Team Key Performance Indicators (Things we will measure to know if we’re on track)



Team Charter (continued)

Purpose Statement Do you get a Dilbert-like response when you hear references to mission statements? Too often mission statements end up reading like poetry, with beautiful phrasing and inspiring thoughts, yet not relevant to the real world. In addition, there are widely varying definitions of what a mission statement is compared to a vision or purpose. Here’s the deal: we’re not talking about poetry here! Regardless of what you call it, we have found it helpful to have a couple sentences (not paragraphs) that answer "What we are here to do? Why do we exist as a team?” An effective leader makes sure their team clearly understands the answers to those questions. How do you know if you have a good purpose statement? Consider the following:

• Is it crisp (as opposed to overly wordy)?

• Do team members understand what it means (as opposed to meaningless fluff)?

• Does it inspire (as opposed to inspiring yawns)? Here are some tips to consider:

• Choose words for meaning over beauty.

• Choose clarity over cleverness.

• Avoid technical jargon and acronyms.




Team Player Roles and Responsibilities For a team to be effective, roles and responsibilities must be clear. Realistically a Team Charter is insufficient to guarantee the required clarity. However, it can provide at least a high-level understanding of who team members are and how the responsibilities are divided. There are many reasonable ways to outline team player roles and responsibilities. A common method is the use of a RACI Matrix. RACI is an acronym:

• Responsible: “The doer.” Individuals or groups with this designation are actively involved in doing the work required for the area of responsibility. The degree of responsibility is determined by the person with the “A”, and the responsibility can be shared across multiple people and groups.

• Accountable: “The buck stops here.” This is for the person (or people) with sign-off authority for the area of responsibility. Though everyone with an “R” has some degree of accountability, the “A’s” have ultimate authority and veto power. It’s usually best to have only one A for a function and to have it pushed as low into the organization as possible.

• Consult: “In the loop.” If someone needs to be involved prior to a decision or action, “C” is the appropriate designation. This helps facilitate improved, two-way communication across team members and stakeholders.

• Inform: “Keep in the picture.” This is for people who need to know once decisions are made or actions are completed. This also improves communication but is generally more one-way than “C”.



Below is an example of a high-level RACI matrix for a team. Note that it is possible to have more than one value per cell.

Responsibility Bob Sue Sally Marc Girish Sara Padma Requirements A R R Technical Design

C A/R R R I

Software Development

C I A R R R

Quality C I I C C A R Here’s another example of a high-level RACI that lays out responsibilities of various roles across a project life cycle:

Roles

Life Cycle Concept Analysis Design Build Test Deploy Close

Portfolio Manager Executive Sponsor Business Analyst Business Process Modeler

•Identify candidates (A) •Frame opportunity (A) •Validate benefits and costs at conceptual level (A) •Make Go/No Go decision (A)

•Prepare high level business requirements (A/R) •Conduct business process analysis (A/R) •Estimate benefits (A/R) •Prepare final recommendation and business case (A/R) •Facilitate Go/No Go decision (A/R)

A

R

A

Benefit tracking

A

Solution Architect Technical Analyst Designer I

•Evaluate solution architecture alternatives (R) •Prepare estimate (cost and risk) (R)

R A A R A

Solution Project Mgr Solution Developer

I •Prepare estimate (schedule) (R) A A/R A R A

Solution Project Mgr Solution Developer

I C A A A R R

QA Analyst I C C C R R C/R Security Lead C R I I I Portfolio Integrator Process Lead Risk Manager Metrics Manager

C C I I I




Team Player Roles and Responsibilities (continued)

A RACI matrix can be helpful in outlining the roles & responsibilities for a team. It is probably not sufficient alone—a leader must always be on the lookout for any confusion about roles and responsibilities. However, even a high level RACI in a Team Charter document can help a team get to “Perform” more quickly.




What We Value

It can be helpful for a team to articulate what is valued. Too often it can be perceived (even if unwritten) that the only things valued on the team are hitting dates and obeying the leader’s every wish. On any particular project the particulars of what is valued can have some variance. Yet there are some core things that the leader and team value that go beyond individual projects.

Example team values

• Leadership. We are paid to take initiative.

• Responsibility & Integrity. We say what we believe. We do what we say. When there are issues, we don’t hide them—we openly discuss them as early as possible.

• Respect. Everyone has a voice and we actively listen and acknowledge each other’s viewpoints. We ask for help when we need it, and offer it when we are able. We can have uncomfortable discussions but we will not cross the line of respect.

• Teamwork. We recognize each others successes and contributions. We all win when the team wins. We don’t take ourselves too seriously—we have fun.

• Creativity. We encourage each other to “think outside the box”. We challenge the status quo. We take responsible risks, knowing some will fail.

Laying out the values in a published team charter helps set expectations across team members. As a leader, you can hold team members accountable for living (or not living) the values. Just as importantly, you can be held accountable as well.




