+ the challenges to marriage التحديات الخطيرة في الزواج والأسرة st...

+The Challenges to Marriage

الزواج في الخطيرة التحدياتواألسرة

St George & St Joseph Coptic Orthodox Church, Montreal, QCCouples Meeting – September 24, 2015

Yousry Armanios, M.D.

YARMANIOS@HOTMAIL.COM

+المسيحي البيت

من اليوم ألنفسكم اختارواوبيتي أنا أما تعبدون

الرب فنعبد

24:15يشوع

JUST MARRIED! JUST MARRIED!

What God Has Joined Together, Let Not

Man Separate” (Matthew 19:6)

What God Has Joined Together, Let Not

Man Separate” (Matthew 19:6)

The Ultimate: Marriage!

And, Family Life

Love Overcomes the ChallengesLove Overcomes the Challenges

All Challenges!All Challenges!

التحديات على يتغلب التحديات الحب على يتغلب الحب

Love Never Fails!Love Never Fails!

! � أبدا تسقط ال !المحبة � أبدا تسقط ال المحبة

The Ten ChallengesThe Ten Challenges

1. Our Ego!

2. Resolving the Differences

3. Leaving

4. Intimacy

5. Mammon

6. Boredom

7. Communication

8. Keeping the Boundaries

9. Mutual Trust

10. The New Visitors!

1. Our Ego!

2. Resolving the Differences

3. Leaving

4. Intimacy

5. Mammon

6. Boredom

7. Communication

8. Keeping the Boundaries

9. Mutual Trust

10. The New Visitors!

الذات 1.

اإلختالفات 2. حل

الترك 3.

االلتصاق 4.

ياتمادال 5.

مللال 6.

التواصل 7.

الحدود 8. إبقاء

المتبادلة 9. الثقة.10 ! الجدد الزوار

الذات 1.

اإلختالفات 2. حل

الترك 3.

االلتصاق 4.

ياتمادال 5.

مللال 6.

التواصل 7.

الحدود 8. إبقاء

المتبادلة 9. الثقة.10 ! الجدد الزوار

تحديات تحديات العشرة العشرة

تحديات العشرة

1. الذات 2. اإلختالفات حل3. الترك4. االلتصاق5. ياتمادال 6. مللال 7. التواصل8. الحدود إبقاء9. المتبادلة الثقة10. الجدد !الزوار

Proper Communication:

Both spouses may love each other dearly, but without proper

communication, that love goes unnoticed and the result is often

terrible and tragic!

Our Feelings When,

We Don’t CommunicateOr

Miscommunicate

How Does It Feel When …?

The Image of God!Communication is about Love!

“So then, they are no longer two but one flesh.

“Therefore, what God has joined together, let not man separate”

Matthew 19:6

1. The Radio:One-Way Communication!

2. “Skype”

Two-Ways Communication!

So, How Should We Communicate?

1. Verbal Communication

2. Non-Verbal Communication

1. Verbal CommunicationPlease Consider …

• Changing Your Old Stereotypes

• Improving Your Skills: LISTEN

• Each Other’s Right for Self-Expression

• Using Always the “I” Statements!

Verbal Communication Takes Time to Help Us Understand our Differences

• For women, it’s an end in itself

• For men, it’s more of a means towards a goal

• For both, it builds mutual interest and trust

Communication & Listening

“Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow

to become angry.” (James 1:19)

The Assertive “I” StatementsExercise:

1. “I” Feel …!

2. “I” Think …!

3. “I” Believe …!

4. “I” Need …!

2. Non-Verbal Communication

Facial Features & Body Language

“Other” Four Languages of Love:

1. Time Together!

2. Unexpected (Surprise) Gifts!

3. Silent Help!

4. Messaging: (Dress; Cook; Initiatives …)

Negative Communication Patterns (1)

• Interrupting

• Stonewalling

• Avoiding

• Ignoring

• Threatening

Negative Communication Patterns (2)

• Mind Reading

• Criticizing

• Monopolizing/Polarizing

• Cynicism

• Passive Aggressiveness

Validation of Feelings:Your Prescription for Success!

+ Spot the Feeling

+ Address the Feeling:

Examples:

• “Yes, I understand how you feel”!

• “You sound like you’re …”!

• “You look like you’re …”!

• “There’s something bothering you”!

The Outcome:Problem Solving

Many Problems Can Be Avoided

If:

• We Communicate Our Feelings!

Many Problems can Be Resolved

If:

• We Can Communicate Them Right!

+المسيحي البيت

من اليوم ألنفسكم اختارواوبيتي أنا أما تعبدون

الرب فنعبد

24:15يشوع

Finally, Always Remember that:

“Love Never Fails”! (1 Corinthians 13)

Thank YouQ & A

YARMANIOS@HOTMAIL.COM

Dr. Yousry Armanios

614-327-8289