Team Key Performance Indicators

How do we know we are successful? Team key performance indicators (KPI’s) are measurable criteria that must be met for the team to be considered successful or on track. Often teams strive to make these KPI’s “SMART”: Specific, Measurable, Agreed upon, Realistic, Time-framed.

A KPI without a number is just a slogan. For example, “We will improve quality this year.” What does that mean? How do you know you improved it enough?

Alternatively, consider “Outstanding high priority defects will remain under x by the end of the year.” Or “Customer service ratings will be 6.7 or higher”. Do you see how making the KPI’s more specific and measurable make them useful?

Keep your focus on KPI’s that are truly measures of success (as opposed to those that happen to be measurable). Too many KPI’s can cause a team to lose focus and water down the overall value of having them in the first place.

Also, it is possible you do not currently have benchmarks to compare against. A project may need to be initiated to develop a baseline for KPI’s to be measured against.



More Than Just Working Well Together

When developing teams that deliver, we have to consider more than just how to help them work more effectively. We must also intentionally work at growing the leadership bandwidth of our teams.

• How would you rate the overall level of change at your job? Consider the following factors: Do priorities seem to change pretty regularly? Is the environment pretty stressful?

• How would you rate your team’s attitude towards process? Consider the following factors: Do you have pretty strict processes in place? Do all team members closely follow your processes?

• How would you rate the leadership bandwidth at your company? Consider the following factors: Do you have a lot of role models to observe and learn from or is it pretty spotty? Do you tend to have good leaders available when you need them, or are there a couple good ones and then the rest?

Low High

Cha

otic

Pred

icta

ble

Attitude towards process

Amou

nt o

f cha

nge

Leadership bandwidth



Organizational Entropy

The 2nd Law of Thermodynamics introduces a concept referred to as entropy. The law states, in effect, that in a closed system, entropy increases over time.

In other words, systems tend to go from order to disorder. Think of increasing entropy as increasing disorder.

What are ways you see entropy-like influences (or general disorder) in your:

• Projects?

• Workplace?

• Policies?



How Organizational Entropy Manifests Itself

In the workplace, entropy manifests itself in at least three ways:

• Uncertainty. Things we don’t know, can’t predict, and seem to have little control over.

• Complexity. Things that are difficult, beyond our current knowledge or expertise; things to which there seem no easy answers.

• Change. Similar to uncertainty, only in this case we’re referring to change we introduce ourselves that result in moving from order to disorder.

Our responses to organizational entropy vary widely. However subtle yet fundamental flaws often exist.

As companies and aspiring leaders we often deceive ourselves that:

• The chaos is temporary

• It can be defeated if we do the right stuff5

5 Outlaw Wisdom: Be wary of using the word right.



How Aspiring Leaders Battle Organizational Entropy

Though we are not making a scientific assertion, for the sake of a model, entropy is a reality in our roles as leaders. It’s here to stay. We will not defeat it.

Therefore, our mission as aspiring leaders is to:

• Learn to recognize it. Being aware, on the lookout for the symptoms caused by entropy.

• Actively fight it. Entropy only increases in a closed system. We can take steps to battle the causes and minimize the effects.

• Develop other leaders to join in the battle. One of the most effective actions we can take in the battle against entropy is to develop more leaders to share the load.

• Take care of ourselves. Finding greater balance between work and life helps keep us in the battle, helping to avoid burnout.

This mission is addressed more fully in a different workshop. For today’s discussion we will focus on developing other leaders.



Leadership and Entropy

Our executive coaching experience has found that a key weapon in the battle against entropy is leadership.

So, what is leadership in this context? What it is not:

• An environment of “all generals and no soldiers.”

• Having loads of charismatic, visionary leaders.

• A management track position or title.

What it is… A team of people characterized as:

• Proactive

• Willing to take risks and responsibility

• Able to get others to work well together with them

• Known for results, not just activities



Leadership and Entropy (continued)

How does leadership help battle entropy?

• The battle is too big -- developing leaders develops more ammunition against the enemy.

• A few overwhelmed leaders leave too many blind spots for disorder to sneak in

• Teams filled with leaders are able to focus, and entropy is all about distracting focus

• When new projects need leadership, there are people able & willing to take the helm. Our executive coaching experience has found that a key weapon in the battle against entropy is leadership.

Why is leadership so important?

• Leadership bandwidth is low in most organizations

• We often don’t hire for them or aggressively develop them.

• Often the leaders we do have are technical leaders and have little people leadership skills

• People become dependent on the one or two leaders making decisions leading to lack of ownership and responsibility

• If it’s not developed, we end up putting the wrong person in place, which creates even more entropy



The Birth of the Outlaw Team

Over the Christmas holiday in 1996, I was reading a book discussing origins of the universe and how the 2nd Law of Thermodynamics addresses certain issues. Though my goal was to not think about work, I couldn’t help but think of how the concept of entropy directly related to issues we were facing, such as:

• Inconsistent project success

• Limited leadership bandwidth to support project needs

• Weak in our skills to manage risk, priorities, scope, expectations

• No significant learning jump for our leadership team

I decided to build a leadership development strategy around these concepts, picking the name Outlaw Team and a theme of From Disorder to Order. The Outlaw term played off the 2nd Law aspect of the strategy and had a bit of an edge to provide an intriguing sense of identity and mission.

What We Did

• Held a kick-off meeting

• The team helped develop what was essentially a Team Charter, including what it means (and doesn’t mean) to be an Outlaw.

• Initiated our leadership incubator: the Outlaw Team Meeting

• Began an on-going process of learning to be better leaders.



Outlaw Team Meeting

Sending all team members to leadership development training can be a financially challenging option for many organizations. What if the leadership training was done in house, led by the managers themselves?

Rather than a one-time event, the Outlaw Team Meeting is designed to facilitate leadership learning on an on-going basis.

Here’s an overview of how our Outlaw Team Meeting was structured:

• 1-2 times per month for 90-120 minutes

• Leadership laboratory, not a status meeting

• Selected group of leaders (not just managers and project leaders, and not just all direct reports)

• Predefined agenda and materials

What are some advantages of?

• Having you and/or other managers lead these sessions instead of sending people to outside training?

• Learning leadership over time instead of a one-time training event?



Outlaw Team Meeting (continued)

The typical format for an Outlaw Team Meeting included:

• Current events. 15 minutes or less, with news important for participants to lead more effectively.

• Leadership laboratory. Growing your team through reading, analysis, interaction, and practical application. Topics are based on leadership competencies. Material comes from a variety of sources, such as industry press articles, books, newsletters, seminars, podcasts, web sites, etc.

Get team members engaged by:

• Exposing them to new ideas

• Having them summarize and present

• Allowing them to share from their own experience

• Encouraging them to apply ideas in their own team(s)



Additional Ideas

Potential ways to increase the value of the meeting include:

• Consider sharing the facilitator role

• Consider adding a You Make the Call segment to the meeting.

• Conducting a Lessons Learned session at least once a quarter.

• Regularly asking “What do we need to do differently based on what we’re learning?”

• Consider a Premium Subscription to The People and Projects Podcast, which helps you prepare for an Outlaw-like meeting.

What do you like about the Outlaw Team Meeting concept?

What concerns do you have?



Summary

• Leadership requires followership.

• A Team Charter can be a helpful tool for setting expectations, direction, and a basis for accountability.

• Developing leaders can help fight organizational entropy.

• Outlaw Teams can be an effective way to develop the leadership bandwidth of your organization.


Managing Conflict

Module 5 Managing Conflict

"Where all think alike, no one thinks very much."

Walter Lippmann, American writer “The harder the conflict, the more glorious the triumph. What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly.” Thomas Paine, American revolutionary “You can’t handle the truth!” Col. Jessep, from A Few Good Men “Conflict is inevitable, but combat is optional.” Max Lucado, author, pastor "Feedback is a gift."

Andy Kaufman


Managing Conflict

Dealing with Conflict

Conflict is a word with a lot of baggage! What comes to mind when you think of the word CONFLICT?

Often we hear responses such as

• Stress

• Arguments

• Fighting

• Avoid!

The reality is most people don’t have a very positive outlook about this topic!


Managing Conflict

Making This Personal

Use the space below to identify two recent conflict situations:

• One that you are satisfied with how it turned out

• One that you are not as satisfied with the result


Managing Conflict

Defining Conflict

From Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument by K. W. Thomas and R. H. Kilmann, 1974, 2000. Mountain View, CA: Xicom, Incorporated, subsidiary of CPP, Inc. Copyright 1974,

2000 by CPP, Inc. Used with permission.

“... the condition in which people’s concerns—the things they care about—appear to be

incompatible”

Kenneth W. Thomas


Managing Conflict

Exercise: All About Conflict

For the conflict situations you identified, what makes them difficult?

What are the primary sources in your life for learning about how to manage conflict?

Why is it important for leaders to learn how to manage conflict well?

What are the consequences of not dealing with conflict?


Managing Conflict

Learning About Conflict

Most people learn about managing conflict by seeing it modeled by others such as:

• Bosses

• Parents

• People in the public eye

Often these are not the best mentors when it comes to learning about managing conflict.


Managing Conflict

The 5 Conflict Handling Modes

The two-dimensional model of conflict-handling behavior below is adapted from an article entitled “Conflict and Conflict Management” by Kenneth Thomas in “The Handbook of Industrial and Organizational Psychology”. Thomas identified two basic dimensions that are involved when considering how we deal with conflict.

The first dimension is referred to as assertiveness. Think of this as the extent to which a person attempts to satisfy his or her own concerns. The other dimension is referred to as cooperativeness, and it is the extent to which a person attempts to satisfy the other person’s concerns.


Managing Conflict

Exercise: Considering the Modes

Which mode works best in your organization? Why do you think that? If you had to pick one or two modes that you use most often in conflict situations, which would you pick? Why? Which mode would be the most challenging for you to use more often? Why do you think that?


Managing Conflict

Understanding Your Style

Some people clearly see their typical conflict behavior in one or two of the modes. Others have trouble zeroing in on one or two. There is a way to find out more scientifically: using the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Mode Instrument (also known as the TKI).

To learn more about the TKI, visit: www.i-leadonline.com/TKIinfo.asp


Managing Conflict

Competing

Situations for Using the Competing Style

• Sparingly!

• Vital Issues When Collaborating Isn’t Feasible

• Protecting Yourself

Key Skills to Utilize the Competing Style

• Assertiveness

• Using Positional Power

• Accountability


Managing Conflict

Competing (continued)

Positional Power vs. Personal Power

Positional Power: Power because of my position:

• What I am compared to you

• Relies on people respecting the position

Personal Power: Power because of personal attributes

• Who I am: Character, values

• Style: How I interact


Managing Conflict

Collaborating

Situations for Using the Collaborating Style

• Important, Long-Term Issues

• Integrating Solutions & Perspectives

Key Skills to Utilize the Collaborating Style

• Setting the Right Tone

• Active Listening & Empathy

• Facilitated Decision-Making


Managing Conflict

Accommodating

Situations for Using the Accommodating Style

• Fulfill Your Role

• Make a Small Sacrifice

• Earn a Reciprocal Concession

• Yield to a Better Position

• Clean up Hard Feelings

Key Skills to Utilize the Accommodating Style

• Ability to Yield

• Long-Term Perspective


Managing Conflict

Avoiding

Situations for Using the Avoiding Style

• Overlook

• Not Your Issue

• De-fuse Emotions

• Little can be Gained

• Buying Time

Key Skills to Utilize the Avoiding Style

• Self-Control

• Setting Expectations

• Ability to Leave Things Unresolved


Managing Conflict

Compromising

Situations for Using the Compromising Style

• Issues of Moderate Importance

• Creating Short-Term Solutions

• Time Constraints

• Equal Power & Strong Commitment

Key Skills to Utilize the Compromising Style

• Making Concessions Wisely

• Using Principled Compromise


Managing Conflict

Exercise: Understanding the Modes

What tensions would exist between someone who normally uses the “Competing” approach and someone who normally uses “Accommodating”? How would you describe the difference between positional and personal power? Take a look at the style you previously identified as most challenging for you (see your notes on page 65). What skills do you most need to develop to be more effective with that mode? Regardless of style, what other skills did we discuss that you sense you need to develop?


Managing Conflict

The What-If-How Formula

To effectively manage a conflict situation, use the What-If-How Formula.

• What. Analyze the situation. Unbundle the issues and decide which ones are most concerning. Be able to summarize the issue in a sentence.

• If. Decide if you will confront the issue. Ask: “Is this an issue of right & wrong or preferences?” “Are the consequences worthy of a response?”

• How. What style is most appropriate? How will they likely react? Plan the conversation ahead of time to increase likelihood of success.

What-If-How Formula

• What is the issue? o Must unbundle to a sentence o Don’t skip this!

• If you will confront o Right/wrong or preference? o Consequences worthy?

• How to proceed o What style is appropriate? o Don’t “show up & throw up”


Managing Conflict

What: Unbundling the Issue

The situations leading up to the need for a conflict discussion are rarely one dimensional. Often there are a number of issues that complicate the situation. Choosing to address too many issues (or issues that are not as important) can make the leader’s efforts less effective.

Unbundling the issue means we strive to summarize the issue in a sentence.

What are some of the challenges of unbundling the issue?

• There are likely multiple issues

• Figuring out which one(s) to focus on

• Separating the person from the behavior

• Separating positions from interests

• Being careful about the stories you tell yourself Danger: Don’t skip this step. It’s too easy to make the conflict worse by not thinking it through.


Managing Conflict

What: Unbundling the Issue (continued)

Fundamental Attribution Error

Have you ever noticed it is easier to see problems in other people’s lives before we see them in our own? Similarly, there’s a tendency to jump to conclusions about other people when we notice issues in their lives (but we allow ourselves some room for rationalization when the problems are ours).

This is commonly referred to as a fundamental attribution error: the tendency to explain the behavior of others in terms of character rather than context.

When they “fly off the handle”, they have a self-control problem. When I do it, it was a matter of principle!

When unbundling the “What”, be careful about the stories you tell yourself, and seek to avoid committing the fundamental attribution error.


Managing Conflict

What: Unbundling the Issue (continued)

Key Questions to Ask

To help avoid committing the fundamental attribution error, ask the key questions:

• “Why would a reasonable, rational & decent person do that? “

• “What’s my part in this?”

• “What do I really want?”

• “What do they really want?”

How can these questions help if you ask them before taking any action?


Managing Conflict

If: Engage or Not to Engage?

It is helpful to make sure this is a situation that requires engaging in a conflict discussion. Not every situation will benefit from you taking action.

Ask:

• Is this an issue of right & wrong or preferences?

• Are the consequences worthy of a response?

In our years of administering leadership assessments, we have found many leaders who tend to be relatively low on tolerance. A consequence of this condition is they can be “black-and-white”, failing to see the shades of gray that may truly color the issue. Danger: We are masters of rationalization. Be careful to avoid minimizing the cost of not dealing with the issue and/or exaggerating the cost of engaging.


Managing Conflict

How: Planning the Conversation

Now that you’ve unbundled the issue and realize the conversation needs to happen, it’s time to plan it out.

Ask:

• What style is most appropriate? Would it be more effective to have a stern conversation with body language and tone that reflects the seriousness? Or would the person respond more productively if you built a case, laying out the facts in detail, leaving emotions out of the discussion. These questions can help you determine which conflict handling mode to use.

• How will they react? Based on your knowledge of them, how will they likely react? Will they immediately get defensive? Will they “clam up” and not say a word? Will they nod in agreement but not likely change? If you have some experience with the person, you can often have a reasonable idea of how they will react. Then you can think through your response.

• What results do I want? Look back at what you want and what you think they want. Keep your focus on the interests, not the positions.

Danger: In the emotion of the moment it is so easy to skip this step as well. The result is what we refer to as “show up and throw up”, a rather graphic way of saying we “wing it” and the discussion ends up getting ugly.


Managing Conflict

How: Planning the Conversation (continued)

DISARMing the Conflict

The DISARM formula can be helpful as a guide during a conversation aimed at resolving the conflict.

DescribeAcknowledge with “I” statementsStop & seek perspective with a questionActionReaffirmMaintain accountability

DescribeAcknowledge with “I” statementsStop & seek perspective with a questionActionReaffirmMaintain accountability

DISARMing the Conflict


Managing Conflict


DISARMing the Conflict (continued)

DISARM: Describe

When trying to resolve a conflict in a conversation, the first step is to make sure you appropriately (and concisely) describe the situation.

Is this overly obvious? Perhaps. Yet there are some too-often used alternatives:

• “Read my mind” (hoping they catch on)

• “Poison” (not giving person opportunities but not telling them)

• “Overload” (trying to address so many things the person is overwhelmed)

Since it can be natural to feel defensive in a conflict discussion, set a tone for safety by:

• Setting. A clear leadership principle is “give good news in public and bad news privately. Conflict discussions should be one-on-one using the richest medium you have available.

• Attitude. There is safety when you maintain complete respect. It should be clear you are not attacking them as an individual. It can be helpful to consider your own contributions to the problem, if applicable.

• Skills. Try using contrasting to preempt possible misunderstandings: “I’m not saying…. What I am saying is…” Active listening skills also create safety since the other person can see you are genuinely interested in their perspective.


Managing Conflict



DISARM: Describe (continued)

It can be helpful to “describe the gap”:

• Clearly describe the difference between what happened and what is expected

• Use facts

• Be specific

• Avoid “always”, “never”, and exaggerations

• Watch for safety

Throughout the conversation, work to keep what you say and how you say it aligned.


Managing Conflict



DISARM: Acknowledge with “I” Statements

It’s usually OK to share how you personally feel about the issue. For example:

• “I feel blindsided when….”

• “It frustrates me when our project slips because….”

Consider how much more effective “I” statements can be than “you-blaming” statements, such as:

• “You’re wrong!” (better “I” statement: “I see it differently…”)

• “You screwed it up for us all!” (“The impact on the team when this happens is…”)

• “You clearly said…” (“I thought we agreed…”)


Managing Conflict



DISARM: Stop and Seek Perspective with a Question

As much as we try to unbundle a situation, the reality is we are doing so with a limited perspective. There is a reasonable chance that we do not completely understand all the nuances of what occurred.

Recommendation: Stop with a question as soon as possible. This allows them to engage into the process (and may help keep you from digging a deeper hole for yourself if you didn’t read the situation appropriately).

• Instead of “What’s wrong with you?” ask “What happened?”

• Instead of “What could you have possibly been thinking?” ask “What’s your take on this?”

Listen closely to what the person says, watching to see if it’s an issue of ability, motivation, or both.


Managing Conflict



DISARM: Action

Conflict resolution without some agreed upon actions is just venting. You have to get to agreement on next actions.

They are more likely to be motivated to act if they understand the consequences. Consider helping them see the natural consequences of the behavior. For example:

• “If this doesn’t change you’re less likely to get the type of assignments you’ve been asking for.”

• “If you learn to control your anger in those situations they’re more likely to actually listen to what you’re saying.”

• “When deadlines are missed I have to get more involved which means you have to deal with me looking over your shoulder more.”

You may have to keep digging for consequences that get traction, but you’ll usually get better results if the person is truly motivated on their own.


Managing Conflict



DISARM: Action (continued)

Another way to motivate is to seek mutual purpose:

• Where you both agree

• Where you have shared goals

Mutual purpose helps separate goals/strategies from positions. For example:

• “I know we differ on the best approach but I think we both agree we want to do what’s best for the customer.”

• “Ultimately I think we want the same thing…”

Agree on next steps using the 3W’s: What, Who, and When. Make sure to check for understanding. Make sure to say, “If something comes up, make sure to tell me right away.”


Managing Conflict



DISARM: Reaffirm

After an action plan is made, it is helpful to reaffirm your confidence in them. By reaffirming their worth and ability, they are more likely to put their energy into working on the actions than wondering if they still have a job.

DISARM: Maintain Accountability

A flawless conflict resolution discussion can be destroyed by lack of accountability afterwards. If you don’t pay attention to progress (or lack thereof), it’s reasonable the other person might not as well.

In your discussion, agree on how progress will be tracked (e.g. a weekly check-in). When reviewing progress, make sure to praise progress. If the person starts backsliding, address it immediately before the person can get too far off track.


Managing Conflict


Pitfalls during DISARM

It is possible that safety will be lost during the discussion. Signs of that include the person getting angry, defensive, silent, or even violent. If so, you have to go back to creating safety through:

• Mutual respect

• Mutual purpose

• Contrasting

You need to deal with the safety issues before going on. If not, it’s likely the person will not buy into whatever plan that results from the discussion.

In addition to safety issues, it’s possible that new issues will surface. Sometimes this is done to throw you off course. Other times this is just a result of the issue being more than one-dimensional. Such “collateral conflicts” are not uncommon, and often stem not just from what we say but how we say it.

When new issues arise, mentally decide if they need to be dealt with now or later. You may have to start “What, If, and How” over if necessary. If the new issue must be dealt with now, leave a “bookmark” so you can return to the conversation. You can do this by using statements such as:

• “We need to talk about what just happened.”

• “Good point. We will need to finish our conversation on the project. But let’s discuss your concern about…”

Finally, there will be times when you seemingly do everything “right”, yet the conflict doesn’t seem resolvable. You need to recognize your limits, especially if you don’t have any positional power to fall back on. Try to get agreement to address the issue later, assuming it’s big enough to warrant it. Also, there can be value in bringing in a third party that is respected by both people to facilitate a resolution.


Managing Conflict

Exercise: Practicing the Process

Part A. Scenarios For each of these scenarios, identify:

• What is the issue, in a sentence?

• How would you respond, using each of the conflict handling modes?

• Which mode would you recommend?

Scenario 1: Tasks you expected to be completed are not complete. You had no indication that the tasks would not be completed on time. Much work depends on these unfinished tasks. The person responsible has been doing good work and recently was successful resolving some significant issues. You have requested a meeting with this person to find out why the tasks were not completed on time.

Summarize the issue in a sentence:

How would each of the styles respond? Circle the style you recommend.

• Competing:

• Collaborating:

• Compromising:

• Accommodating:

• Avoiding:


Managing Conflict

Exercise: Practicing the Process (continued)

Part A. Scenarios (continued)

Scenario 2: You are managing a large project with several teams reporting to you. One of the teams is behind schedule. The team leader has submitted a plan for taking corrective action, but you do not think the new plan is aggressive enough. He thinks the plan is very aggressive. You have set up a meeting with the team leader to give your feedback.

Summarize the issue in a sentence:

How would each of the styles respond? Circle the style you recommend.

• Competing:

• Collaborating:

• Compromising:

• Accommodating:

• Avoiding:

Part B. Real World Observation

Watch for a conflict that happens around you in the near future. How would you unbundle the issue to a sentence? What styles did you see people using? What was effective? What was not done well?


Managing Conflict

Exercise: Practicing the Process (continued)

Part C. Making this Personal Back on page 60 you identified two recent conflict situations. Based on what you’ve learned in this workshop, answer the following: What conflict modes were being used? How would you approach the situations differently as a result of what you’ve learned today?


Improving Our Influence

Module 6 Improving Our Influence

“You don't have to be a ‘person of influence’ to be influential. In fact, the most influential people in my life are probably not even aware of the things they've taught me.”

Scott Adams, American cartoonist of Dilbert fame “Leadership is influence.” John Maxwell, American author “The greatest ability in business is to get along with others and to influence their actions.” John Hancock, Politician and scholar “In the past a leader was a boss. Today’s leaders must be partners with their people. They no longer can lead solely based on positional power.” Ken Blanchard, American author



Definitions of Influence and Power

What comes to mind when you think of the term power?

How about influence? How does it seem different to you?

One way to define the terms includes:

• Power. The ability to act or produce an effect.

• Influence. The capacity to have an effect on the character, development, or behavior of someone or something.

One of the foremost experts on influence is Dr. Robert Cialdini. Here is how he explains influence:

“Influence means change… creating change in some way. Change can be in an attitude; it can be in a perception; or a behavior. But in all instances, we can't lay claim to influence until we can demonstrate that we've changed someone.”6

6 Source: Interview with Guy Kawasaki, http://blog.guykawasaki.com/2006/04/book_review_inf.html



Influence or Manipulation?

Influence can easily be misinterpreted as manipulation. How would you differentiate influence from manipulation?

• Are we sincere or faking it?

• Are we being truthful or deceptive?

• Are we being self-seeking or looking for mutual benefit?

In the same interview, Dr. Cialdini addressed this important issue this way:

“Fortunately, the way to be ethical in the use of these principles is the same as the way to be profitable in using them: Always be sure to influence another in a way that ensures that you haven't damaged your ability to influence this person again in the future. In other words, the other person must benefit from the change you've created.”



Power and Followers

Robert Larison observed that “Power and authority come from the person being influenced, not the person in the more powerful position. If the follower chooses to not follow them, they are no longer leaders. Leadership is really followership.”

Our power is ultimately not from our position. If a police officer is standing in a busy intersection trying to stop traffic but a crowd of people are running past them in a panic, the officer has little power. Leadership (and influence) rely on followership—getting people to want to follow us.

Who Do You Need to Influence?

Who Desired Result What Makes it Difficult?



Raven & French Powers7

Raven and French studies the sources, or bases, of power available for influencing. Understanding these powers can broaden our ability to influence effectively.

Reward and Coercive

A person has power because:

• Reward. They can provide positive reinforcement for the desired behavior.

• Coercive. They have the potential to inflict punishment.

Project managers can extend rewards such as favorable assignments, and positive messages to team member or stakeholder managers. Though the term punishment seems strong, project managers may have the ability to provide critical feedback for performance reviews, and change a team member to a less favorable assignment.

Referent and Legitimate


• Referent. They have respect and esteem by virtue of personal attributes with which others identify.

• Legitimate. They have authority by virtue of their position in the organization.

Ever have someone talk you into something, just because of who they are? Chances are they have a lot of Referent power. Legitimate power is based completely on their position. If they are your supervisor, they have what Raven and French call Legitimate power.

7 French, J. P. R. Jr., and Raven, B. (1960). The bases of social power. In D. Cartwright and A. Zander (eds.), Group dynamics (pp. 607-623). New York: Harper and Row.



Expert and Informational


• Expert. They have recognized expertise.

• Informational. They have the ability to control the availability and accuracy of information.

If you are perceived as an expert in one or more areas of your organization, you have greater influence. The nice thing about Expert power is it does not require a promotion. Diligent study and action (including getting certified as a Project Management Professional) can lead to increased Expert power. “Information is power” is an often used maxim. Though it’s true, keeping information to yourself is not only difficult in today’s technological environment, it is also often limiting to team effectiveness.

Connectional

This says a person has power because of whom they know and the support they engender from others as a result. The phrase “It’s not what you know but who you know!” summarizes this power source.

Which sources would you expect to be least effective, most of the time? Most effective?

Power Least? Most? Reward Coercive Legitimate Referent Expert Informational Connectional



Ideas to Increase Your Influence

Reward Power Look for opportunities to:

• Recognize (compliment, praise) others

• Provide favorable assignments

• Provide additional resources

• Respond favorably to requests

• Use non-verbals, such as attention, open and non-aggressive gestures to show acceptance

Referent Power

• Work on your people skills. Dale Carnegie suggests you be others focused instead of self-focused. Dr. Cialdini’s book has practical insights regarding how to be more “liked”.

• Continue to increase your trust score. Key factors of trust include Competence, Intent, and Integrity

Expert Power Identify & develop what expertise is valued by your organization. Opportunities include:

• Pursue certifications/degrees

• Speak at conferences

• Begin a blog, write a book

• Read/share articles

• Volunteer for projects

In addition, look for opportunities to become the “go to” person at work. In presentations, add credibility by using facts, quotes, and references.



Cialdini’s Weapons of Influence

Two recommended resources for learning more about influence include:

• Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion, by Dr. Robert Cialdini.

• Yes! 50 Scientifically Proven Ways to Be Persuasive, by Cialdini, Goldstein, and Martin.

In those books, the authors describe what Cialdini calls six “weapons of influence”.

Reciprocation This says that “whatever you give is what you’re going to get (and maybe more)”. It’s an extremely powerful source of influence and can even apply to unwanted favors & concessions. Beware of the rejection-then-retreat variation where someone makes an extreme request (“I need all of this scope!”) then retreats to a smaller one (“OK, I just need this.”). Commitment & Consistency This says that “people are more likely to do what they commit to.” A key to this weapon is to secure the initial commitment, even a small one. Research has shown that after taking a stand/position, people are more willing to agree with requests in keeping with it. It works best when the person is actively involved in making the commitment, it requires effort, and the commitment is made publicly. Cialdini warns you should be careful about agreeing to trivial requests as that may lead you to making more concessions.

Social Proof This says that “in ambiguity, people tend to follow the crowd.” It’s the equivalent of a teenager saying, “But mom, all the other parents said it’s OK!” This is most influential where there is greater uncertainty and ambiguity (i.e. “I don’t know what to do so I’ll follow them”) or when there is a lot of Similarity (i.e. following the lead of people similar to us). Cialdini warns about accepting counterfeit evidence.



Liking This says that “people prefer to say ‘yes’ to individuals they know and like.” We can sometimes agree to things because we like someone or are attracted to them. It is important evaluate the deal, offer, or situation, not just the person. Elements of this weapon include Physical Attractiveness, Similarity, Praise, and Increased Familiarity. Each of these are areas we can develop to improve our influence as well as be aware of to defend against others unduly influencing us. Authority This says that “people are more likely to heed the advice of experts.” Cialdini notes three symbols that are particularly effective, including Title (Dr., V.P., certifications, etc.), Dress (uniform, business suit), and Trappings (automobile, accessories). It’s important to ask yourself, “Is this person really an expert?” Scarcity This says that “people want more of what they can’t have.” Cialdini find this is most powerful when scarce items are newly scarce (or recently restricted) and when we compete with others (e.g. paying too much for an item on an online auction site because we were competing against someone else for the win). A project manager could use scarcity to say “If we don’t decide by Friday, the project slips by a week.” A key when this is used against us is to focus on the merits, not the urgency. All of these techniques work most effectively if you’ve done the work ahead of time of developing relationships and earning reciprocity.



Influencing Without Authority

An additional recommended resource for learning more about influencing includes Influence Without Authority, by Dr. Allan Cohen.

In this book, Dr. Cohen discusses influence as a form of exchange. He uses terms such as currency, deposits, withdrawals, and balances to describe how you build, use, and lose influence.

The Cohen-Bradford Influence Model describes the process for being influential even when you do not have authority. Since this is a position that project managers often find themselves in, it’s a helpful model to understand.

The first step is to assume all are potential allies. An ally is not necessarily a friend—it is someone who can share similar objectives. Assuming others are allies can help minimize the “stories” we might tell ourselves about someone else (“they’ll never agree to this”). It can help us move into “inquiry mode” where we look for options instead of making unhelpful (and even nasty) assumptions.

Second, you need to clarify your goals and priorities. This may seem like a given, but too often we “show up and throw up!” By doing this it can help separate any agendas we might otherwise have. It can help answer questions such as, “What do I need to get my work done?” and “How do I help them get their work done?”

Third, the model recommends you diagnose the world of the other person. Ask questions such as “What drives them? What do they care about? Why? How are they rewarded? What expectations do they have from their bosses? Peers? What is their work history?” This won’t tell you everything you need but could provide some insights to begin from. If we skip this, we can get blindsided or go over a cliff with them on unrelated or less important issues.



Fourth, it’s important to identify relevant currencies: theirs and yours. Currencies can be apples and oranges as long they seem to be equal when added together. Ask, “What do they value? What do we have or could get?” Some potential currencies can include information you can give out, shared credit, raising someone’s reputation, opportunity to learn, personal recognition, and food! Cohen finds people often have more currency than they think—it just takes time and practice to identify.

Fifth, it’s critical to deal with relationships. The dirty little secret of business is that it’s all done on relationships. If you have strong relationships with others, it is easier to influence them without authority. Cohen asserts, “People who have the most number of relationships in an organization are usually the ones who have the most influence. There’s more to draw on when something needs to be done.” Prioritize time to develop relationships outside of when you need to influence (which is another way of saying, “Dig the well before you’re thirsty!”). Ideas include leveraging your lunch time (and location), and join task forces. Remember that credibility is currency: keep focused on delivering value & developing trust. Don’t fake it: they can smell manipulation.

Finally, the process concludes with influence through give and take. Positive exchanges are the best way to start. Always give people a choice by using a warning before a negative exchange. But if necessary, negative exchanges can be used in this process. They might include escalating an issue to a boss, in person or in writing, or stopping favors.



Barriers to Influencing Without Authority

Perhaps the biggest barrier to this process is trying to influence at the point when you need it instead of building up currency ahead of time. Both Cohen and Cialdini stress this. Constantly look for ways to be helpful. Strive to make other people’s lives better.

Another major barrier is behaving in a way that builds a self-serving relationship. It can't become “it's all about me.”

Perhaps the best advice is to not focus on becoming more influential! Focus on building relationships and making problems go away for other people. By doing so, you’ll become more influential.

Taking Action

In the coming days and weeks, watch for these techniques being used. Try a couple of them yourself! Note what worked well and what could have gone better. Commit to refining your influence skills and you can greatly improve your ability to deliver projects and lead teams.



Influence Scenarios Exercise

For each of the following scenarios, identify:

• What is the issue, in a sentence?

• How would you respond with positional power? Personal power?

• What influence tactics would you recommend?

1. Client (or a manager in your organization) demands you use a process that you think is needlessly complex.

2. Your company management team wants you to spend more time developing teammates. You don’t have a spare minute.

3. Stakeholders demand additional scope on your project without allowing more time or cost, significantly risking date and quality.

4. Technical resource wants to implement a design that has serious limitations from your perspective.

5. A fellow employee of our organization is struggling on a project. You have the ability to help but the other person has made it clear they don’t want it.

6. You notice that a member of the Client Service team is promising something that you don’t think can be delivered.

7. You are being asked to move from one cubical to another. Both are close to your team but you really want to stay in the current one. The other one has higher traffic walking by it and is noisier.

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